Shadows of the Past, Realities of the Present
by lilxjames
Summary: Burke left her at the altar and never looked back. Now, 6 months later he is coming back. How will Chritina deal with it? Chaos ensues at SGH and feelings are hurt along the way. Will they ever be able to go back? Burketina-other pairings included-
1. A surprising phone call

Chapter 1: A Surprising Phone Call

**Time setting**: It's been 6 months since the season 3 finale when Burke left Christina at the alter. And about 3 months after 4.11 took place!

Dr. Preston Burke sat in his office at Boston General gazing at the ceiling. It has been 6 months today. 6 months since he had left Christina on their wedding day. Even to this day, he couldn't understand if he did the right thing or not. After leaving Christina on their wedding day, or more like the non-wedding dad, he had handed his resignation letter to Richard (who wasn't very happy with his decision) and transferred as Head of Cardiothrastic surgery at Boston General. No one except for the Chief knew where he was, not even his parents.

Preston sighed loudly and rubbed his hands over his tired face. It was 10 p.m at night, but he couldn't find the strength to get up and go to his apartment…His lonely apartment. It was nights like this he wished he had a friend, a close confidant who he could discuss his problems with so that he didn't have to carry this heavy burden of guilt and regret on his chest. Even though he has been in Boston for six months, he hasn't found any new friends or even acquaintances. Not that people didn't want to be his friend, after all he was Preston Burke, but because he didn't let anyone get to close to him.

Burke missed Seattle. He missed the chief, he missed Derek, George, hell he even missed the interns. But most of all, he missed her-Christina Yang. She was the only woman who had his heart, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't bring himself to move on. Thinking about her was too painful, so he decided not to think about her at all. However, this plan backfired soon, because she had taken up a permanent spot in his brain and his heart, and was just not going away.

He was jolted away from self-pity from the shrill sound of his cell phone ringing. Sighing again, he reached over for his cell-phone. Looking at the caller-id he was very surprised to see Richard's name blinking on the screen. He wondered why Richard Webber, chief of surgery at Seattle Grace would be calling him at 10 p.m at night. Deciding to take the call, he flipped open the phone and answered:

"Hello, Preston Burke speaking."

"Preston, this is Richard from Seattle Grace," Richard replied from the other end.

"Yea, I saw your name on the caller-id. To be honest, I am very surprised to be hearing from you."

"Well, we need your assistance here at Seattle Grace. We have a very interesting and intense case arrive here this morning," Richard answered, getting right to the point.

"Well, I would love to be of assistance to you, but why do you need me?" Preston wondered out loud, confused at why the chief was asking for his assistance while SGH had Erica Hahn on their team now. Continuing he said: "I mean, if it has something to do with cardio, I am pretty sure Dr. Hahn is more than capable to handle it herself. I heard she is the new Head of cardio."

"Yes, she is, but this is a high magnitude case and we need more than one skilled cardio surgeon to operate. I am pretty sure you will agree with me once you hear about the case. You see, today morning 2 conjoined twins arrived at the hospital. The twins are conjoined in a very complicated way. They are conjoined from the chest, and not only that, their X-rays show that the twins are conjoined in a way that the right ventricles of their hearts are very close to each other. However, there is a chance that the twins can be separated. This will require a massive surgery and we need more than one skilled cardio surgeon to pull it off. After a meeting with Dr. Hahn and the Board, we have decided that it will be in our best interest to have three cardio surgeons for the surgery. One of them obviously is Dr. Hahn, and the other two are you and Dr. Jason Kurt from Chicago Memorial." Richard finished.

"Hmm…that does sound like a great case, but I don't know if the chief here will let me off….."

"I talked to the chief of BMH and he has agreed to let you off for a week starting tomorrow for the case."

"O, well in that case…I will take you offer Richard. Just tell me when I have to leave."

"You leave tomorrow afternoon, and will be staying here for about a week, because further tests will have to be taken before the surgery can be performed, and that might take a couple of days." Richard explained.

"Alright then Richard, I guess I will be seeing you tomorrow."

"That's great. I will send a hospital's driver to pick you up from the airport and then I will meet you in my office. And Preston, I am glad you took me up on my offer. Have a nice trip. Bye." Richard answered, ending the call.

Burke slowly took the phone away from his ear, wondering if he had made the right decision in going back.

"O well there's no turning back now. It's just for a week anyways. What could go wrong in a week?" he questioned himself.

As he got ready to go back to his apartment and get ready for his trip tomorrow, he had no idea how wrong he was. A lot could go wrong in one week!

**A/N:** This is a Burktina fic, however other characters and character pairings will be very involved. I know its a little boring start right now, but it will get interesting soon. Please, please, please review even though I know I am a crappy writer! Constructive criticism welcome but NO flames. Also, a question to you readers, for this fanfic…would you want George/Callie to be a couple…I want to know what you guys think! Once again thanks for reading and **REVIEW**!!


	2. Girl's night out

Chapter 2: Girl's night out

While Burke was at his apartment packing his stuff for his trip tomorrow, two of Seattle Grace's first year residents were enjoying drinks at Joe's.

It was 10 p.m in Seattle, and Christina and Izzie were sitting in Joe, waiting for Meredith to join them after her date. They had both had long days at the hospital today and were just planning to relax and maybe get drunk tonight. Christina was in a especially good mood today because Dr. Hahn had specifically requested her for a valve replacement surgery today, a fact that Izzie wasn't too pleased about. The door tinkled and Izzie looked up to see Meredith walk in, wearing tight fighting black dress, that went right up to her knees and hugged her curves just in the right places. She spotted her friends in the crowd and made her way over. Izzie noticed many guys eyeing her as she made her way towards them. When she reached them, Christina turned her head to acknowledge her presence, and raised her eyebrows after seeing how dressed up she was.

"Why are you so dressed up?" she demanded. "And you also have a happy look on your face too. Guess somebody had a good date". She said the last part with a hint of hurt in her voice. She hadn't been on a single date since Burke had left her, which meant that it had been six months since she had sex, and that has to be some sort of record for her.

"Well, hello to you too. Somebody's cranky today. Bad day?" Meredith questioned. Meredith had the day off today, so she didn't know what happened in the hospital today.

"No," Christina retorted. "I had a great day actually. Hahn requested me to scrub in on her valve replacement surgery today." Christina finished, with a smug look of her face.

"Well, seems like she's coming to terms with you. About time actually, it's been 3 months since she started at SGH. Well, I guess you are just naturally bitter." Meredith smirked as Christina gave her a look of contempt.

"I think she needs to get laid", Izzie remarked, finally getting into the conversation.

"I think you might be right about that Barbie," Christina snapped, signaling Joe to get her another shot of tequila. "It's been six months since I had sex. SIX MONTHS!" she replied drunkenly, chugging the whole shot of tequila in one gulp.

"Christina you just agreed to something Izzie said. That has to be a miracle. But yea, you do need to get moving in the dating business again. It's been six months since Burke left and you haven't been on one date."

"You know I don't do all the dating crap. I tried once and look where it got me. At an altar with fake eyebrows and no groom. Yea, that worked out really well." Christina finished sarcastically.

Izzie and Meredith shared a secret glance. They knew that their friend wasn't over Burke as she is always claiming to be. The fact that she hadn't slept with some is enough justification of the fact. However, deciding not to push the topic, Izzie turned to Meredith.

"So, how was your date? Considering what you are wearing, I am assuming he took you some place classy." Izzie finished with a laugh. Meredith had been dating Neil Jacobson, a renowned lawyer in Seattle for about 3 weeks now. They had met on the ferry and had seem to click immediately. Meredith wasn't completely over Derek, but she was close. Plus, he was still with that Nurse, so it was only sensible for her to move on too. So far, the relationship has been good, and Meredith actually found herself to be happy.

"Yea, we went to this classy Italian restaurant. It looked pretty expensive, but Izzie, I gotta say the food was awesome." Meredith answered with a smile. "Mer you know it really isn't fair that you get all the hot guys. First it was Derek, then Finn, and now Neil. You really do attract all the good ones." Izzie said half amused, half frustrated. Meredith laughed out loud, but before she could say anything, Christina interrupted saying: "Do you know that McBastard broke up with his scrub nurse today?"

Meredith looked up surprised at this new piece of information. "O yea, I think the whole hospital know. It wasn't exactly private." Izzie said smirking.

"Yea, according to him, they didn't really click." Christina said mimicking Derek's voice.

"Of course they didn't click. They were together for 3 months and they hadn't slept together, according to the nurse gossip." Izzie added.

Meredith listened in shock the conversation between her two friends. But, Izzie's last sentence bought her back to reality. "They didn't have sex. The whole time?! Seriously?" She asked, shocked beyond belief. "Yea, well according to the nurses, and their information should be correct, after all Rose is a nurse." Izzie answered. "Wow, I really missed out today." Meredith stated, wishing she had been there to see the breakup.

"Wait, you aren't planning to go back to him now right? Just because he is single doesn't mean he is no longer a McBastard." Christina stated seriously.

"No, of course not. I am over him. I am no longer the weak and pathetic Meredith that just gives in to him whenever he decides to give me the time of the day. We're done. We are over. For good this time." Meredith declared strongly, convincing both herself and Christina. She was tired of being the second best. He had picked two women over her in a period of one year. She was done with him and his McDreaminess. She was dating and she was happy. "I don't need Derek to make me happy anymore", Meredith resolved.

Changing the subject, she said: "You know Christina we should hook you up on a blind date. That's the only way you will get a boyfriend and hopefully get laid, which might make you a little less bitter," Meredith said in a thoughtful tone. Izzie apparently liked the idea, and exclaimed: "Meredith is right Christina. You keep saying you are over Burke, but we are not convinced…" Cristina chose this moment to interrupt Izzie's rambling. "Ok one, you guys must be incredibly drunk or incredibly stupid to think that I will let you set me up on a blind date. Second, and more importantly, I am over Burke, 100 over him. He left me remember, and it was six months ago, and that's way more than enough time for me to get over him." Izzie opened her mouth, wanting to interrupt, but Christina beat her too it: "Wait one sec Barbie, and before you say anything about another date, let me tell you something: I am going on a date tomorrow." Christina finished smirking at the stunned faces of her two friends.

"What?!" Izzie exclaimed

"When the hell did that happen? Why didn't you tell me?" Meredith demanded.

"Oh don't get your knickers in a twist. He asked me out today and I said yes." Christina said simply, purposely ignoring the question shining on both of their faces. Realizing that Christina was not saying any more, Meredith and Izzie exclaimed: "Well…who is it?"

Christina smirked at the questioning and eager look of her friends' faces and replied. "Well, if you really want to know, its Jacob Nelson, head of ortho surgery." Meredith and Izzie looked even more shocked at this, if that was possible. "Dr.Nelson?! How the hell did you score with him? Even though he's one of the hottest doctors in the hospital, he rarely ask a staff member out." Izzie said, wondering how Meredith and Christina always get the hot guys. Life could be so unfair at times. "Well, I scrubbed in one of his surgeries two days ago, and as usual expressed my great dislike for ortho. Instead of being offended, he seemed amused, and then today he came up to me while I was doing the post-op notes for Hahn's surgery, and said that he was really impressed by my work and had had apparently heard of my reputation as the cardio god." Here she stopped and smirked at the sour look on Izzie's face. "Well," she continued "I asked him if he wanted anything, and he straight out asked me if I would like to go to dinner with him tomorrow. I told him I didn't do all the dating whatever, and he's all like 'don't worry we'll work something out', I thought for a second and decided, what the hell, he's hot, and what do I have to loose. So, I said ok." Christina finished, looking up to see the amused look on her friend's faces. Recovering from Christina's long ramble, Izzie spoke up: "Well, congratulations. As McSteamy would say: You have learned how to get back on the horse." Izzie said laughing.

Christina looked up to see Meredith looking at her with a very peculiar expression. "What?" Christina demanded. "Oh nothing, so you really are over Burke? I was pretty sure you weren't." Meredith answered to her demanding look. "Yes, for the thousandth time, I am over him. He's gone and he's never coming back. Remember Mama said he won't be coming back…well she didn't exactly say it, but she did imply it. But that's not the point. He moved, and that helped me move on." Christina replied in an agitated tone. He was sick and tired of people saying that she wasn't over Burke, when she clearly was. "So," Meredith began slowly, "If Burke did come back, you know if he ever does, you will not go back to him? It will only stay professional between you guys?" Meredith asked the question that had been nagging her ever since the first time Christina said she was over Burke. Christina rolled her eyes at Meredith's question. What a stupid thing to ask. She is Christina Yang, and she has self-dignity, she will in no way go back to the guy that had broken her so deeply. "Who do you think I am? Of course I won't go back to him. And, why are we even discussing this? He's not coming back, ever. He resigned, remember? So there's nothing to worry about, because he will never be seen in the halls of Seattle Grace again." Christina said in a determined tone that made it clear to Meredith and Izzie that the topic was finished.

What Christina didn't know, was that in less than 24 hours, Dr. Preston Burke will be once again seen in the halls of Seattle Grace, and at that time, she will be eating her words.

**A/N: ** First of all, thank you ALL for the awesome reviews. You guys completely made my day! I have gotten a good audience for my story and I would like to thank all of you guys once again for the great advice. This chapter revolves around Christina, I felt this was an important chapter, because it explains where Christina stands. I added a little of Mer's love life, from the request of some of the reviewers. So obviously, next chapter Burke arrives at Seattle. So, how many of you guys want Christina and Dr.Nelson to hook up? Just for a while of course. Tell me what you think! So, thanks for reading, and keep the reviews coming! It motivates me to update faster (wink wink)! And on the last note **REVIEW!**


	3. Welcome Home

Chapter 3: Welcome Home

Burke's flight to Seattle was to leave from Logan International Airport at 5 p.m and was supposed to reach Seattle-Tacoma International Airport at 8 p.m (11 p.m Boston time because of the time difference). It was going to be a long flight, giving Burke more than enough time to review the conjoined twins' case that Richard had faxed him. He had to admit, it was a very complicated case, but at the same time it was probably the most interesting and unique case he had seen in the ten years he had been a cardiothrastic surgeon. After he had finished going through the details of the case, he realized there were still more than 3 hours till he reached Seattle, and decided to take a little nap, so that he was alert and ready for his meeting with the chief.

Last night when he had reached home after Richard's call, he had packed his stuff in a small duffel bag and had spent the entire night lying awake. He knew he was being silly, but he just couldn't sleep. The fact that he was going back to Seattle had finally registered to him, and just that thought was enough to make the nerves hit him. He had sworn to himself that he would never set foot in Seattle again. There was too much baggage there, too many memories that he didn't want to think about. The fact that he was going back, even for a week, had brought back all the memories that he was trying so hard to forget. The same memories that had driven him all across the country. And there was just one person that had dominated all his memories, the one person that had been the love of his life, and who still haunted his dreams. That one person was Christina Yang. No matter how he tried, he couldn't get over her. Every time he closed his eyes, he could see her shocked and hurt face when he had told her that he can't marry her. If he could just get one chance to change one mistake he had made, he would go back to six months ago and have married her, instead of leaving her alone at the altar.

Burke woke up with a start as he felt the plane land at the airport. He cursed the bad timing as he had just been awoken from a very nice dream about him and Christina. In the dream Christina had just told him that she was pregnant, and before he could have replied, he was shaken awake as the plan lurched at the landing.

Sighing, he waited a second to gather his thoughts, and then got up to locate his duffel bag, as the pilot made the announcement that they had arrived in Seattle.

The second he got out of the airport, he knew without a doubt that he was definitely in Seattle. The dark, dreary skies and the downpour of rain left nothing to imagination. Sighing once again, he looked around and found himself face to face with Richard's smiling chauffer.

"Dr. Burke?" he questioned in a thick Armenian accent. Dr. Webber had shown him a picture of Burke before he had left for the airport, so that it would be easier to spot him in the airport crowd.

"Yea", Burke said extending his hand. "And you must be Daron, Richard's chauffer."

"Yes sir that would be correct. Why don't you get in the car, it's pretty cold out today." Daron said.

Burke got in the backseat of the car, while Daron got behind the wheel.

"So Dr. Burke, will you like to go to your hotel first to freshen up or do you want to meet Dr. Webber first?" Daron questioned as he drove through the busy Seattle streets.

Burke thought for a while and then replied: "I would like to go to the hotel first. It's been a long flight, and I would like to freshen up before I meet the chief."

"Alright, what hotel will you be staying in?" Daron inquired.

"Marriot", Burke replied. "It's the closest one to the hospital".

Daron nodded and made his way towards Marriot. After 20 minutes of small talk, Daron pulled up in front of the main entrance of Marriot.

"Here you go Dr. Burke. How much time will you need?" Daron questioned.

"Hmm…It's already 8:30, I will be back in an hour. That should be more than enough time to freshen up." Burke answered.

Doran nodded and said: "I will be in the hotel parking lot. I am sure the chief gave you my cell number. If you can't find me, give me a call and I will direct you."

Burke nodded his thanks and went inside the hotel to check in while Daron made his way to the hotel parking lot.

Sure enough, after one hour Burke made his way to the hotel parking lot. Once he got there, he found the car pretty easily and headed towards it. Tapping Daron's window as to alert his presence, he opened the back door and got in the car.

"Wow Dr. Burke, right on time," Daron said, impressed by how punctual the surgeon was.

Burke laughed and said, "Yea, I pride myself on my punctuality, it was one the things Richard really liked about me."

"You were pretty close to the chief I am guessing," Daron said matter of factly. "He seemed really excited about your arrival." He finished.

Burke didn't say anything, but was very surprised to hear that. The chief had been very upset at his resignation letter, but had no choice but to let him go. He didn't agree with Burke's decision and had made that very clear. _"Just to let you know Burke, this is the biggest mistake of your life"._ These had been the last words Richard had said to him before he had left.

Before long, he saw Daron pull into the parking lot of Seattle Grace. Time seemed to have slowed down for him as he slowly got of the car to turn and face the hospital that had been his second home for more than 10 years. He couldn't believe he was back here. Taking a deep breath, he turned around to take a look at Seattle Grace Hospital after six long months. He felt a smile form on his face, as he looked at the familiar building. So much had happened in this building. It contained ten years of memories- good and bad. Slowly, he made his way to the entrance. In front of the entrance, he stopped to prepare himself for what he would see/experience one he entered inside. Richard had told him that no one except for Dr. Hahn knew that he would be coming back. So, he was pretty sure that everyone at SGH was in the dark about his arrival.

He hoped that he wouldn't bump into Christina right now. He wasn't ready to see her just yet, he didn't know if he ever would be, but he definitely wasn't today. Crossing his fingers, he stepped inside the hospital and without looking around, he headed straight towards the chief's office. He didn't want to see any familiar faces yet, not before he had met Richard at least. Surprisingly, he made it to the chief's office without bumping into anyone he knew, much to his relief. He resolved that they might be in surgery, or that their shifts would have ended. It was close to 10 after all. Stopping in front of the chief's office, he knocked lightly. The door was opened by Richard's secretary who was heading out. After exchanging greetings, she said: "The chief's been expecting you. Walk right through the door." With a nod, she left the office. Waiting for a second to collect his thoughts, he walked the couple of the feet to the chief's office, and knocked the already wide open door.

Richard looked up from the file he was reading, and a smile spread across his face when he saw who it was. Standing at the door was one of the best cardiothoracic surgeon he had worked with in all his time as a surgeon.

"Ah Preston, come on in. Have a seat." He pointed to a seat across from him, and extended his hand to Preston.

"Richard," Burke said, shaking his hand. "How are you doing?" He asked.

"Great. The hospital is thriving, and I just got one of my best surgeons back on my team, even if it is just for a week." Richard said happily, however Burke could detect a little bitterness at the last part of his sentence.

"So", he continued, "how is Boston General?"

"Oh, it's going good, I am still settling in." Burke decided to keep his response short and simple, because he wasn't exactly sure what his feeling were when it came to BGH.

Richard nodded, not pressing the subject.

Turning professional, he said: "So, I assume you got my fax about the conjoined twins' case file."

"Yea, I got it", Burke replied. "I read it on the plane, I have to say Richard, it's one hell of a surgery and I mean that in both a positive and a negative way. It's one of the most unique case the world has ever seen, but at the same time it's extremely complicated." He finished.

"You are absolutely right Preston, we can't undermine the risks of the surgery, and that is why we have three of the best cardiothoracic surgeons in the United States assigned to the case. Dr. Kurt will be arriving tomorrow morning, and we are going to start the procedure from there." Richard explained.

"How old are these kids anyways? The younger they are, the less complications there will be." Burke said.

"The kids are 2 weeks old. They are both males. The parents want the surgery to happen before they get too attached to the kids, and something goes wrong afterwards. They agreed to the surgery, because there is no way the kids will be able to survive the way they are." Richard said.

"When will I be able to see the kids?" Burke inquired.

"Tomorrow. After Dr. Kurt arrives, I will hold a meeting with Dr. Hahn, Kurt, Shephard, Sloan and you to discuss where to start from, and after that you will be able to see them."

"Why are Shephard and Sloan needed?" Burke asked confused.

"Well, many nerves are involved in the surgery, and we want a neurosurgeon at hand to make sure all the body parts are functioning properly after the surgery, and Sloan will be needed to patch up their skin after they are separated." Richard explained.

"Right", Burke said, seeing the need of Shephard and Sloan in the surgery.

"You haven't met anyone in the hospital yet?" Richard asked.

"No, I came straight here, and didn't run into anyone on the way either."

"Well, then you have pretty big tomorrow, both personally and professionally, go to your hotel and get some sleep, we need you alert and ready for tomorrow." Richard instructed.

"Alright Richard, I guess I will be seeing you tomorrow. Good night." Burke replied, getting up and making his way to the door.

"I am sure you will Preston. Oh and one more thing," Richard said, while Burke turned around to see what else Richard wanted. "It's good to have you back. Good night." And with that, he turned his attention back to his file.

Burke smiled and replied: "It's good to be back Richard." And with that he exited the office.

Coming out of Richard's office, Burke walked to the railing on the side to look down at the hospital below.

Looking around the hospital made him realize how much he missed it here. He had been at Boston for six months, but nothing there felt like home, not the way Seattle had been. Looking at the busy life of SGH, he realized with a jolt, that Seattle was his home, his only home, and Boston can never replace it. With a smile growing on his face, he realized that he was home once again.

"_There's nothing half so pleasant as coming home again." -__Margaret Elizabeth Sangste__r_

**A/N:** Whew…That was long! But I hope you guys enjoyed it! I tried to make sure my facts were correct (time differences, airports etc.) but if somethings is wrong, just point it out! O also, it is my guess that Burke's been working at SGH for 10 years. I am not really sure tho! This chapter is once again Burke-centric. He is finally back in Seattle. I hope you guys like the chapter. Thank you ALL so much for the reviews. They motivate me to keep writing, knowing that some people out there are waiting for an update! So, please please keep the reviews and ideas coming, they help me a lot. Next chapter, Burke is going to find out what's been going on at Seattle for the past 6 months. I would really want to see your ideas about this. Tell me what pairings you want, and what other stuff you would have thought had happened in Seattle ever since Burke left. Oh, I might not be updating over the weekend, but if I get a lot of reviews, I will update! So **REVIEW **


	4. Conversation with a drunken best man

Chapter 4: Conversation with a drunken best man

Derek Shepherd was depressed-for the first time in three months he was depressed to the point where the only way out was drinking himself into oblivion. Joe looked in concern as Derek threw one glass of tequila after another in his system. Derek had been coming to his bar for more than a year now, and he had never seen him drink this way. Ever.

Derek had had the worst day possible. Worse than the day he had found Addison cheating on him with his best friend. To start the day off, he had slept in, which caused him to be late to work, and didn't give him enough time to get himself coffee. He had arrived to see the death glares of nurses all over the hospital. It didn't take him long to figure why, they were all on Rose's side in their break up of course. He knew that he hadn't broken up with her in the best way possible, he could have been a little more discreet with his private life, but that relationship was really killing him, and he had to put an end to it. He couldn't believe that he had thought he would have been happy with Rose, she could give him everything he had wanted-commitment, marriage, kids- but at the end of the day she wasn't Meredith, and that was the core of all problems.

Ignoring the stares of the nurses, and the curious looks of the interns, he made his way to the board to see his surgeries for the day. He had two surgeries scheduled, and he was pleased to see that Meredith would be scrubbing in on both of them. He would have to thank Bailey later, not that she did this on purpose or anything. Finding that Meredith was his resident was the only highlight of his day, his day had been going downhill since then.

He made his way to Room 2113 to check on his first patient of the day. She was a woman in her 40s with a frontal lobe tumor, and was scheduled for surgery that day. It wasn't much long after that Meredith and her interns joined him.

"Dr. Shepherd", Meredith greeted professionally, just the way she had been saying ever since their breakup. Meredith pointed to one of her interns to start reading the chart on the patient, and Derek was surprised at the professionalism towards him. She wasn't working yesterday, but he was sure that she had heard about his and Rose's public breakup. He had seen Christina and Izzie at the scene. He didn't know what to expect, but he had certainly expected a warmer attitude towards him. Oh well, he would talk to her later.

"Dr.Shepherd", Meredith said, waving her hand in front of his face, trying to get his attention.

"Huh?" Derek said coming out of his reverie.

"What do you want me to do for the case?" Meredith questioned.

"Prep OR 2 for her surgery, we will begin in ½ an hour. You and one of your interns can scrub in." Derek answered.

Meredith nodded and turned her attention to her interns assigning them their assignments and picked George to be the intern scrubbing in the surgery. After giving the instructions, she left the room to prep for the surgery, leaving Derek behind.

The surgery had gone successfully, but Meredith had been nothing but professional throughout the whole thing. After the surgery was completed, Meredith and Derek made their way out of the OR to scrub out. Meredith was washing her hands, when Derek decided to initiate a conversation.

"So, I broke up with Rose." Derek stated, deciding to get right to the point.

"I heard, I am sorry about your break up." Meredith replied in a detached voice.

"That's it? That's all you have got to say? I am sorry?" Derek questioned shocked at her cool attitude. He had expected for her to show a little more emotion.

"Well what do you expect me to say? You are nothing more than my boss and a professional acquaintance. We don't do heart-to-heart. Have a good day Dr. Shepherd", and with that she made her way outside, leaving Derek stunned.

What was he really expecting? Meredith to just jump into her arms after he told her about his breakup. She had changed, she was much stronger now. He was foolish to think that she would just crawl back to him.

Absentmindedly, he made his way out, only to find George and Izzie talking near the nurse's station. He had no interest in their conversation that is until he heard his name pop up in the conversation.

"-Derek was there, looking at her, and Meredith was professional throughout the surgery, I was so proud of her." He heard George saying.

"Yea, Meredith had become so strong. She has no intention of going back to McBastard again, she's done with him and his crap. And, she's also been dating Neil for more than 3 weeks, and she is happy. I think she finally realized that she doesn't need Derek to make her happy." Izzie concluded.

Derek throat seemed to have closed up when he had heard that Meredith had been dating someone else. And for three weeks too. How could he have thought that she would be waiting for him, when he had finally come back to his senses? He had started dating Rose the night of their breakup, he couldn't blame Meredith, because she had waited two months. Miracles have happened to her in those two months, she came back stronger and more determined than before. She didn't do anything wrong, but that didn't stop him from feeling his heart break into a million little pieces. This was worse than Finn, because Meredith had been weak and vulnerable back then, this time she was the complete opposite. He didn't know how he managed to go through the rest of the day. He had bumped his second surgery up to another day, because he knew he was in no condition to operate. As soon as his shift was over, he headed directly to Joe's to let alcohol consume the emptiness in his body.

And that was exactly how Burke found him. After his meeting with the chief, Burke decided to head over to Joe's to see if he could find a familiar face. He needed to speak to someone before starting at SGH tomorrow. He had to know what was going on for the past 6 months he had been gone.

While everyone at SGH was very familiar with Joe's, it had not been a place Burke had visited often, only being here once on the night of his Bachelor's party. Looking around the crowded bar for a familiar face, he quickly found Derek Shepherd, who was taking glass after glass of tequila. Smiling slightly to himself, he made his way over to where his ex-best man sat, apparently trying to drown some of his sorrows.

"Derek", Burke greeted as he sat on the vacant stool next to Derek.

Derek turned his head to where he had heard his name come from, and was surprised to see the smiling face of Preston Burke. His old friend and colleague.

"Preston Burke", Derek answered in surprise.

"The one and only", Burke replied smirking.

"Even though I am so drunk right now, no one could miss the cockiness in your voice. The one that oozes the essence of Burke", Derek said drunkenly.

Preston laughed at the accusation and retaliated: "Well my voice is oozing cockiness, yours is filled with liquor. What happened to you to turn you into an alcoholic overnight, or is it an everyday thing now?" Burke questioned.

"Haha…very funny. If you had gone through the horrendous day I have gone through, you would be doing more than just heavy drinking." Derek semi-explained

"Really? What made your day so horrendous?" Burke asked in concern for his old friend.

"Hmm…let's see. I have been getting kicked in the ass the whole day for being the biggest idiot on Earth. I broke up with Meredith…" Burke sighed in understanding, but Derek waved his hand in a motion to indicate that he had more to say. "So, I broke up with her three months ago for a nurse, Rose. Then yesterday I broke up with Rose in front of the hospital. Then today, I go to the hospital to make amends with Meredith and guess what I find? I find her already dating. Dating!" Derek banged his empty glass on the table to prove his anger. "She's been dating for three weeks, and she is happy. According to Stevens, she doesn't need me to make her happy." Derek finished off miserably. Burke listened in shock as he heard Derek's woeful tale. He had missed a lot while in those six months. He tried to say something to comfort Derek, but was again shushed by Derek's hand. "And I told Mark about my problems yesterday, and you know what my so-called best friend does?" Derek paused as if waiting for an answer, while Burke realized that Mark and Derek had repaired their relationship. "He laughs. He thinks its funny, when I can't find anything funny in that situation. Just because he's been dating one woman for five weeks, without cheating on her too, he thinks he's accomplished all goals in life." Derek broke off disgustedly at the apparent cockiness of his friend.

Burke took this chance to interfere, "He's been dating ONE woman for five weeks, without cheating on her? Wow, that must be some sort of a record for him. Who's this woman that have kept Mark in line for such a long time?" Burke questioned surprised. "Erica Hahn." Derek replied dully, still lost in his own misery.

While Burke was surprised at the previous revelation, he was stunned at this one.

"Erica Hahn, the new head of cardio at the SGH? The one who used to work at Seattle Presbyterian?" Burke questioned, not believing Derek.

"The very same", looking at Burke's expression he continued, "yea, the whole hospital had the same expression when their relationship went public three weeks ago."

Six months hadn't seem that long to Burke while at Boston, but listening to Derek, Burke realized how much he had missed in those six months. He had gone to med school with Erica Hahn, and she would be the last person he would have thought to date Mark Sloan.

"Apparently Mark and Erica are the only happy people in the hospital", Derek continued, "And Meredith now, according to Izzie. The rest of us, not so happy. The chief still can't over his divorce; you know he moved in on my land, he brought his own trailer of course. Mark said we were dating. Isn't that funny? And George, well he and Callie got separated because he slept with Izzie. He still hasn't gotten over the separation, I think he still loves Callie, he just doesn't know how to approach the situation because he was the reason that their marriage failed. And then there's Izzie, she and George tried to work on a relationship, but that failed, and she has been single ever since. And who's left, o yea, Alex. I am telling you that guy is a young version of Mark. He had been romancing two women at once. The Jane Doe or Ava, the married woman and Meredith's younger half-sister Lexie. Ava was married and left town with her husband and daughter, and Lexie basically hates Alex after the way he had been two-timing her." Derek paused to catch his breath and Burke asked in wonder, "How in the world do you know all this?"

"I have been dating a nurse for the past three months that should answer your question. Well, where was I? O ya, Bailey. Her son was in an accident, and her marriage is on rocks, you wouldn't wanna piss her off, she could bite your head off. Now, the only one left is…Christina. Well she…." Derek was interrupted by Burke hastily cutting in: "Ah no, that's okay. I really don't want to know about Christina." Burke broke off awkwardly. He wasn't ready to hear that Christina was dating someone else. He knew that she wasn't waiting for him and that she would have moved on, but he didn't want to know. Not now. Not ever.

Derek seemed to understand his hesitancy, but before he could answer, he heard his cell phone ring. He looked at the caller id, flipped his phone open and said: "I'd be right there."

Looking at Burke he said, "I have to leave now, so I will see you tomorrow at work?"

"Yes, you will. But Derek, you are in no condition to drive, you can hardly see straight." Burke said, worried.

"Oh I am not driving. Mark's out there, he's driving me to the trailer. He was on a date with Erica and volunteered to pick me up from here cuz he knew I would be hammered." Derek explained.

Burke nodded and said: "Alright then, good night. I will see your hung over body tomorrow at work."

"Very funny. Night." Derek said waving his hand and making his way to the exit of the bar.

Burke watched as Derek stumbled towards the exit, and disappeared behind the doors.

Waiting for a couple of minutes to digest all the information Derek had provided him, he made his way to the exit of the bar and into the dark and wet streets of Seattle.

--

**At Cristina's apartment- 11:30 p.m**

Cristina had just came home after date with Jacob. She had just stepped in her apartment, when she heard her cell phone ring. She knew without even looking, who it was. Groaning, she flipped open her phone and said:

"What do you guys want at 11:30 at night?

"Ooo…someone's grumpy. Guess the date wasn't that good?" she heard the smirking voice of Meredith over the phone and Izzie giggling in the background.

Rolling her eyes, Cristina answered: "No, the date was…good."

"Good? Just good? That's all we get? You know we won't let you off the hook until you give us the details." Izzie replied.

"What details? We went to an Italian restaurant, we had some great food, you know he actually eats meat! Now that's a normal man. We talked a bit, and oh he was one hell of a kisser." Christina finished in an overly casual voice, knowing that it would stir a reaction from the two of them. She was not disappointed.

"Ooooo…Cristina! You kissed on the first date?" Izzie questioned excitedly.

"Psshh Izzie, I am pretty sure, he is naked in her bedroom right now." Meredith giggled.

"Oh shut up the two of you. He isn't in my bedroom right now. He said he's too gentlemanly or whatever to sleep with a woman on the first date." Christina finished.

"Oh well, I guess you have to settle for a kiss now. So, are you going on another date?" Meredith questioned.

"Maybe, we haven't really talked about it", Christina said.

"Well, don't worry Cristina, you'll get lucky very soon." Izzie said smirking.

"O shut up Barbie, anyways I am tired and I need my sleep to be awake at work tomorrow. So good night."

"Good night Christina." Meredith said.

"Sweet dreams." Izzie answered hanging up the phone.

Lying in bed that night, Cristina realized that she was finally ready to move on.

**A/N:** Wow, last chapter must have really sucked…reviews went down from 8 to 4! I know most of you guys want Christina and Burke to meet, but I have to build it up to that point. Next chapter is the one that you have been waiting for forever….they finally meet! So, I need lots and lots of reviews so that I can update the next chapter by tomorrow. Hope you liked the chapter, I added a bit about Derek, so you guys are free to hate him just like I am hating him right now for what he did to Meredith. So guys please, please, please **REVIEW!**


	5. Old Colleagues & stunning confrontations

Chapter 5: Old Colleagues and stunning confrontations

The next morning Burke arrived at the hospital just like he used to do six months ago. With a cup of coffee in his hand, he made his way to the elevators. Elevators had a very interesting history at Seattle Grace. He had been in BGH for six months, and had never heard elevator rumors that way he did here. Smirking at the thought, he turned his attention to his surroundings, and found himself in front of the elevators. It was funny that even after six months, he hadn't forgotten anything about Seattle. He was still as familiar with it as he was with his surgical tools.

Before long, he was joined by a very hung-over looking Derek Shepherd.

"Good morning", Burke greeted, smirking at his disheveled look/

Derek turned his attention to the source of the voice and was surprised to see Preston Burke standing behind him. "Burke, you are actually here! I wasn't hallucinating last night." Derek said with relief evident in his voice. When he had woken up this morning, and thought back to the bits and pieces he could remember about last night, he was sure that he had been hallucinating about Burke being there. After all, what would he be doing back in Seattle?

"Wow, were you that drunk that you thought of me as a figment of your imagination?" Burke mocked.

"O shut up, can't you see that my day has started in the worse way possible? I really don't need you rubbing it in my face" Derek snapped back.

After a moment of silence, Derek asked, "What are you doing here anyways?"

"I am here to assist on the surgery of the conjoined twins who are attached to each other from the chest. Richard called me two days ago and requested that I come here to assist with the surgery. Dr. Jason Kurt from Chicago is also arriving here for the surgery." Burke explained.

"Oh yeah, I heard about that surgery, I will be scrubbing in too, even though I haven't seen the kids yet. Nobody has. Richard said that we will have to wait until everyone was here. I guess by that he meant you and Dr. Kurt." Derek said.

The elevator opened, and Derek and Burke stepped in, Burke pushed the third floor button, because he had a meeting with the chief first.

"So, how does it feel to be back after six months? A lot has happened while you were gone." Derek stated.

"Yeah from all that you told me yesterday, I was able to gather the fact that I had missed on a lot. Apparently dating the nurse comes in with a package of three months of rumors and gossip" Burke said smirking.

Derek flushed and said hotly, "You don't know what you are talking about."

"Oh don't I? Well, let's see, you broke up with Meredith, dated a nurse for three months and you broke up with her two days ago, and now Meredith has moved on, and no longer needs you to be happy. Yup, that seems to cover it up." Burke replied sarcastically.

"Wow, I must have talked a lot last night." Derek said.

"Oh yea, you are very talkative when you are drunk. You basically told me about the lives of every doctor in this hospital." Burke filled him in, continuing he said, "But I have to say, I was most interested in how you started going out with a nurse Derek, that's low, even for your standards."

"Oh don't stand their lecturing me about my failed relationships; you are just the same if not worse when it comes to relationships. Remember the non-wedding six months ago?" Derek shot back.

"Touché," Burke said. "Well man all I have to say is that we might be world-class surgeons, but when it comes to relationships, we have no more experience than a 12-year old." And with that, he got off the elevator as it opened on the third floor, leaving a wide-eyed Derek behind.

--

Burke walked out of the chief's office 15 minutes later to see Dr. Erica Hahn, his old college competitor standing at the nurse station flipping through a file.

"Dr. Hahn", he greeted as he approached her.

"Dr. Burke", she replied when she saw who it was. "I was wondering when I would be seeing you. Richard wasn't very clear about when you would be arriving."

Before Burke could answer, he was interrupted by Mark Sloan as approached behind Erica with two cups of coffee in his hand.

"Good morning", he greeted her, not noticing Burke's presence.

"Good morning to you too. I was wondering where you were. I thought your shift started at 8." She looked down at her watch to realize that he was 30 minutes late.

"Aww…I know you missed me", he teased, kissing her playfully on the cheek. Realizing that Erica needed an explanation, he said, "I slept in, the alarm didn't go off on time, and there was a big line in the coffee shop." He said, handing her coffee to her.

"Don't blame the coffee. In fact, I was missing the coffee not you," Erica replied smirking. Realizing that Mark still hadn't noticed Burke she said, "I know you are dense Mark, but sometimes please pay attention to you surroundings. If you haven't noticed, we have a visitor." She said pointing behind him to where Burke was standing.

Turning to where Erica was pointing, Mark was surprised to see Burke standing there.

"Dr. Burke. I didn't know you were coming here." Mark said

"He's here for the conjoined twins' case", Erica explained for Burke.

"Oh", Mark exclaimed, "Well, good to have you back Dr. Burke, the hospital was a little boring without you as head of cardio," he said the last part smirking, knowing it would get a response for Erica, and sure enough, she smacked his arm with the file she was holding, giving him her most evil glare.

Burke looked in shock at the couple in front of him as if he couldn't believe his eyes. Dr. Hahn and Sloan! Not in a million years would he have thought that they would get together. After all, this was Erica Hahn we are talking about. Regaining his ability to speak, he said, "So Derek was serious when he said you guys were dating."

"Derek? When did you meet Derek?" Erica questioned confused.

"Oh, so Derek did meet with you last night at the bar. He kept on insisting that you were there, but I was sure it was the alcohol talking in him." Mark said.

"Yes, I really did meet him. He was pretty drunk, gave me the whole update of what's been going on in the hospital." Burke said.

"Yea well that's the only thing you will get when you dates a nurse," Erica replied smirking.

"Like you should be talking. How in the world did you agree to go out with Sloan?" Burke questioned.

"Hey, what's wrong with me?" Mark demanded indignantly.

"There's nothing wrong with you Sloan, it's just that, Hahn here is prone to dating. She never went on a single date during med school, claiming that she couldn't balance her personal life and studies. It's like she's against all the males or something." Burke explained to Mark.

"Hey, that's not true," Erica protested, defending herself.

"Oh really?" Mark questioned, raising his eyebrows at her. "Don't worry Dr. Burke, I know what you mean, she was attracted to me since her first day here, but it took me 4 months to get her to go on a date with me. She had the same professional-personal imbalance excuse. Pretty lame if you ask me." Mark finished.

"Aren't you supposed to be my boyfriend?" Erica asked turning her head towards Mark, but before she could continue, both her and Mark's pager went off.

Looking at hers, Erica said, "I have to take this, but this conversation isn't over Sloan." She nodded her goodbye to Burke, and made her way to the elevators.

"Now she's mad at me", Mark said smiling.

"You don't seem very worried," Burke observed.

"Nah, these little arguments and teasing is what keeps the fire in our relationship going, so no worries." Mark stated confidently, "Anyways I have to take the page, I'll see you around Burke." And with that he too made his to the elevator.

"Later Sloan", Burke said to his retreating back.

Turning around, he found the conjoined twins' case file lying where Erica had left it, deciding to look at the case history one more time, he flipped open the file and immersed himself in the details of the case.

--

While Burke was reviewing the case, Meredith and Cristina were having a one-sided conversation. Meredith wanted to talk to Cristina about something urgent, but Cristina was ignoring her, because she had to study for a unique cardio case she was scrubbing in with Dr. Hahn. It was an intense and long surgery, so Dr. Hahn picked both her and Izzie to scrub in with her, and she wanted to be prepared for anything Hahn throws at her.

On the other hand Meredith was desperately trying to get Cristina's attention. She had just found out that Dr. Burke was in Seattle Grace for a case. She knew Cristina didn't know about it, and wasn't sure how she would react to seeing him after six months after their non-wedding. She knew that Cristina would be better off if she heard of his arrival from a friend rather than seeing him herself.

"So Christina, have you heard that an old SGH surgeon is in the hospital today", Meredith started in a desperate attempt to start a conversation.

"Really? That's great." Christina replied absentmindedly, flipping through the pages of her book.

Meredith was so engrossed in trying to get Cristina to listen to her, that she didn't realize that they were nearing the nurse's station, and more importantly, she didn't notice that the doctor talking to Nurse Debbie at the nurse's station was Preston Burke, the one she had been trying to keep Cristina away from.

Before Meredith could say another word to get Cristina to listen to her, a manly laugh was heard from the Nurse's station. Cristina's head snapped up at the noise, and her body stiffened beside Meredith.

The second Cristina had heard that laugh, she knew who it belonged to. There was no way she could ever forget that laugh, deep and manly just like the person it belonged to. Preston Burke. The man who had crushed her heart, her self. She hadn't believed in love before she had met him, she was cold and detached before he came in her life, but somehow he had made her fallen in love with him only to leave her behind at the last minute. He was the first man she had let in her life, the only man she had fallen in love with, who had also turned out to be the one man that had broken her so brutally that she wasn't sure she would be able trust men again. Not the way she had trusted him at least. She had given herself to him, only to be left at the altar. Left on her own wedding day. Nobody would have thought that Cristina Yang would ever get married, but she was ready for marriage, with him she was, and he had just left. Left, leaving her broken, hurt and betrayed.

Meredith looked up to where Cristina's hard glare was pointing, and she knew at once that she was too late. Cristina had already seen Burke, and Meredith had no idea how she would react to that.

Feeling that someone was staring at the back of his head, Burke turned around from his conversation with Nurse Debbie and found his eyes locked with her dark ones, filled with confusion, hurt and mostly anger, all directed towards him. It was her. The woman who had haunted his dreams for the past six months. The love of his life. It was,

"Christina", he whispered saying her name out loud for the first time in six months.

**A/N**: Well, there we go! They finally meet…no sparks will fly though! This is just the beginning. I am not sure I did justice to the scene. I could picture it perfectly in my head, the suspense and all, but I had a hard time finding the words to explain it. Burktina reunion won't happen for a while. Burke has a lot of making up to do, but they finally meet. So, the reviews for last chapter were great and I would like to thank all of you for them! So thanks a lot! I know you want to see the aftermath of this, so click that little button and review, because the next update will be when I have received **atleast 10** reviews for this chapter. I really wanna know what you guys think.

**Also, **we have a big confrontation coming up between Burktina, a huge argument highlighting Cristina's and Burke's feelings for about their breakup. Now in the original plot, there are two average sized chapters (approx. 1500-2000 words each) before we have the argument scene, however if you want, I can combine those two chapter into one long one (approx. 3000-4000 words) and give you the argument scene after just one chapter. Your choice. Remember **10** reviews before next update. So, with that cleared up, thanks for reading and **REVIEW!**


	6. A New Arrival

Chapter 6: A new arrival

Cristina couldn't move, she couldn't speak, it felt as if her world had just stopped. And then he said it, her name, it was no more than a whisper, but she heard it as clear as day.

Before she could react, her pager started beeping jolting her out of her reverie. Looking down at her pager, she finally regained her ability to speak and turning to Meredith she sarcastically said, "So, this was the surgeon who had returned to Seattle. Thanks for the heads up Mer".

"Cristina, I tried to tell you, but you weren't listening", Meredith said defending herself.

"Yea, whatever, I have to take this," she said indicating to her pager.

Burke looked in shock as Cristina completely disregarded his presence. She was blatantly ignoring him, not giving any sign that she noticed that he was standing right across from her.

As if reading his mind, Cristina turned to look at him with a cold and stony look and said, "It's Dr. Yang to you."

And with that she turned on her heels and walked away.

Burke stood their in stunned disbelief, he couldn't get the coldness of her voice out of his head _It's Dr. Yang to you_. He had lost the privilege to call her by her first name. He didn't know what he was expecting, all he knew that it wasn't this. He was being naïve to think that she would be waiting for him, or that she would fall in his arms when she saw him and everything would be normal once again. He had forgotten that this was Cristina, nothing was ever normal with Cristina. He had left six months ago, he had left her at the altar, he hadn't even bother to say goodbye. He was the one to blame for what happened to their relationship, and he couldn't help but think that it might be too late to fix it. Cristinas's stony glare and cold voice were all the proof he needed to realize that not only was she over him, she also detested him. And there was no one to blame but himself.

But, he couldn't let her get away, he had to talk to her, he had to explain his actions, making his decision in a split second, he made to run after her, but he hadn't even taken two steps, when he felt a hand on his elbow, restraining him from moving forwards. Looking down, he saw that it was none other than Meredith Grey.

"Grey, let go of me. I need to talk to her, I need to explain", Burke snarled trying to pry her fingers off his arm.

"No, Dr. Burke, you can't talk to her. Not yet anyways. Your arrival here has been a great shock for her, and she needs space. She needs time to take in the reality of the situation. I won't let you break her again. I was there when you weren't and I had to pick up her broken pieces, I won't let you do that to her again. So no, you can't go after her, you can't talk to her, not until she is ready. You have hurt her, more than anyone has ever had, so this time you are going to wait until she's ready." Meredith said in a fierce tone. She didn't care that he was older than her, or that he used to be her boss. To her, he was the man who had broken her person, and left her to pick up the pieces.

Burke sighed, knowing that Meredith was right. There was no point in talking to Cristina right now, she wouldn't listen, and anyways by the time Grey would let go of him, she would be gone.

He nodded his head, and Meredith's grip on his arm loosened. Meredith fixed him with a cold stare, let go of his hand, and walked off the direction Cristina had headed a couple of minutes ago.

Turning back to the nurse's station, he put his head in his hands, and couldn't help but feel as if the whole world had let him down.

--

At 4 p.m the entrance doors of Seattle Grace were opened to reveal a beautiful, tall, and petite red-headed woman. She wasn't a patient, nor was she a visitor, you could tell that she was very familiar with her surroundings by the way she moved. She moved with grace across the hospital, as if she had spent a long time there and had not forgotten a minute of it. She smiled as she came across certain objects, as if they were reminding her of something special. Her smile widened as she reached the elevators. The elevators of Seattle Grace, each held its own secret romance story. It was like the elevators were romance haven for the doctors. She remembered a couple of times when she had used the elevator for romance purposes. She was still smiling at the old memories when the elevators door opened, to reveal an empty elevator. Wondering when she would see some familiar faces, she got on the elevator and pushed the level 3 button. Her first stop would be the chief's office to alert him of her arrival, and then she would go searching for her old friends and colleagues. Within seconds, the doors opened to reveal the third floor. She had just gotten off the elevator, when she saw the back of two very familiar men. Those two men had once played a very major part in her life, not anymore though. Now, they were just her two very good friends. The two were apparently in deep conversation, and didn't hear her approach behind them, not until she said, "So, how are my two favorite boys doing?"

Derek Shepherd and Mark Sloan immediately turned around at the familiar voice coming from behind them.

"Addie!" Mark said surprised to see his old friend and at one point love of his life standing in front of him with a large smile on his face.

"Addison, what are you doing here?" Derek said, after regaining himself from the shock of seeing his ex-wife again.

"Nice to see you guys too," Addison said sarcastically, laughing at the shocked expression on the men's faces.

"It is nice to see you, we missed you here," Mark said, pulling Addison into a hug. Pulling back, Addison turned to Derek who also pulled her into a hug.

"It really is good to see you Addie," Derek said, "but what are you doing here? Are you here on vacation or a case?"

"No, I am not here on vacation, Seattle isn't really ideal vacation spot, it never stops raining here." Addison complained. "So yea, I am on a case here, I am pretty sure you have heard of it. It's the case of the conjoined twins who are attached from the chest."

"Of course we've heard of it, we work here remember? Not to mention that we are the best surgeons in the hospital." Mark boasted, continuing he said, "but why do we need an OB/GYN for that case? No one is pregnant."

"I also have a degree in pediatrics Mark, I am not sure if you have noticed in the 12 years we have known each other, but I do work with little babies who are less than a year old." Addison explained sarcastically.

Derek laughed, but before Mark could say anything, Dr. Erica Hahn, made her way to Mark and said, "Chief's meeting in 20 minutes, just thought I would remind you."

"I know, my memory isn't that bad you know." Mark defended himself.

Derek chose that moment to cough which sounded a lot like, _yea right_.

"Not funny Shepherd." Mark said, glaring at his best friend.

Erica turned around to notice Addison in the group and asked, "Dr. Montgomery?"

"The one and only," Addison replied smirking, "and you must be Dr. Hahn?"

"That's correct", Erica confirmed, "It's good to finally meet you, I have heard a lot about you from many different sources." Erica smirked looking at the direction of the two men.

"If those two are the sources," Addison said pointing to Mark and Derek, "then you must have heard very little good things."

"Not really," Erica said vaguely.

"So, I heard you are the head of cardio at SGH now", Addison stated.

"And Mark's girlfriend for the past five weeks," Derek said as he watched Addison's facial expression turn into a shocked one, while Erica shot him a death glare.

"Dude, you really had to say that?" Mark groaned, looking at Addison's shocked expression, "now she's going to grill me for all the details."

Finally regaining her ability to speak, Addison choked out, "Girlfriend-five weeks?"

"Yup, that about sums it right. Everyone in the hospital had the same expression when the made their relationship public about 4 weeks ago. 5 weeks is a long time for Mark, apparently he really had a thing for Dr. Hahn here." Derek said, ignoring the glares from Erica.

"Yeah, apparently he does. Wow, Mark 5 weeks, I am proud of you. I guess we'll have to reconsider you manwhore title." Addison said thoughtfully. Addison was really surprised to hear about Mark and Erica, not because she still had feelings for Mark, but because they were the most unlikely couple on the planet. Addison had long gotten over her feelings for Mark, she was now dating a police officer in Los Angeles, and for the first time in a long time, she was truly happy. And looking at the couple in front of her, she decided that no matter how unlikely they were, they were still happy and on a second thought they did look cute together.

"You know what really surprised me, was why Dr. Hahn agreed to go out with you. I mean she's entirely way too good for you, Mark", Addison said with a teasing smile.

Erica laughed, while Mark looked at Addison with mock anger, "I'll get you back for that Satan", he said using her old nickname.

Before Addison could reply back, Mark heard his name called out from the end of the corridor, as he looked up to see Meredith Grey hurrying towards him with a file in her hand.

"Mark, there you are", Meredith said, finally approaching the group. (Meredith and Mark are friends and are on first-name basis)

"Wassup Meredith?" Mark questioned.

"Here's the file you requested a while ago, Mrs. Bitzers case history, it has her test results in it too." Meredith explained, handing over the file to Mark.

"Thanks Meredith, I was wondering when you'd bring me that." Mark stated.

"I was scrubbing in on a surgery with Dr. Bailey, so I got held up." Meredith explained.

Meredith turned around to notice, Addison Montgomery, Derek's ex-wife standing behind her. "Addison, what a surprise", she exclaimed.

"Meredith, good to see you," Addison replied pulling her into a hug.

Pulling back Meredith said, "So, are you here to assist on the conjoined twins' surgery?"

"Yes, I am. How did you guess?" Addison asked.

"Apparently all the old surgeons of Seattle Grace are coming back for this surgery, Burke's back too", Meredith said.

Suddenly, Meredith turned towards Derek and said, "Dr. Shepherd, all the nurses of SGH have been throwing me death glares all day long, can you please inform them that I had no part in you and Rose's breakup. Maybe then they'll leave me alone."

Addison not catching where the conversation was going said, "Dr. Shepherd? Nurses? Breakup? What the hell is going on here? Will someone please fill me in?"

"Oh, Derek haven't told you yet? It's been three months since we broke up and he started dating the nurse, you didn't know that?" Meredith questioned.

"No, I didn't know, I didn't know anything? So what you are saying is that you are Derek…" Addison was interrupted, as Meredith cut in and said, "-No longer a couple, yea that would be right. In fact, we haven't been a couple for the past three months. He's been dating a _nurse_," Meredith said the last part smirking.

"A nurse? A nurse Derek? That is low even for your standards?" Addison said, looking horrified at the prospect of Derek dating a nurse. She looked from Mark to Erica, looking for confirmation that Derek had indeed been dating a nurse, and they both nodded in the affirmative.

"So, let me get this straight, you dumped Meredith, the woman you ended our marriage for, the woman you claimed to be the love of your life, for a nurse?"

"Yup, that sound about right," Meredith said, before Derek could answer, "and you know what's funny? He started dating her less that 12 hours after he broke up with me. It was just like last time, when he didn't tell me he was married until you came here. He kissed a nurse, and didn't bother telling me. He even had the nerve to show me house-plans the morning after his kiss with the nurse. And you know how I found out about their kiss? George told me." Meredith ranted, with a fierce look in her eyes.

Without giving anyone a chance to speak, Meredith continued, "He said that he would wait for me forever, you know I always thought forever was a very long time, an eternity, but apparently in Derek's dictionary, forever is just six months. He waited for six months, and that was way too much for him. So, he left me for someone who was willing to give him what he wanted, marriage, house, kids and all that stuff. He left me for someone bright and shiny. Why would he want me anyways? I am dark and twisty, and I have issues, mommy issues, daddy issues, sister issues, abandonment issues. I am the epitome of all problems so he decides to leave me for someone who will fulfill his wishes. Whatever I do, is somehow wrong for him, I try to communicate more, he pulls back and tells me that he can't keep breathing for me. Then he tells me that flirting with another woman who also happens to be my half-sister was the highlight of his week." Here Meredith stopped to take a deep breath while Addison looked in disgust at Derek for doing what he did to Meredith.

Meredith knew that she had started the story, and she had to finish it, she had to take that weight off her heart and put it behind her. Turning to look at Derek right in the eye, she said, "I told you, that day you kissed your nurse, I told you that I don't want you to date other people, that I am trying to meet you halfway, that was a very big step for me, that was practically me saying that I was ready for the house, and the marriage and the kids. I just needed a little bit more time, but I was sure, I was sure that I wanted a life with you, and you know what you did, you pissed all over that."

"I showed you the house plans, you freaked out. I couldn't be around forever, and what about the whole S&M thing? That wasn't showing me any signs that you were getting ready." Derek said.

"Let's deal with one question at a time. House plans, I was surprised when you showed me the house plans, I didn't know you had them, so it took me by surprise. This was the first time I had ever gone do far in a relationship, and I didn't know how to react. That doesn't mean that I was panicked or I didn't want that, because guess what? I did. As for the S&M, we both agreed on it, to explore new possibilities, but even then, I knew that you were the one for me, and when I realized that, I approached you and told you not to date anyone but me. You are asking for a sign, that should have been a sign that I wanted to be serious with you. In a relationship, you have to meet the other person in the middle, you have to make accommodation to changes, and try to accept the other person the way they are. I was trying, I was trying really hard to become the person you wanted me to become, and I was there, I was ready, but I guess you decide that I wasn't worth it."

"Meredith, that's not true. Derek's the one who should be sorry, you didn't do anything wrong," Addison said.

"Whatever, that was all in the past now. Derek and I are over, and I have accepted that, and I have moved on. I thought that Derek was the one for me, but apparently we weren't meant to be. I am no longer the weak and pathetic Meredith who mope after every breakup, and fall back into his arms, when he decides to take me back. I have changed, I am strong and for the first time in my life, I have the ability to make my own decisions without being judged. It may come as a shock to you and your ego Derek Shepherd, but I don't need you in my life anymore. I am happy now, but the twist it that this time it isn't you that's the reason for my happiness."

Before she could say anything else, her beeper started beeping, looking at it, she turned to Addison and said, "I am sorry you had to hear all that, but I am glad I got that over my chest. It was great seeing you again Addison, I'll see you around." And with a nod to Mark and Erica she walked the other way to the elevators completely disregarding Derek. She had just walked a couple of feet when Addison called out, "Hey Meredith, does that mean that he isn't McDreamy anymore?"

Grinning, Meredith turned her head around and said, "Nope, he's a McBastard now."

**A/N:** Wow, wow wow that was long…but in my opinion this is one of the most interesting chapter so far. Thanks so much for all the reviews, they are the only reason why I posted a new chapter today. So, next chapter, Addison knocks some sense into Derek, and Burke finally is able to corner Cristina…so keep the reviews coming and if I get **10** by tomorrow, I will probably upload a new chapter by tomorrow night, otherwise you'll have to wait till Sunday or Monday, because my weekend will be busy! So, that said enjoy reading and please, please, **REVIEW!**


	7. You let yourself down

Chapter 7: You let yourself down

_Last chapter: _

"_Hey Meredith, does that mean that he isn't McDreamy anymore?" Addison called out_

_Grinning, Meredith turned her head around and said, "Nope, he's a McBastard now."_

_--_

Mark laughed out loud at Meredith's words, but was immediately silenced by the death glare sent to him by Derek.

The four of them stood in an awkward silence for a minute. Addison was glaring at Derek, Derek was suddenly very interested in his shoes, and Mark and Erica didn't know what to do.

Suddenly Erica looked at her watched and said, "Oh look, there's only ten minutes left for the chief's meeting we should be going."

Mark nodded enthusiastically, relieved to get away from the awkward situation. The two of them made their way to the chief's office, but before Derek could follow them, Addison grabbed his elbow, and said, "We'll be there in 5 minutes, Derek and I have some unfinished business to attend." And with that, she dragged Derek to the nearest on-call room and locked the door behind them.

"By unfinished business, did you mean sex?" Derek questioned trying to lighten the mood, however one look on Addison's face and he knew that it was the wrong thing to say.

"Do you seriously find this situation funny Derek?" Addison hissed, "You know why we are here, so would you mind telling what exactly happened, that you felt the need to date a nurse."

"Look Addie, I was tired of waiting for her, someday she would let me in, and on others she would completely cut me out. It's true that she tried communicating and I was distracted, but it's always me. I am the one, who's always waiting, and I was tired of it, I wanted a break, I wanted to try out new possibilities, I wanted commitment, and I thought that Meredith wasn't ready to give me what I wanted." Derek tried to explain.

Addison was looking at Derek with a mixture of shock and disbelief.

"And the nurse was ready to give you all that?" she asked.

"Well, she was, but then I realized that she wasn't.." Derek said, but was cut off as Addison interrupted sarcastically, "She wasn't what Derek? She wasn't Meredith?"

"Well yea," Derek mumbled.

"I don't believe you Derek Shepherd. I was married to you for 11 years, and I still fail to understand you. You tell me that you waited, six months isn't waiting. Meredith has issues, I know that, you know that, hell the whole hospital knows that. She didn't have any example at how relationships work. Her parents were divorced, and she never received love from Ellis. You can't blame her for being hesitant and unsure of what she wanted. Like she said earlier, this was the first time she had come this far with a guy, and she needed time to adjust to that. Because so far from all the examples she's being seeing around her, the only thing she is realizing that true love doesn't exist and there's no happy ending. And her fears were confirmed, when her best friend was left at the altar by the love of her life. You claim to love her, and you couldn't give her enough space so that she could bounce back and be ready to resume a relationship with you. I don't know what S&M was, the one you mentioned earlier, but what I could pick up was that you wanted more out of relationship with Meredith, you wanted commitment and marriage and kids, and you thought she wasn't ready to give it to you, and so you decide to go kiss a nurse. That's probably the stupidest thing I have heard of. You claim to kiss the nurse because Meredith wasn't ready to commit. Well Derek Shepherd I believe you to be a liar, because if commitment and marriage were enough for you, we would have never gotten divorced. We had commitment in our relationships, we were married, but we didn't work out. You fell in love with Meredith, and that kind of bond you guys shared was different. In our 11 years of marriage you haven't loved me the way you loved her. And just when things get tough in your relationship, you run. You say that Meredith was the reason why your relationship didn't work? Well, I say different. I believe that it was your fault. You don't run away from things when they get difficult, you be a man and face the problem, and that's how they are solved, not by running away in the different direction and taking refuge in the first thing you see, which in this case was Rose. I told you not to hurt her again didn't I? Addison lecture was interrupted by Derek, who said, "I know I let you down Addie."

Addison looked at him with a mingled look of pity and anger, and said, "You didn't let me down Derek, hell you didn't even let Meredith down, you let yourself down, and this time it will be very hard to get up again." And with that Addison unlocked the door and made her way to the chief's office, leaving Derek stunned.

--

Addison arrived at the chief's office 3 minutes before the meeting was supposed to start. Richard, Mark, Erica, Preston and an unfamiliar figure were already present.

Richard looked up when Addison came in, and immediately got up to greet her.

"Addison, it's so great to see you again," Richard said hugging his old student and colleague.

"You too Richard, in fact it's great to be back. Apparently a lot has happened since I left six months ago." Addison said.

"Ah, I can assume that you have already met some of your old friends here." Richard stated.

"Yeah, I bumped into them on my way here," Addison replied glancing at Mark and Derek, who had just entered the room.

"Very well, now that we are all here, why don't you all take a seat, and we'll start the meeting." Richard instructed.

Richard took his seat at the head of the table, Addison sat to the left of him, followed by Erica, Mark and Derek. Burke and Dr. Kurt were sitting across from them.

Once everyone was seated, Richard started speaking, "Well, we'll start with the introductions. This shouldn't take that long since all of you here with the exception of Dr. Kurt know each other. Dr. Hahn, even though you weren't working here when Dr. Burke and Montgomery were, I am pretty sure you know them." Erica nodded her head in the affirmative, and Richard continued, "Here to the right of me is Dr. Jason Kurt, he's one of the best cardio surgeons on the east coast, and he will be here to assist on the conjoined twins' surgery."

"He isn't really bad to look at", Addison whispered to Erica, as she checked Dr. Kurt out.

"Not at all", Erica muttered back, eyeing Dr. Kurt too.

"He's not all that good", Mark snapped looking how Erica was eyeing Dr. Kurt.

"You are just jealous", Erica smirked, turning her attention back to Richard as he started speaking again.

"So, basically the purpose of this meeting was to make the introductions and then go examine the twins, however before we can do that, I need a list of the residents who would be scrubbing in on the surgery. Dr. Hahn, Sloan, Shepherd and Montgomery, each of you will pick a resident who is interested in you field who will be scrubbing in on the surgery. Once I have the list, I will give it Dr. Bailey who will announce it to the residents. Any questions?" Richard asked looking around the group.

When none of them said anything, he continued, "Okay, so we start with you Dr. Hahn, since the surgery is mostly related to cardio, you get to pick first." Richard looked up to see Dr. Hahn as she made her decision.

"Yang", Erica answered.

"What?" Mark, Derek and Richard asked in surprise.

"Yang, as in Cristina Yang?" Richard asked in surprise. He had heard all about how Dr. Hahn seemed to hate Christina and wouldn't let her scrub in her surgeries, and was very surprised that she would want her as her resident.

"What? Is there more than one resident with the name of Yang?" Erica asked irritated by the looks of surprise on the faces of her colleagues.

"Um no. It's just that you don't seem to like Dr. Yang that much, so we were surprised. That's all." Richard tried to explain.

"Just like I don't let Yang scrub in all my cardio surgeries like Burke used to, doesn't mean I have something against her. She's not the only resident wanting to specialize in cardio, and the others deserve a chance to get some experience. However in a high magnitude case like this, we need the resident who's the best, and that's Yang", Erica said simply.

Burke couldn't help but feel proud at Dr. Hahn's words. Cristina was the best. He had trained her to be the best. If there was anything he was proud of, was how much Cristina had learned from him, and how that experience would take her to become one the best cardio surgeon in the US. With her experience, hard work, and determination, left no doubt in Burke's mind that she would go to great heights.

"Alright," Richard nodded understanding, turning to Addison he said, "What about you Addison? You have been gone for six months, but I am sure you remember everyone here in order to make your selection."

"Yes I do, and from that experience, I am going to pick Dr. Stevens." Addison answered.

Nodding, Richard turned to Mark, and said, "What about you Sloan?"

"I would have to go with Karev", Mark answered, ignoring the surprised looks of Addison, Erica and Derek.

"Finally, Shepherd, who do you pick?" Richard asked in a tone that said that he knew just who Derek would pick, and he wasn't disappointed. Without waiting for a second, Derek answered, "Mer- I mean Dr. Grey."

Richard gave Derek an unsure look, but wrote Meredith's name on the list anyways.

"Alright, now that we have that covered, we are going to meet the kids. They are in the back room. Oh, and you should probably prepare yourself, it's not a very pretty sight." Richard cautioned.

Richard led the doctors to the back room and opened the door. It didn't matter how cold and detached the surgeons were, nothing could have prepared them for the scene they witnessed behind the doors. In their 10 years of being surgeons, they had never seen anything like this except for in pictures.

The babies were no more than 2 weeks old, and were conjoined right from their chests. Just from one look at the kids, they knew that this would be one hell of a surgery, but the surgery would have to happen if the kids had any chance to survive. Judging from their condition, they would be lucky to live to see the next month.

--

3 HOURS LATER

Addison, Derek, Erica, Mark, Burke and Kurt had spent the last three hours examining the twins, looking through their test results and discussing what their next step should be. It was 7:30 by the time the doctors made their way out of Richard's office. Richard went to give the chosen residents list to Dr. Bailey, Erica was paged, and left to check on her patient, while Mark, Derek and Kurt were making small talk as they made their way out of the office.

Having nothing to do, Burke slowly made his way out of the chief's office. Once outside, he found the corridors to be deserted. Looking around, he saw a figure standing at the end of the corridor. On a closer look, he realized that it was Cristina. She was leaning against the wall, immersed in a book she was reading.

Burke knew that this was the golden opportunity to speak to her. Her friends weren't around, nor were any other hospital staff, not to mention that she was standing two feet away from an on-call room, which would a perfect place for them to talk. Quickly making up his mind, Burke made his way towards Cristina, praying that she doesn't notice him until he was right in front of her, because otherwise she would run away before he had the chance to even open his mouth.

Luck seemed to be on his side, because Cristina was so immersed in her book, that she didn't notice him until he was right in front of her.

"Dr. Yang", Burke greeted, calling her by her last name like she had wanted him to do. At this point, he didn't want to piss her off because it might be his only chance to talk to her.

Startled, Cristina looked up to see Burke standing directly in front of her. Snapping her book shut, Cristina made to turn away, but Burke reacted before she could take even one step away from him. Grabbing her from the elbow, he quickly led her to the on-call room. Glad to find that it vacant, he led her inside, and before Cristina could make a single noise, locked the door behind them. Trying to get his hand off her arm, Cristina glared at him and snarled, "What the hell do you thing you're doing Dr. Burke?"

Looking at her, Burke simply answered, "I think we need to talk."

--

**A/N:** Hey guys... I have a couple of things to say, so bear with me. One, I am so sorry for the delay, my internet wasn't working and I couldn't update over the weekend, So I am really sorry about that. Second, thank you so so so so much for all the reviews. 20 reviews for the last chapter, you guys totally made my day, Shonda should totally bring back Addie to the show! Third, the next chapter will be the big fight/confrontation between our favorite characters. However, I have a super busy week coming up, so that next chapter will be updated once I get **10** reviews for the chapter. So, keep the reviews coming and if I get **10** by tomorrow, I will do my best to update. Lastly, Jacob Nelson (the guy Cristina is dating) is not out of the picture, he will come back to stir up so more drama in the next couple of chapter. With that said, please enjoy the chapter, and please, please **REVIEW!**


	8. Your'e too late

Chapter 8: You're too late

_Last chapter:_

"_What the hell do you thing you're doing Dr. Burke?" Cristina snarled glaring at Burke._

_Looking at her, Burke simply answered, "I think we need to talk."_

--

Cristina stared at Burke with utter disbelief and anger. "Do you seriously think that I want to talk to you, or that I would let you talk to me?" Cristina questioned incredulously. "Now, get out of my way, I don't have time for your crap", Cristina tried to push him away from the door so that she could leave, but Burke won't budge. Trying to gain eye contact he pleaded, "Cristina please, just give me a chance to explain."

Cristina broke in, "A chance to explain? I don't think so. There's nothing to explain. You led me on, you left me at the altar, there's nothing left to explain", she finished with a bitter laugh.

"I know what I did was unforgivable, but please let me a minute to explain. The faster you let me explain the faster you can leave", Burke said in a hopeful voice.

Cristina knew that he wouldn't let her out until he got to say what he wanted, so looking up at him, she snapped, "Okay, you want to talk, then talk. You have one minute. Your time starts now."

"I didn't mean one minute literally Cristina", Burke said agitated.

"The time's ticking", Cristina simply replied.

Burke knew he would not win in this situation, and the best thing would be for him to start talking without any more arguments.

"Okay, first of all, I want to tell you how sorry I am, for doing what I did, for not coming back, for everything, I am so sorry", but before Burke could say anything else, Cristina broke in once again, "You're sorry? You're sorry? You seriously have the nerve to come up to me and say that you're sorry for what you did, as if sorry can change everything, as if that one damn word could wipe away the months of hurt and sadness I endured. You really are delusional Preston Burke."

Burke made to interrupt, but Cristina beat him to it, "No, let me say this. You wanted to talk right, so I am doing my part of the talking. I am going to let everything out. All the hurt and sadness you cause me, I am going to let go of it. I am finally going to close your chapter from my life." Cristina ranted.

"So, let's start from the beginning shall we? You left me at the altar, you never came back to say good bye, you didn't give a damn about anyone's feelings but yours. You didn't realize that your betrayal would hurt me. You didn't realize that you leaving me on our wedding day would break the almighty Cristina Yang. But how could you have realized? After all I am Cristina Yang. I don't have feelings, I don't believe in love, or marriage or a happy ending. How would you realize how much you were hurting me?" Cristina broke of, trying to keep her tears on bay. She didn't want to show any signs of weakness, especially not in front of Burke.

Burke took this moment to start talking, "Of course I knew that it would hurt you, but I thought I was doing the right thing for us in the long run. We were too different Cristina," Burke tried to explain, the same thing he had been trying to explain to himself for the past six months: _Why he left Cristina at the altar_.

Christina was angry at hearing his words, "We were too different? You realized on our wedding day that we were too different? Burke you knew that we were different from the day we started dating each other. You're spiritual, I am not. I eat meat, you don't. You're a neat freak, I'm not. We have different beliefs, different ideas, and a different perception towards life. We were two completely different people, and it was apparent from day one. Are you seriously telling me that you didn't realize how different we were till the day of or wedding? You were the most committed man I know, and that was the reason that I accepted your proposal. On the other hand, I lacked commitment, half the hospital including my best friend believed that I would bail on the wedding. But guess what? I was ready, I had finally come to terms with the fact that I was marrying you, and you bailed, you left, you got cold-feet. None of this was my fault. It wasn't my fault that you started dating, it wasn't my fault when you asked me to move in with you, it wasn't my fault that you proposed to me, and it certainly wasn't my fault that you didn't find me good enough for you to leave me at the altar. However, one thing was my fault. That one mistake I made nearly ruined my life. And you know what that mistake was? Falling in love with you. That's right. I am pretty sure you didn't believe that, but I was in love with you, and that was the biggest mistake I have ever made in my life."

Burke's heart broke into a million pieces at Cristina's words, but didn't say anything, because he knew Cristina had more to say, and sure enough a moment later she started again, "All my life I have been cold, detached, unfeeling and most of all, I had never let a person get close to me…"

Burke chose this moment to interrupt, "Correct me if I am wrong Cristina, but you dated Colin Marlow for 3 years, that accounts for letting a person get so close to you."

If Cristina was angry before, now she was livid. "Colin Marlow? You have the nerve to bring up fricking Colin Marlow. You know that I dated Marlow for three years, so you should also know that he proposed to me many times, but I refused, every single time. I refused. But you, I dated you for less than a year before accepting your marriage proposal, Does that seem like a sign to you? The fact that in that year that we were dating, I had become a completely different person. All through med school I was the top student, completely detached and cold to everyone. I didn't believe in love, I didn't believe in marriage. But that all changed when I started my internship here and met you. That was the downfall of my life. We started with sex, and I ended up pregnant. You leave me before I could tell you, because being the chief was more important to you. I had a miscarriage, and you weren't there. I don't blame you, because you didn't know. Then, later that night you comforted me while I was at my wits ends, and that's when I realized how much you meant to me. I am not the person who does all this dating and getting to know each other crap. This was new to me, I had no idea what to do, but I knew that I wanted you, and that's why we decided to give us a chance. Next, we went on our date, our differences were very obvious from the very different, yet I let you in my life. Then, you asked me to move in with you, I was so double-minded, but yet once again I gave way to your wishes, because I loved you. Then you propose, that was the biggest shocker in my entire life. Throughout my entire life, I had always believed that marriage was overrated, it was for the weak, I always thought that I would never get married. And still, I accepted your proposal. I asked you for a simple wedding, just me and you in city hall, but you end up calling our moms to help plan a big wedding. I was upset, but I agreed, because I knew that it was one day that I could go against my wishes to make you happy, and we had our whole life ahead of us for you to make it up to me. Just think for one minute Burke, just think of all the changes I made for you. I changed everything I was for you, and the you decide that I am still not good enough for you, and you leave me. Just when I am ready to commit, to give myself to you, you decide to leave. Tell me what did I do wrong Burke. Tell me", Cristina said desperately, trying to understand where she had failed in their relationship.

"It wasn't you Cristina. It had nothing to do with you", Burke said, trying to take everything Cristina had said in. He didn't realize how much he had hurt her. He didn't realize that she might be hurting, and that she really loved him. He was so blinded by his own pain that he didn't realize that Cristina might be going through the same thing.

"Then why Burke? I need to know", Cristina demanded.

"I thought you weren't happy. I thought you didn't want all of this, the wedding and all. You had changed so much, that I thought you were losing yourself in the process. I didn't want you to regret our marriage years in the future. Marriage is forever, I don't believe in divorce, and I wanted you to be happy." Burke explained, feeling a lump for in his throat.

"Wow, I don't believe this. You thought I wasn't happy? Are you seriously kidding me? I was with you for one whole year. I accepted your proposal. I am not the kind of person who stays with a guy for pity or because I feel sorry for them. You of all people should know that. If I didn't love you, I would have broken up with you a long time. I would have never agreed to marry you. I admit that I allowed to have the wedding the way you wanted, because like I said earlier, I thought we had our whole fricking lives in front of us, for you to make it up to me. How was I supposed to know that you were going to just leave me hanging there, without any explanation? In a relationship, you are supposed to deal with the other person's shortcomings, and change yourself a little to please the other person. That's what commitment is about, isn't it? Who would guess that Cristina Yang was more committed to the relationship then Preston Burke? Who would have thought that Preston Burke was just stringing me along? To just get in my heart and then leave me at the worst moment. All alone, broken and without anyone to hold on to. I don't know what I would have done if my friends weren't there for me. I trusted you, and you pissed all over it. You don't know what it feels like to tell your friends everyday that you are over your ass of an ex-fiancé, but tossing and turning all night because you can't sleep without his arms around you. Do you have any idea how much you have hurt me Burke?" Christina questioned, finally letting a couple of tears from her eyes.

Burke nearly lost all his self-control when he saw the state Cristina was in, he knew that it was all his fault, he also knew that there was nothing he could do to take away the past six months and all the hurt and pain she went through in that time, he couldn't think of anything to say but, "I am so sorry Cristina. I am so, so sorry. I love you so, so much. I never stopped. I am so sorry."

Composing herself, Cristina said, "Sorry can't do anything Burke. It can't take away the past six months. It can't lessen the pain and hurt I went through. That word doesn't change anything. And don't you dare tell me that you love me, you have no right to come here and say this six months after you deserted me. I don't love you. In fact I detest you for what you did to me. I detest you for how you broke me, how you make me so vulnerable. I detest you for everything you put me through. But I don't care. Not anymore, You mean nothing to me. We are done. There's no more us. I needed to get all these pent up feelings out, so that I can move forward with my life. Our chapter is over. There is no more 'us', and there never will be an 'us' again. I have let you go, and I have moved on with my life. I don't need or want you in my life anymore Burke. It's over, it's been over." And with that, Cristina pushed Burke out of her way, unlocked the door and walked out slamming the door behind her. Burke was left in utter darkness, he finally let go of his emotion he had been holding up for so long. As he felt the first tear fall from his eyes, he couldn't help but feel his world collapse all around him.

**A/N:** Wow, this was it. The big chapter. I seriously hope I did justice to this. I wanted this chapter to address all of Cristina's emotions and all the pain she went through when Burke left her. I was not planning to post up this chapter today, but I got 13 reviews for the last chapter, and I promised that I would update after 10, so here you go. I really, really hope that you liked this chapter, because I spent a lot of time on this, to make sure it comes out to be perfect. So, this time instead of 10 reviews, I am going to update at **15**, because I really want to know what you guys thought about this chapter. I really hope that I didn't disappoint anyone. So, with that said, hope you enjoyed the chapter, and please, please, please **REVIEW!**


	9. I need to talk to you

Chapter 9: I need to talk to you

Cristina walked out of the on-call room, her mind reeling from what just happened inside. She couldn't believe that she had said those things to him. She had promised herself that she would never express any emotions about what had had happened with Burke and her. However, there was something about Burke that made her open up to him. And that's exactly what had happened in the on-call room, she had ended up spilling up everything to him. However, she had to admit that she felt much lighter now that everything was out in the open.

She had just walked a couple of feet, when she felt her pager beeping. Looking down, she saw that it was Dr. Bailey. Wondering what Bailey needed at this time, she quickly made her way to the conference room where she was supposed to meet her.

Arriving in front on the conference, she walked in, and saw that Izzie, Alex and Meredith were already in there. Even more confused at to what was happening, she made her way to an empty seat next to Alex and waited to Dr. Bailey to arrive. Less than a minute later, Dr. Bailey arrived with a sheet of paper in her hand.

She made her way to the head of the table, looking up at the confused looks on her residents' face, she said, "Alright, I am sure you are wondering why you all are here", seeing the residents' nod their heads, she continued, "I am pretty sure that you all have heard about the conjoined twins surgery that will be taking place in SGH. All of our attendings are participating in the surgery, and no matter how many years of experience they have had, it appears that they can't survive without the residents' assistance. Here in my hand, is the list the chief has passed on to me. On this list, are the names of the residents' who the attendings have picked from their fields, who will be assisting them in the surgery."

Dr. Bailey paused scan the list herself first, and then spoke,

"Dr. Hahn, Cardio- Resident: Cristina Yang", the second Bailey said her name, Cristina looked up in stunned disbelief. "Dr. Hahn picked me, are you serious?" Cristina gasped.

"I am pretty sure you are the only Cristina Yang in hospital, so yea, she picked you." Dr. Bailey answered, smiling slightly at the surprised look on Cristina's face.

She continued saying, "Dr. Montgomery, Neo-natal- Resident: Izzie Stevens." Looking at the confused looks on the faces of the four doctors, she explained, "Yes, Dr. Montgomery is here to assist on the surgery along with Dr. Burke and Dr. Kurt."

"Next, Dr. Sloan, Plastics- Resident: Alex Karev", she paused, as Alex blew a low whistle, looking extremely shocked that Dr. Sloan would pick him as his resident, since he didn't seem very taken with him from the beginning. He was jolted back to reality as Dr. Bailey started speaking again.

"Lastly, Dr. Shepherd, Neuro- Resident: Meredith Grey." Meredith knew that it would be her, after all she was the only resident left who hadn't been picked so far. She really wasn't happy to be paired with Derek. She didn't want to be in his company longer than what was absolutely necessary, and now with that case, they would practically be together for the whole week, till the surgery is done.

Bailey stared sympathetically at a disgruntled Meredith. She knew that Meredith didn't want to be paired with Derek, and she couldn't blame her. However there was nothing she could do to make the situation better for her, Meredith will have to work with Derek. All Bailey hoped, was that she remains strong over the next week just like she had been over the past three months. Noticing that she has one more announcement to make, she turned towards her residents' once again, and said, "There will be no switching of residents to other attendings, the attendings have chosen you and you have no say but to do as they tell you to. Got it?" The four of them nodded, and Bailey continued, "There is a meeting you will be attending tomorrow at 4:00 p.m with your attending to work on the case. I will make sure that you all are free for that one hour, so that there are no distractions. Now, are there any questions?" When nobody said anything, Bailey quickly nodded her head and said, "Well in that case, you are dismissed." And with that, all the four residents left the room.

Cristina was so happy to be picked as the resident for cardio, that she almost forgot about her fight with Burke. "O yea, Hahn picked me. Me. Cristina Yang. Cardio goddess. I have been telling you all along that I am the cardio goddess, and now Dr. Hahn knows it too." Cristina gloated with a happy smile on her face.

"Dude, Sloan picked me. You know how cool that is? I guess he finally realized that I have great potential for plastics." Alex boasted alongside Cristina.

"Oh shut up you two," Meredith snapped, still in a grumpy mood for being paired with Derek.

"Mer, don't let McBastard bring you down, you are much stronger and determined now. A week in his company won't kill you. You'll be fine." Izzie said comfortingly.

"Yea, I guess you're right Iz, I'll survive. He can't bring me down, not anymore," Meredith said with great determination, "Oh, and congrats for being chosen for neo-natal."

Izzie beamed happily at Meredith. She was really glad at being chosen by Addison. She knew she'd have a great time with her.

Coming off her high, Cristina once again started to feel the after-affects of her fight with Burke. She wanted to tell someone about it, before all the drama eats her up from the inside. Turning to the only person she knew she could tell anything, Cristina said, "Hey Mer.." However she was cut off by Meredith's beeper beeping. Looking down at it Meredith exclaimed, "Dang, I gotta go, I was in a surgery with Dr. Hahn when Dr. Bailey got paged. I need to go back." And with that she sprinted towards the ORs.

"Yea, I gotta go too, I was doing post-op for Dr. Bailey, and I am still not finished," Izzie signed, as she made her way to the nurse's station.

Sighing, Cristina decided to go to the galleries to watch a surgery while she waited for Meredith to be done with her shift.

--

1 HOUR LATER

Cristina was aimlessly walking near the entrance of Seattle Grace. The surgery she was watching had ended 15 minutes ago, and she had nothing to do. She was waiting for Meredith. She didn't know when Meredith's surgery was going to end, but she was determined to wait until she was done, because she needed to talk to her. Her fight with Burke was crushing her, and she needed to talk to someone about it. At this point, she was even ready to talk to Izzie, she just needed a friend, and Izzie had proved herself to be trustworthy in the past.

But so far, Cristina had seen neither of them, and she was getting very impatient. The entrance hall was very quiet since it was already 10 at night, and the only doctors left in the hospital were those who were on-call and the ones whose surgeries had been extended.

After a couple of minutes, Cristina saw Dr. Hahn getting out of the elevator dressed in her street clothes. This obviously meant that the surgery was over, and Meredith should be arriving soon.

As she watched, Dr. Hahn stopped at the reception desk, apparently waiting for someone. After a couple of seconds, Cristina hesitantly made her way toward her. Stopping a couple of feet away from her, she cleared her throat, trying to get her attention. Sure enough, Dr. Hahn looked up from the file she was reading. She started quizzically at Cristina wondering what she was doing there. "Um, Dr. Hahn, I would like to, um, thank you, for choosing me as your resident for the surgery," Cristina said in a rush, before she could change her mind. Dr. Hahn looked at her oddly for a couple of seconds before saying, "Well, don't let it get to you head Yang." Her voice was reserved as usual, but Cristina could have sworn that there was a small smile playing on the doctor's lips.

With a smile, Cristina replied, "I won't", and turned to walk away to continue with her pacing.

She had only gone a couple of steps, when she heard Mark's voice from behind her, curiosity getting the better of her, she turned to see Mark approaching Erica with a smile on his face.

"You waited," he said, kissing her on the cheek.

"I told you I would, and I don't tend to break my promises. Not to mention that my surgery just ended a couple of minutes ago. Grey is doing the post-ops or it would have taken even longer." Erica explained.

"Ah, see I knew there was a catch. There was no way that you would stay an hour after your shift ended just to wait for me. There had to be a surgery involved," Mark joked.

"Oh shut up," Erica smirked, smacking him on the arm, "So, you ready to go?"

"Yup, all ready", Mark replied.

Cristina stared as Erica and Mark made their way to the exit of the hospital. She saw Mark put her arms around Erica, as they made their way out. She was Erica put her head on Mark's shoulder, as they made their way to their car.

As Cristina started at the happy couple walking out of the hospital, she couldn't help but sigh wistfully. They reminded her of her relationship with Burke. They reminded of her of how Burke used to wrap her arms around her waist when they would leave the hospital together, and how she would rest her head on his shoulder. Seeing the closeness between the two attendings, she couldn't wish but think that she could relive the moments when she and Burke were together and happy. She hated herself for not have gotten over Burke even after six months, but what she shared with Burke was special, and it couldn't be destroyed so easily, she just didn't think that seeing him once again would hurt so much.

Wiping a couple of stray tears that had escaped from her eyes, she decided to go to the nurse's station to look for Meredith. From what Dr. Hahn had said, she was doing post-op notes, so she had to be there.

She quickly got on the elevator and pushed the third floor button. The second she had gotten off the elevator on the third floor, she saw Meredith and Izzie standing at the nurse's station, laughing at something that Izzie had just said.

She made her way to the two of them, and stopped in front of Meredith.

"Cristina what are you still doing here? We thought you had already left. You shift ended hours ago," Meredith said in surprise.

"Are you done with these post-ops?" Cristina asked not bothering to answer her question.

"Yea, Izzie and I just finished, we were going to the locker room to change and then go home." Meredith answered.

"I need to talk to you. You too Izzie. It's important, and it can't wait until tomorrow," Cristina said desperately.

"What's up Cristina?" Meredith asked, concerned at the desperateness in her friend's voice.

"No questions Mer, not yet. I need to talk first, but not here, and not at Joe's. We need to go to your house. Just get dressed." Cristina said vaguely.

Meredith and Izzie looked extremely confused, but decided not to ask questions just yet. They could tell that Cristina was really distressed, so without a word the three made their way to the locker room to change in their street clothes.

The whole time, Cristina had been oddly quiet, but while they were walking to the car, she questioned, "Hey Mer, is their tequila at your place. I have a feeling that I will be needing a lot of it tonight."

By now Meredith was burning with curiosity, but decided not to ask questions for Cristina's sake. Instead, she said, "Yes we do, Izzie just bought 3 bottles yesterday."

Cristina nodded, as the three got in the car, and drove in silence to Meredith's house.

20 minutes later, Meredith parked the car in front of her house, and the three made their way inside. The second Meredith had locked the door behind her, she turned to Cristina and said, "Spill".

**A/N**: Well, here's another one. I am sorry for the delay, but right now I am just swamped with work. So, a couple of things: One, thank you all once again for all the great reviews, you guys are my inspiration to keep writing. So, keep it up. Two, I know this a dry/filler chapter, but it had to be written. It wasn't as dramatic as the last one, but please review all the same, because the next chapter is both Cristina and Burke's POV of the after math of their confrontation. So, for the next chapter to be posted, I need at least **10** reviews. So, whenever I get **10 **reviews, new chapter will be uploaded so keep reviewing. Third, I am really sorry if I make any mistakes regarding the history of the characters, I try very hard to keep it canon, but sometimes my information can get a bit faulty. With that said, enjoy the chapter, and please, please, please **REVIEW!**


	10. I don’t need him I love her

Chapter 10: I don't need him; I love her

_Last chapter:_

_The second Meredith had locked the door behind her, she turned to Cristina and said, "Spill"._

_--_

Looking at Izzie's curious face and Meredith's questioning one she smirked slightly to herself and said, "Well, before I start, I need the bottle of tequila you promised Meredith."

Meredith scowled at Cristina. "You really can't make the situation anymore suspenseful can you Cristina?" she snapped.

While 30 minutes ago Cristina was dying to let everything out to Meredith, but now that she was standing in her living room, she was enjoying building up the suspense for Meredith and Izzie.

"Well, you told me that you had tequila, and I can't relate the story without tequila for my company," Cristina said innocently.

Meredith opened her mouth to reply, but Izzie stopped her saying, "Just get her the tequila Mer, the longer you delay bringing it to her, the longer we'll have to wait for her story."

Knowing that Izzie was right, Meredith hurriedly went into the kitchen to get two bottles of tequila. One for Cristina and the other one for Izzie and her.

Coming back to the living room, she found Cristina making herself comfortable on the couch, while Izzie sat on the loveseat across from her. Handing Cristina her bottle of tequila, she poured one glass for her and Izzie from the other bottle and took a seat on the armchair next to the fireplace right across from where Cristina was sitting.

Cristina took her sweet time getting comfortable. She stretched her legs, then slowly uncorking the cap of the tequila bottle, she took s few sips from the bottle, stopping for a couple of seconds between each sip. She was thoroughly enjoying the agitated looks on the faces of Meredith and Izzie, when they realized that she was purposely acting so slowly. For Cristina however, keeping the two in suspense was turning out to be her new favorite pastime.

When Cristina didn't start speaking after a couple of minutes, Meredith had had enough. Getting up from her armchair, she made her way to where Cristina was sitting. Lowering herself until she was eye-level with Cristina, she snarled, "Are you planning to speak anytime soon? Because this is really a waste of my time. So, if you don't start speaking in 10 seconds, I am going to go up to my room or even better, I will kick you out."

Cristina smirked and said, "Chill Mer, honestly I thought Barbie would be the one to crack first". Glancing up at Meredith, she saw that she didn't look pleased. She sighed knowing that she couldn't drag this any longer. She had to say it, explain everything that had happened, and then maybe she will be able to completely move on from her past. She was hoping that this whole confessing thing would be her closure from the past, from her failed relationship, from Burke.

Nodding her head in determination, she turned towards Meredith and Izzie and started, "Okay, you guys know that I don't do all this sharing and confessing crap, so this is really out of character for me. But, I think that it might help me move on from my past, and honestly I am willing to do anything if the result of it would be freedom from my failed relationship with Burke. I am going to tell you everything, and you will not interrupt. Not with sound effects, or your comments. This is hard enough already without you guys interrupting every ten seconds. So, no interrupting until I am finished letting everything out. Got it?" Seeing Meredith and Izzie nod, she continued, "Today, after the meeting with the chief, Burke managed to corner me. I was very inappropriately standing very close to an on-call room, and he used that to his advantage. He took me in, locked the door and said that we needed to talk. I showed no interest in talking to him, but he wouldn't budge until I gave him a chance to speak. I told him that he had one minute, and he started off by saying that he was sorry. Would you believe his nerve? He said he was extremely sorry for what he did, and what he put me through. He said that one damn word as if by saying it everything would be ok. As if that word will take away the past six months and all the hurt and pain I went through in that time. He thought that just because he said sorry everything would be alright and that I would forgive him and we'd get back together. You should know how it feels Meredith, didn't Shepherd do the same thing to you, not once but twice. These goddamn men, they think that they can hurt us in anyway they want, and when they realize that they made a mistake, they come back to us, say sorry, and everything would be okay again. They're seriously delusional." Cristina paused to take a deep breath before continuing her tale, and Meredith and Izzie shared worried glances. They knew that there was no point in asking any questions right now, what they didn't know was how much Burke had really hurt Cristina. Both Meredith and Izzie had enough problems, but none of them had been left at the altar, and they couldn't possibly imagine the pain Cristina had gone through. She was such a good actress, her "I am fine" façade had everyone convinced that she was over Burke. But listening to her rant, they realized that they couldn't have been more wrong.

After a couple of seconds Cristina started again, "He tried to interrupt, but I knew that I had to let everything out. I told him that even though he thought I was an unfeeling person, he couldn't have hurt me more when he left me at the altar. You know that I don't do marriage and commitment crap, but I agreed to marry him. I still don't know what possessed me to say yes, but I did, and that's where everything started going downhill. I gave way to everything he wanted, I agreed to every fricking wedding plan he and his mom came up with, and what do I get? Him deserting me at the altar before I could even make it inside those chapel doors. I wanted a small wedding at the city hall, but he insisted on inviting the whole hospital. I never imagined myself in a bridal dress, but I agreed because I wanted to make him happy. Mama shaved my eyebrows, and made me wear that fricking choker that nearly choked me to death. I was against all of it, but I did it anyways. Why? Because I wanted to make him happy. But I guess he thought I wasn't good enough for him. When I told him of that, he said that him leaving me at the altar was all his fault, and that I had nothing to do with it. So, I asked him to tell me why he did it. Why he left me on our wedding day. And guess what? He didn't have one legitimate excuse. He gave me crap about us not being happy in the future, and that I changed too much for him, but seriously those excuse are crap and he knows it. He didn't have one excuse about why he left, he doesn't know why he did it. But his one rash decision caused my downfall. It brought out all the emotions in me that I detest. I cried, I stayed up at night, I was hurt, and I was left more vulnerable than I ever was. All because of his one rash decision." Cristina ended her rant trying to blink away the tears that had somehow appeared in her eyes while she was talking.

Meredith and Izzie looked at Cristina in shock trying to digest the information she had provided them. They felt like horrible friends for not realizing how much Cristina was suffering from Burke's betrayal. Cristina had displayed emotions today that she had been denying for the past six months. Realizing that Cristina was done and probably waiting for them to say something, Meredith said, "Why didn't you tell us how much you were hurting Cristina? I am your person, aren't I? We tell each other thing. I would have never bothered you with so much of my personal problems with Derek if I had known that you were so affected by what happened."

"That was exactly why I didn't want to display any emotions. I would have been pitied, people would tiptoe around me, and you know that I hate that. I don't want to be pitied, and furthermore, I didn't want you guys to act weirdly around me." Cristina explained.

"But Cristina, holding all these emotions in wasn't the smartest move. Having people to talk to and share your pain is the best treatment. Had you talked to Meredith or me before this, you would've felt much better, and it would have helped you get over Burke faster." Izzie said.

"I guess it would have helped, but this is me we are talking about. I don't do the feelings and the girl talk crap. The only reason I let this all out today was because of the whole thing with Burke. It was just getting way over my head, and I needed to talk to someone before I would have exploded. And by the way, I am feeling so much better now that everything out of my system," Cristina stated.

"Cristina Burke is an ass. What he did was unforgivable, but you can't crumble because he is here. You have to stay strong and determined not to fall in his trap once again. I see Derek everyday at work, but I am so much more stronger now. I can stand up to him, and he doesn't have the hold over me like he used to. I don't want you to get hurt by him again, I don't want to pick up your pieces like last time. You need to remain strong and firm against him. He's here for a week, and you can't run away from him all the time he's here. You have to face him and be strong against his advances. You don't need him anymore Cristina." Meredith said, trying to say the same things that Cristina would have said had she been in her place.

Meredith was pleased to see Cristina eyes get a determined sparkle in them as she said, "You're right. What he did is unforgivable, and I can't keep running away from him. He won't be able to break me again. I am Cristina Yang, and Burke is not a part of my life anymore. I don't need him anymore. Not now. Not ever.

--

BACK AT THE HOSPITAL

Derek was scanning the hospital for Meredith, he didn't know if she had gone home or not, but he decided to check anyways. He really wanted to talk to her. He had finally realized a few things after his talk with Addison and he needed Meredith to understand them as well. He was pretty sure that Meredith would put up a fight, but he knew that he had to give it a try. He had checked the tunnel, the reception area, the ORs and their galleries, but so far no sign of her. Right now, Derek was searching the on-call rooms on the third floor, putting his ears to the doors of each one to detect any noise from the inside; he really didn't want to interrupt anybody or anything.

Stopping in front of the last on-call room, he put his ears to the door to detect any noise. Not hearing anything, he quietly opened the door and walked in. It was very dark in the room, but Derek could tell that the bunks were empty. Sighing in defeat, Derek made to turn away, when he was distracted by some movement from the middle of the room. Squinting, he noticed that someone was kneeling in the middle of the room. Making his way to the figure, Derek realized that it was Burke. Surprised at what Burke was doing kneeling in the middle on an on-call room floor, Derek walked till he was in front of him. Realizing that Burke has still not shown any recognition, Derek put his hand on his shoulder, and said, "Burke? Preston, are you okay?" Still not getting an answer, Derek squatted till he was eye-level with Burke and tried once more, "Preston, are you okay? This is me, Derek." By now, Derek knew that something was horribly wrong to make Burke act this way. But before he could say anything else, Burke seemed to come back to reality. Looking at Derek he whispered, "Derek, what are you doing here?"

"Well, I was looking for Meredith, but that's not the point. The point is that I found you in this pitch black on-call room, kneeling on the floor, apparently very far away from reality. Are you okay?" Derek asked in concern.

"Okay? Oh yeah, I am okay. I am great, just great. I just talked to my ex-fiancée, who hates my guts, and doesn't want or need me in her life anymore." Burke said bitterly.

Derek immediately knew what had happened to get Burke into such a state. Looking at Burke, he said, "Okay, you don't need to say anything else. The first thing we do is go to Joe's, get some hard core alcohol and then you tell me what happened."

Burke contemplated the idea for a couple of seconds, and then with a sigh nodded slightly.

"Good, let's go." Derek said, satisfied.

Burke got up from the position he had been sitting in for the past three hours, stretched his legs, and followed Derek into the brightly lit corridors of SGH.

Burke and Derek got to Joe's without bumping into either Cristina or Meredith, something Burke was thankful for.

Entering the crowded bar, Derek said, "You go get us a booth, while I get the drinks. What would you like?"

"Anything that's strong enough to numb the feeling of pain and worthlessness I have now," Burke answered shortly.

Nodding understandingly, Derek made his way to buy the drinks while Burke went to find them a booth.

A couple of minutes later, Derek arrived with a full bottle of tequila and two glasses. Burke had found a booth in the back of the bar, where the activity level was low, giving them an opportunity to talk without interruption.

Pouring out a glass for both of them, Derek passed Burke his glass and saw Burke swallow the whole thing in one gulp.

Sipping the contents in his glass slowly, Derek turned to Burke and said, "So, you want to um, talk about it now?"

"Talk about what? About how royally I screwed up my relationship with Cristina? Or hoe much pain and hurt I have caused her over the course of six months? Or how I don't even have a legitimate reason why I left her at the altar? I have been trying to find a reason about why I left Cristina on our wedding day, and you know what, I haven't found one that I am satisfied, how am I suppose to satisfy her. She asked me for my reasons, and I didn't have any. For the first time today, I saw the first hand damage I did to her when I left her at the altar. And then I was such a coward that I didn't even bother to come and say goodbye. I asked to you to break the news to Cristina and left my mom to get my stuff. I was a coward, because I couldn't bear to see how much I had hurt her."

He stopped for a second to gather his thoughts and feelings, and then continued, "Today, after the chief's meeting, I cornered her, and took her to the on-call room you found me in. She was pissed. I asked her to talk to her, and she was very reluctant at first, but then gave me one minute to speak. I started off with the only thing I thought suitable, I told her I was sorry. Just hearing that word made her lash out. She screamed at me, she said that sorry wasn't enough to take back the pain she went through over the past six months. I didn't realize how much she had loved me, I didn't realize it till I was too late. I was so insecure about our relationship, while on the other hand, she was ready to commit. The timing couldn't have been any better. While the rest of the hospital was counting on Cristina to bail on the wedding, I was the one who got cold-feet just when she was ready to give herself to me. Do you know how much is hurts to see the person you love in pain?" Seeing Derek nod, he said, "Then just imagine how much more it would hurt to realize that the person you love is in pain because of you, and there's no one else to blame for. I took my relationship with her for granted. While I spent my time pointing out our differences, she was trying to patch our differences, she was trying so hard to make us work, and I ended up hurting her up so brutally. I crushed her, her pride, her identity, everything she was made of. I am the reason of every ounce of pain she went through over the past six months. They say, you don't hurt the person you love, but I did the exact opposite. These six months made me realize how much I love Cristina. How much she means to me. And today made me realize how badly I have hurt her. I love her, I love her so, so much, but after what I did, I doubt that she will ever want me back in her life."

And with that, he slammed his glass on the table and made his way out of the bar, not wanting Derek to see the tears that had appeared in his eyes. Getting out in the cold Seattle night, he realized that no matter how great of a surgeon he was, he had failed horribly in the parts of life that had really mattered.

**A/N:** Wow, another long one. Hope you guys liked it. I want Burke to realize the full effect of his mistake, and for him to realize how much he had hurt Cristina. I just got 8 reviews for the last chapter, but I decided to post anyways because my next week is really busy. So, for the next update I need **10 **reviews, so whenever that happens, I will post the next chapter. Just a little spoiler for next chapter, Jacob (Cristina's date) enters the story, and an event that will shock you guys! So with that said, enjoy the chapter, and please, please, please **REVIEW!**


	11. A crushed heart

Chapter 11: A crushed heart

Cristina arrived at the hospital the next morning with Meredith, Izzie and Alex. Izzie, Meredith and Cristina had talked till about midnight last night, and by that time Cristina had been so drunk, that she was in no condition to drive home. She was almost ready to pass out when Alex came home, and took her to Meredith's room for the night.

As expected, Cristina was extremely grouchy and hung over, and the others knew better than to talk to her before she had her cup of coffee.

As soon as they had entered the hospital, Cristina made a bee-line for the coffee cart, while the others headed towards the resident's locker room to change into their scrubs.

Five minutes later, Cristina came in with a cup of coffee in her hand, looking more human like. Seeing that the three of them were giving her weird looks, Cristina snapped, "What's wrong with you guys? Don't you have anything better to do rather than staring at a hung over person?"

"Oh no Yang, we were just admiring how much of a bitch you are when you are hung over", Alex said sarcastically, emitting a small laugh from Meredith and Izzie.

"Go to hell evil spawn", Cristina growled heading towards the restrooms.

"I am already there Yang, you of all people should know that," Alex quipped back, smirking at the deathly glare Cristina had just shot at him. Looking at the interaction between the two, Meredith and Izzie burst out laughing, as Cristina slammed the bathroom door shut behind her.

"Dude, she's got something up her ass today", Alex said after a couple of seconds.

"She's having a hard time Alex, with Burke coming back and stuff, she's being going through a lot", Meredith explained.

"Yea, well I don't see the sense in that. I don't get act like a cranky bitch every time Rebecca shows up at the hospital", Alex retaliated, not noticing the shocked and disgusted look on Meredith and Izzie's faces.

"Are you seriously comparing your situation with Rebecca, with Cristina and Burke's relationship? Seriously Alex? Last time I checked she didn't ask you to marry her and then leave you at the altar", Meredith snapped.

"Alright, alright dude, chill. No need to get your knickers in a twist. I was just saying", Alex said rolling his eyes.

"You really are an ass", Izzie said, as she and Meredith made their way out of the locker room to meet Dr. Bailey to get their assignments for the day.

"Tell me something I don't know", Alex smirked following the two outside.

Two minutes later, the three were standing near the nurse's station waiting for Dr. Bailey to show up. A couple of seconds later Cristina arrived apparently out of breath from running all the way from the locker room.

"Dr. Bailey's not here? Thank God, I would have been really screwed if she was", she gasped, clutching the railing trying to even out her breathing.

"Seems like someone's back to normal again," Alex smirked.

But before Cristina could come up with a snappy reply, she was interrupted with the arrival of Dr. Bailey.

"Well, there you fools are. Good to see that you have all made it on time today. Now without any further discussion, here are your assignments for today. Grey you're with Dr. Hahn, Karev with Sloan and Stevens with Shepherd. Yang, you and your interns are in the pit today. No whining or complaining. I don't have time for you childish excuses. And remember, you are meeting with your attendings at 4 to discuss the progress of the conjoined twins' case. Now move", Bailey ordered.

The residents moved to their assigned destinations, paging their interns as they moved to assign them their assignments for the day.

Christina made her way to the pit, paging her interns as she went. She let out a big sigh as she got on the elevator. She had started the day on the wrong foot. She had gotten off hung over, bickered with Alex, and now she was assigned to the pit. This day couldn't get any worse. As she got off the elevator and headed towards the pit, she didn't realize how wrong she was.

When she got to the pit, she saw her interns standing there, waiting for her to come and give them their assignments. Approaching them she snapped, "Alright let's get something straight. I am pissed today, and if you do anything to piss me off even more, I will make this entire year hell for you. Got it?" Seeing her interns nod fearfully, she continued, "Now that we got that covered, one and two you are doing the post ops for Dr. Hahn's surgery. Three you are with me in the pit, and four and five you are doing trauma control. I don't want to see your faces until your assignments are successfully done. Now move."

She watched with some satisfaction as her frightened interns moved to their assigned tasks. _Being a resident definitely had its perks_, Cristina thought satisfactorily.

She and Lexie had been in the pit for the less than five minutes when the first ambulance came into view. "Alright, here's our first patient of the day, let's move", Cristina ordered Lexie as the ambulance came into a halt in front of them.

The ambulance's door opened as a young paramedic got out and started reciting the case history of the patient, "Matthew Nelson, 68, unconscious after going into cardiac arrest 20 minutes ago. We managed to bring him back, but heart beat really slow. BP extremely low, 60/80. We pushed in 500 mg of aspirin to keep the blood flow clear to the heart. Need an immediate valve replacement surgery."

Cristina immediately got into action as the patient was rolled onto a gurney. But before she could do anything, a car rolled up in the pit. Parking his car into a corner, Jacob Nelson got out of the car and ran to where the gurney was situated.

"Oh my god, Dad! Is he going to be okay? What's wrong?" He gasped.

"This is your dad?" Cristina asked her semi-boyfriend.

"Yea, I got a call from the paramedic on my way to work, and they told me that he had gone into cardiac arrest. I told them to bring him here and that I'd be there soon. He's going to be okay right?" Jacob asked desperately.

"Jacob you're a doctor yourself, you know the risks and dangers of a cardiac arrest. But we're going to do all we can to save him", Cristina said trying to comfort the distraught man in front of her. Turning to Lexie she ordered, "Three, page Dr. Hahn immediately, tell her it's an emergency."

"Dr. Hahn is in surgery. She just went in, it will be a couple of hours till she is finished", Lexie said.

"Dammit, well who else is available?" Cristina demanded.

But before Lexie could answer, Jacob interjected, "I want an attending operating on my father. I won't go for anyone else."

"Jacob don't be stupid. You know your dad needs the surgery immediately, and Dr. Hahn is the only cardio attending available right now. We can get your dad a good resident. There are plenty of good ones-"

However Cristina was once again interrupted by Jacob, "That's not true, Dr. Burke and Dr. Kurt are here for the conjoined twins' surgery. They're both attendings, and the best shot my dad can get. Get one of them paged, I am sure they won't mind performing an extra surgery."

Sighing, Cristina turned to Lexie and said, "Well then page Dr. Kurt and see if he can perform the surgery". Cristina really didn't want Burke to do the surgery, because that would mean that she would have to spend 5-6 hours in an OR with him and she really wasn't looking forward to that. However, luck didn't seem to be on her side as Lexie answered, "Um Dr. Yang, Dr. Kurt isn't in the hospital. The chief said that he would be arriving at noon, so the only attending we have left is Dr. Burke."

Cursing her luck, Cristina grudgingly said, "Well, page Dr. Burke then. Tell him that we are in trauma room one, and that the patient needs a valve replacement immediately."

Lexie nodded and immediately paged Dr. Burke.

"Well people, let's take him to trauma room one, so I can take his stats and the necessary tests needed before we can operate." Cristina ordered, as she and the nurses wheeled the gurney inside.

--

10 MINUTES LATER

Cristina had just finished taking Mr. Nelson's tests when Burke walked into the trauma room. He was in his navy scrubs and lucky scrub cap, all ready to perform the surgery.

He completely disregarded Cristina as he entered the room, and Cristina was more than happy to return the gesture.

"So what have we got here?", Burke asked turning to Lexie.

"Mr. Matthew Nelson, 68, went into cardiac arrest about 30 minutes ago. He was brought back in the ambulance. ECG irregular and BP low, 65/90," Lexie relayed.

"So, Dr. Grey where do we go from here?" Burke questioned while going through Mr. Nelson's file.

"Well, Dr. Yang took the CT, ECG and EKG, and from the results of those our next step should be to take Mr. Nelson right into surgery before his heart deteriorates even more. He will be needing a valve replacement", Lexie answered.

"Good job Dr. Grey. Prep an OR, we will start the surgery in 15 minutes. Dr. Yang and you will be scrubbing in." And with that, he left the room.

Throughout the whole time Burke was talking to Lexie, Cristina couldn't help but remember the days when he used to question her like that. The days when he would compliment her on her skills and let her scrub in all his surgeries. However that was all in the past, it was nothing but old memories. It will never happen again. It was history.

Snapping back to reality she turned to Lexie and said, "Well, what are you waiting for? Go prep the OR, while I get Dr. Nelson to sign the consent forms."

Lexie quickly left the trauma room to prep the OR while Cristina gathered the forms Jacob needed to fill.

Walking out of the room, she saw Jacob slumped against the wall across the room. Seeing her, he immediately walked up to her and said, "So, how is he? How bad is his heart? I want you to tell me the truth please, I need to know."

"Well Jacob, it was a massive attack, but his chances are looking good, He's been holding on for so long, the chances that he will survive the surgery are good. That's all I can tell you right now, but before we proceed into surgery, I need to fill out the consent forms. The surgery will start in 15 minutes; they should be wheeling your dad into the OR very soon." Cristina explained.

"Alright, I guess that's good", Jacob said taking the forms from Cristina. "You will be scrubbing in the surgery right? You are the best resident in cardio, and I want you to be there. I would feel much better if I knew you will be assisting on the surgery."

"Yes, don't worry, I am scrubbing in, and we're going to do all in our power to make sure that he survives the surgery", Cristina said, placing a comforting hand on his shoulders.

"Thanks", Jacob replied gratefully.

"No problem. I have to go now, but my intern and some nurses will be here in a couple of minutes. Give those completed forms to her, and she'll give them to me." Cristina said, as she made her way to the ORs to get ready to scrub in.

15 minutes later Burke walked into the OR to find his whole surgical team ready for the surgery to commence. Quickly walking towards the patient on the table he said, "I admit it's been a while since I have performed a surgery in these ORs, but I am still the same Preston Burke, all of you are used to working with, so no worries," smiling at the nurses around him, he took a deep breath and said, "Scalpel". He reached out to take the scalpel from a nurse, and made the first cut, marking the beginning of another intense surgery.

The surgery had been going on smoothly for the past hour. The OR was extremely quiet, except for the constant buzz of the heart monitor, and the occasional movements from the nurses. Things were looking good for Mr. Nelson when all of a sudden a shrill alarm broke the peaceful silence of the OR.

"BP dropping, heart rate decreasing. He's crashing", Nurse Debbie called out.

Surprised at the sudden complication, Burke called out, "I can't move right now. If I move the instrument from his heart right now, he will bleed out. Dr. Yang, I need you to shock him."

Quickly getting into action, Cristina grabbed the device from Debbie's hand and said, "Charge to 200. Clear." No change.

"Charge to 250. Clear". The heart started beating, but flat lined again in 5 seconds.

"Alright, charge to 300. Clear." This time, the heart started responding.

"BP's rising, heart rate back to normal." Nurse Debbie confirmed.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Cristina went to her original position, right across Burke. In that way she could easily see and assist in the surgery, and there was no Burke next to her to distract her. So far things were going just the way Cristina had wanted them to.

"Good work, Dr. Yang", Burke complimented, realizing just how much he had missed having Cristina in his OR. Cristina ignored his compliment, not even acknowledging the fact that he had just spoken to her. Sighing deeply, Burke resumed his working, ignoring the feeling of disappointment that had just overtaken him.

After another 2 hours of silence in the OR, the surgery was nearing completion. Mr. Nelson hadn't given them any more scares, and the odds of full recovery had increased considerably.

But Burke was irritated. Not because of the surgery, no, he was irritated by a certain resident. Who might that resident be? It was none other than Cristina Yang. She wasn't doing anything, and that was the reason he was so irritated with her. Throughout the 3 hours they had spent in the OR together, she hadn't said a word to him, never gained eye contact and had ignored him everything he had tried to speak to her. She had been standing across for him throughout the surgery, helping out here and there, but never making any physical contact.

But right now, Burke was at an advantage. Burke knew Cristina's weaknesses, and just as he was about to do the running whip stitch, an idea came to him. He was going to make her an offer that she could not refuse, and that would not only lead her to stand next to him, but will also get her to acknowledge his presence. Looking toward Cristina, he said innocently, "Dr. Yang, would you like to do the final running whip stitch?"

Cristina immediately looked up at the words "running whip stitch". Gaining eye contact with Burke for the first time in the past three years, she knew immediately the real reason behind his request. He knew what buttons to push when it came for her, and a surgical offer was one of them. There was no way she could give up an opportunity to do a running whip stitch by herself, and he knew it, and he was using it to his advantage.

Glaring at Burke, she said, "I would love to".

As she moved to take her place next to him, Burke couldn't help but smile. Cristina would be doing a running whip stitch next to him, just like she had done so many times before. She was the only first year resident who could do a running whip stitch without any supervision, and he had given her that talent. He couldn't help but feel proud as she successfully and flawlessly completed the stitch, her eyes and hand completely focused on the task at hand.

Burke was so lost in the old memories, that he didn't hear Cristina calling his name the first time.

"Dr. Burke?" Cristina called for the second time, jolting Burke back to reality.

"Dr. Yang, sorry, you were saying something?" Burke asked regaining his composure.

Looking irritated Cristina replied, "Yes, I am done. All you have to do now is stitch the skin back, and we can transfer him to recovery since his stats have been stable for the past two hours."

"Good work Dr. Yang. Dr. Yang, you can scrub out while I finish the sutures. Dr. Grey, you are in charge of the post-ops of the surgery, and Nurse Debbie, I want him transferred to recovery as soon as the surgery is completed," Burke instructed.

Debbie nodded, and turned to the other nurses to give them instructions. Lexie checked the stats for the post ops as Cristina made her way to scrub out.

Cristina knew it won't be long before Burke is done with the sutures, and she wanted to get out of the scrub room before Burke comes in and gets a chance to corner her once again.

She quickly discarded her gloves and surgical mask, and made her way to the sink to wash her hands. Sighing in relief that Burke was still in the OR, she made her way out to inform Jacob about his dad's successful surgery.

She however didn't have to go very far away. She had just stepped out of scrub room, when she was confronted by a very worried looking Jacob.

"So, how did it go? Please, tell me the whole truth, don't try to cover it with lies. Tell me exactly what happened in there." he demanded.

"Calm down Jacob, the surgery was successful. He flat lined once on the table, but we brought him back, and Dr. Burke did a wonderful job. Your dad's stable and is being moved to recovery as we speak." Cristina said.

"Oh thank you, thank you so much", he said delighted. And before Cristina could say anything, he pulled her to him, and kissed her right on the mouth. Cristina was so stunned that she could do nothing but kiss him back.

Coming out of the scrub room, Burke stopped in his tracks as he saw the scene unfolding before him, and could do nothing but watch in horror as the love of his life kissed another man right in front of him. The whole hall seemed to have become deathly silent, and the only sound Burke could hear was the crushing of his heart at the pain he felt as he witnessed the scene in front of him.

**A/N:** Wow, wow, wow! Burke saw Cristina kissing Jacob. That has got to hurt! I must admit I really feel bad for Burke right now, but I thought it was a nice twist! Next chapter: What's the after math of the kiss? How will Burke and Cristina react? And Cristina would be spending more time with Burke against her wishes…That could get awkward! Also, my information on the medical procedures and medications can be faulty, so I am really sorry about that. I am not a doctor! Also more than 100 reviews! You guys seriously rock! So, **at least 10** reviews till you get the next chapter. Comments are seriously appreciated so please tell me what you think. With that said, enjoy the chapter, and please, please, **REVIEW!**


	12. Fate hates us

Chapter 12: Fate hates us

It took Cristina three seconds to realize what she was doing. Coming back to reality, she quickly pushed Jacob off her, and the first thing she saw was an extremely stunned Burke standing right across from her. Blushing slightly at the awkwardness of the situation, Cristina quickly turned towards Jacob, trying to ignore Burke's intense eyes.

"Um, Jacob this is the hospital, we really shouldn't be doing this here", Cristina stated awkwardly.

"Oh yea, of course, I wasn't thinking about what I was doing, I am sorry", Jacob said, not sounding sorry at all.

"Well, if you want to go see your dad, he should be in recovery by now, and since you work here I'm pretty sure the nurses will let you in", Cristina said professionally.

"I'll do just that. Once again thank you so much", Jacob said, quickly kissing her on the cheek and hurrying off towards the recovery room.

Trying to ignore the fact that Burke's intense eyes were glaring holes in the back of her head, Cristina tried to calmly walk by Burke on her way back to the pit.

However she wasn't very lucky. She was just past Burke, when she felt him grip her upper arm.

"Cristina?" Burke said in a dangerously low voice.

"That was none of your business Dr. Burke. Now I would suggest that you let go of my arm because not only is it unprofessional, there are some nurses coming towards us and they might get the wrong idea," Cristina snapped.

At the mention of nurse, Burke immediately let go of Cristina's arm. He was never big on public display of affection. Even when Cristina and him were dating, Burke had made sure to keep their personal life away from the gossip mill of SGH.

The second Burke let go of her arm, Cristina made a run for the elevator before Burke could find other ways of cornering her.

Cursing the ill timing of this whole situation, Burke turned around to find Derek walking towards him.

"Hey, why do you look as if a car ran over your pet dog?" Derek questioned.

"I just saw Cristina kissing another guy. Right in front of me", Burke replied dejectedly.

"Ouch, that's got to hurt. Did you know that Meredith has been in a steady relationship for three weeks, and is apparently very happy," Derek said bitterly.

"Do you think Cristina is dating him?" Burke questioned, not hearing a word Derek had just said.

"Last time I checked, Yang was single. But ever since I broke up with Rose, I haven't had a great access to the hospital's gossip mill", Derek said seriously.

"So you think she was just kissing random guys? That doesn't really sound like Cristina," Burke said in a confused tone.

"You know you're being a horrible friend right now. I am venting my feelings about how royally I screwed things up with Meredith, and all you can talk about is if Yang's dating someone or if she's going around kissing random men", Derek said annoyed at the lack of Burke's attention.

"The world doesn't revolve around you are your problems with Meredith you know. I have more major problems to deal with. And you brought your downfall through your own hands. Seriously breaking up with Meredith for a nurse. You have no standards," Burke snapped.

"If I brought my downfall through my own hands, what does that say about you? Meredith I had been on rocks for a while, I got tired of waiting and I sought someone else, I know it's a lame excuse, but hey it wasn't as if we were say, getting married and I left her at the altar. You had a perfectly stable relationship, sure you had problems here and there, but then who doesn't have problems? Yang had agreed to marry you, and for Yang to commit to something as big as marriage, let's just say, that it was nothing short of a miracle. She was ready to give you your happily ever after, and what do you do? You run away. Everyone thought that Yang would get cold-feet in the end, nobody would have thought that Preston Burke would be the one who wasn't able to handle the commitment of a marriage. You had everything in your hand that day Burke, and with one move you lost everything that had meant so much to you. You had love, marriage, a happily ever after, and a secure future, but you let all of it go in one stupid move. If me dating Rose was an idiotic move, what does that say about you leaving Yang at the altar. Not the smartest move, that's for sure," Derek lectured.

"I made the worst mistake of my life that day when I left her at the altar. I know that. The whole time I was in Boston I couldn't think of anything but why I did what I did. And you know what? I don't know why I did it, why I left her standing there at the altar. I haven't been able to come up with an excuse to satisfy myself, what the hell am I supposed to tell Cristina? How am I supposed to tell her how fricking sorry I am for doing what I did? She appears to hate me, she doesn't talk to me, she make excuses so she doesn't have to face me. Not only that, we were in a surgery together for three hours, and not once did she make eye contact with me. You have any idea how much it hurts? And then to realize that you have brought this hurt by your own hand", Burke said despairingly.

"I am not the right person to answer that question. In case you haven't noticed, me and you are on the same boat. And you know what that boat is called? The failures of life. That's what we are. Failures. We may have made our names in our professions, but when it comes to the reality of life, we're nothing but failures. We don't deserve their forgiveness; we have hurt them way too much, way too many times to count. It's like we break them, date other people, be happy, but when they start dating someone other than us we blow up in blind rage. How fair have we been?" Derek said dejectedly.

"Shepherd are you seeing a psychiatrist? Nothing but counseling could have you looking at things like the way you just explained them", Burke asked incredulously.

"Nah, I just had a long talk with Mark yesterday," Derek said with a dry laugh, "How ironic is this situation? Mark, the womanizer who can't stay with a woman for more than a week, is giving me relationship advice, before it always used to be the other way round. And what's even more ridiculous is that right now Mark is the only one among our group with a stable and committed relationship."

"Wow, talk about irony. Seems like the tables have turned huh?" Burke said with a humorless laugh as he realized how true Derek's observation was.

"We apparently have no life. Talking about failed relationships like high school girls. Anyways I have to go. I was on my way to check a patient before I got sidetracked. See you later man. Try not to kill yourself in your sorrow", Derek said with a small smile.

"I'll try," Burke said, while Derek continued on his way to check his patient.

_He's right. We're nothing but failures. _Burke thought as he made his way to the chief's office.

--

Addison and Callie had just sat down to eat lunch in the cafeteria when they were joined by none other than Erica Hahn.

"Hey you guys mind if I join you?" Erica asked.

"No, not at all. Have a seat", Addison said.

"Where's Mark today? Usually you guys eat lunch together," Callie said in a teasing tone.

"He has surgery, he'll probably join us in a while", Erica said, rolling her eyes at Callie's teasing tone.

"So, you and Mark huh? That's really something", Addison said sipping her orange juice.

"I don't know how many times I have heard that ever since we made our relationship public," Erica stated.

"It is pretty incredible, you know, for Mark to be with a woman for 5 weeks. And from what I have gathered with the way he talks to you and about you, is that he really likes you. And that's something surprising in itself. Mark don't tend to fall for women. That's just not his style," Addison said matter-of-factly.

"Basically what you are saying is that you're stunned at how much everything's changed ever since you left SGH six months ago," Callie said.

"The four things that I have heard and seen that have really shocked me are Meredith and Derek breaking up, Derek dating a nurse, Mark and Erica's relationship and the fact that Burke and Cristina still have feelings for each other", Addison replied.

"That's all you've noticed?" Callie asked in a shocked tone, "That's not even half of the changes this hospital under went while you weren't here, and I am just talking about the major changes."

"I am sure you're just exaggerating Callie," Addison said, wondering what other major changes the people at SGH went through while she was gone.

"Oh I can assure you that I am not. Want to hear about everything's that changed here?" Callie asked.

"Alright, let's hear some about these 'major changes' you're talking about", Addison said.

"Alright, prepare yourself, it's not very pretty. One, the chief and his wife are divorced, you already know about Derek and Meredith, Dr. Bailey's son was in a massive accident about three months ago, and she and her husband are separated which is why she usually have Tuck around with her. The nurses have created a group called, _Nurses United Against Mark Sloan_, your pregnant Jane Doe from the ferry lied to Alex telling her that she was pregnant with his baby, when she actually wasn't. Alex found out and completely blew up. George failed his intern exam and is repeating his intern year, and while we're on the topic of George, he slept with Stevens, and as a result me and him are in separation," Callie finished, enjoying the stunned look on Addison's face.

"You weren't joking when you said things have changed around here. It's like everyone in this hospital is leading a different life than the time when I was here", Addison said after a couple of minutes.

"Six months is a long time Addie, especially if you work at SGH", Callie said.

"No kidding, but wait George cheated on you? With Stevens? So that's the married guy she was talking about," Addison said thoughtfully.

"You knew that Stevens slept with my husband and you didn't tell me?" Callie asked reproachfully.

"Oh no. A couple of days before I left, Stevens told me that she slept with a married man, she didn't tell me who it was though. So, you and George are divorce now?" Addison questioned.

But before Callie could answer, Erica spoke up, "They have a meeting with the lawyers next week, but Callie isn't sure if she actually want to get divorced or not."

"Is it wrong that I still love him even after what he did to me?" Callie questioned sullenly.

"No, it's not wrong at all. You fall in love very fast, but it takes a long time to fall out of love. I don't want you to make any decisions that you might end up regretting. Why don't you talk to him? You guys could try dating again. You never really dated the first time round, so it'll be a great new experience. What he did was wrong, and if he admits to it, and regrets his actions, then I think you guys have another chance at a successful marriage. You shouldn't end your marriage if you're so hesitant, not if he feels the same way", Addison said.

"Yea but that's the thing. I am pretty sure he doesn't feel the same way. I mean, he and Stevens started dating right after we separated--"

"Oh yeah, and that relationship worked out really well", Erica interrupted sarcastically, "They didn't even last a week Callie. And don't start again with the whole 'he's over me' speech. Seriously it's getting old. I have seen the way he looks at you when he thinks no body's looking. He looks at you in a way that says that he had you and then lost you and there's no one to blame but him. He hasn't been on a single date ever since he broke up with Stevens, and I have heard for an extremely reliable source that he always keeps his wedding rings with him. What more proof do you want?"

"Okay Callie seriously? Either you're in extreme denial or you're blind. If what Erica said is true, it should be painfully obvious that the guy still has the hots for you. Do not ruin your marriage because both of you are too scared to approach each other. You do not want to regret this decision in the future and live you life full of 'what ifs'," Addison said, trying to knock some sense in the woman in front of her.

"I think O'Malley is scared to approach her. Callie can easily punch his face, breaking his nose or something", Erica said playfully, while Addison laughed.

"Oh shut up", Callie said blushing, "I'll need to think on this for a while, I promise I won't take very long".

Five minutes later, Mark Sloan entered the cafeteria looking for his girlfriend. Finding her sitting with Callie and Addison, he quickly made his way to their table.

"So, how are my three favorite ladies doing this beautiful afternoon," Mark asked cheerfully.

"Hey, I thought I was the only favorite lady in your life", Addison said teasingly.

"You still are, I just had to make so compensations since the number of ladies in my life have increased drastically," Mark said dramatically.

"You're never going to grow up are you?", Erica asked in amusement.

"Ah, I don't know. So what were you ladies talking about?" Mark asked curiously.

"Nothing", Erica, Addison and Callie replied at the same time.

"Ah, so you guys were talking about me, weren't you? You guys are in awe of my skills, you just don't want to say it to my face", Mark boasted.

"Why would we want to boost your already overly-large ego Sloan?" Callie asked incredulously.

"And please, don't flatter yourself thinking that we were talking about your oh-so-wonderful skills, when we all know that you when it comes to skills, you're less than half the doctor I am", Addison relied cheekily.

"Ouch Addie, that was a deep cut to my heart", Mark moaned dramatically as the three women laughed.

Looking around Addison said, "Um Mark, why are those teeny-boopers staring at you?"

Mark paled as Erica and Callie burst out laughing as they remembered what happened the last time the 'teeny-boopers' were staring at Mark.

"They're probably discussing how much Mark looks like their dads", Erica smirked as she regained control.

"What?" Addison asked confused, apparently missing the joke.

"Apparently a couple of months ago, some teenage girls were staring at Mark, when Mark called them over to ask if they want anything, one of the girl said that he looked exactly liked her dad", Callie said, as Addison burst out laughing as she pictured the scene in her head.

"You know I don't even know why I'm friends with you guys. I don't get anything but an ego-bashing while I'm with you people. And you're corrupting Erica, she's not this mean when we're alone together", Mark said with a mock sigh.

"While I really want to stay here and bash Sloan's ego with you guys, I have to go check on a patient. I'll see after work at Joe's then", Callie said as she got ready to get back to work again.

"Yea, lunch break should be over by now, and I have a surgery in a while, so I am going to have to leave also", Erica said getting up.

"I'll walk with you", Mark said quickly wanting to get some alone time with Erica before she heads of to surgery.

"Alright, while you guys save lives, I am going to pay a little visit to Miranda", Addison said as she headed out to find a certain chief resident.

--

3:30 P.M.

Meredith and Cristina were talking at the nurse's station when Dr. Bailey approached them.

"Yang", Dr. Bailey snapped, apparently in a bad mood.

"Dr. Bailey?" Cristina asked wondering what she had done this time.

"You are supposed to meet Dr. Hahn at 4 to go over the case right?" Bailey questioned.

"Yes, I am. But I still have ½ hour before the meeting," Cristina said.

"I know what time it is Yang, but what you don't know is that you will be having the meeting with Dr. Burke instead of Dr. Hahn, at least for the first 20 minutes or so", Dr. Bailey instructed.

"With Dr. Burke?" Cristina stuttered.

"Yea, with Dr. Burke. Dr. Hahn's surgery is running a little late, so Dr. Burke will cover for her", Bailey explained.

"But Dr. Bailey—"

"No buts Yang. I am your boss, you do what I tell you to do. This isn't my decision, if you have any problem with it, then take it with the chief. I don't have time to hear you complain", Bailey said sharply.

Meredith smirked at the look of Cristina's face. She looked like she wanted to kill someone.

"What are you smirking about Grey?" Bailey snapped looking at the smirk on Meredith's face, "If I'm not mistaken, you are meeting with Shepherd in ½ an hour, and that's certainly not a walk in the park for you."

The smirk on Meredith's face was immediately wiped off, as Cristina felt a little better that she wasn't the only who will be going through an hour of hell.

"Now the two of you better make it to the meeting on time, or you'll have me to answer to", Bailey said severely, and with that she turned and started walking towards the elevators leaving two very depressed residents behind.

Once she was out of ear shot, Cristina turned toward Meredith and said, "Admit it, fate hates us".

"You know what Cristina? You're absolutely right, and this might be the first and last time you will hear me say that", Meredith sighed.

As the two residents looked around the empty nurse station, they were sure of one thing: Neither of them wanted to go to that 4 o'clock meeting with their exes.

**A/N:** I am so sorry for the delay. I know it's been a while since I updated! My school work has been ridiculously crazy for the past week or so and I've been completely out of it. Once again I am really sorry, and I certainly hope that you guys won't have to wait so long for another chapter. I know you were probably looking forward to a confrontation between Burktina, but I had to build up to that point. I had fun writing this chapter with the whole Burke/Derek and Mark/Erica/Addison/Callie conversation. So, you know the drill, **at least 10** reviews before I post up the next chapter. (Next chapter: All Burketina and MerDer) So with that said, enjoy the chapter, and please, please, **REVIEW!**


	13. Exes and Arguments

Chapter 13: Exes & Arguments

_Last chapter_

_Neither of them wanted to go to that 4 o'clock meeting with their exes._

_--_

4 o'clock came extremely fast for both Meredith and Cristina. From the time Dr. Bailey had left them, both of them had their fingers crossed for an emergency so that they could get out of spending an extremely uncomfortable hour with their exes. However like Cristina had presumed, fate did indeed hate them, and at 4:03, they had no choice but to go to the meeting or risk being killed by Dr. Bailey.

Cristina and Meredith dejectedly walked towards the conference rooms where they were supposed to meet Burke and Derek. Cristina stopped in front of Conference Room 1, while Meredith made her way next door.

"Good luck", Meredith whispered, and taking a deep breath, she quickly turned the door knob and made her way inside the room.

Cristina vaguely heard Meredith wish her good luck, all she could think about right now is how she was supposed to spend 20 minutes with a man who she was doing her best to avoid. A man who she hadn't seen for 6 months, who had left her on their wedding day leaving her brutally broken.

Knowing that it wouldn't be long before Burke comes out to look for her, she willed herself to calm down, and taking a deep breath, she turned the door knob and made her way in, the sickening feeling in her tummy intensifying with every step she took.

Burke looked up from the file he was reading when he heard the door open and saw Cristina walk in and slam the door behind her.

"Dr. Yang, nice of you to finally show up", Burke said, mentally hitting himself the second the words left his mouth. This wasn't how their conversation was supposed to start. Now, Cristina would get snappy, and any hopes of having a civil conversation flew out of the window. _Damn this woman, always gets the worse reaction out of me_, Burke thought dejectedly.

"Oh I'm sorry Dr. Burke, I didn't know waiting for five minutes was so painful for you", Cristina snapped, sarcasm dripping from every word.

"I'm sorry Dr. Yang, I didn't mean to say that", Burke tried to apologize.

"Yeah, yeah whatever. I'm stuck in here with you because of this stupid meeting, so let's get over with it already okay? Can I please see the case's history", Cristina asked with forced politeness.

"Of course", Burke handed her the file knowing that it would be useless to talk to her right now.

After about 5 minutes, Burke couldn't take the silence anymore.

"So, that kiss in front of the OR? What was that about", Burke asked casually, asking the question that had been plaguing his mind ever since he saw the scene in front of the OR.

"I fail to see how me kissing a guy is any of your business", Cristina snapped without looking up from the file.

"It's not. I was just wondering if the guy was your boyfriend, or is kissing random guys a new habit of yours?" Burke asked, tired of her snappy attitude.

"Are you calling me a slut", Cristina asked incredulously, stunned at Burke's audacity to ask a question like that.

"I don't recall saying anything of that sort", Burke answered. This conversation was headed in the entirely wrong direction.

"Really? Because I swear I heard you ask me if kissing random guys is a new habit of mine. I am sure that counts as you calling me a slut", Cristina said angrily.

"I'm sorry it if sounded that way to you Dr. Yang, I can assure you that I didn't mean it like that", Burke said, desperately trying to control the situation before it got too out of hands.

Ignoring Burke, Cristina continued, "And why the hell do you care if the guy's my boyfriend or if I kiss random guys in the hallway. It's none of your business who I kiss, or who I go out with. You are nothing but my colleague, whatever we had ended on that day you decided to walk out on our wedding day."

"I was just curious", Burke explained lamely.

"Well let me satiate your curiosity. I am dating Jacob, the guy you saw me kiss is my boyfriend", Cristina said, smirking at the emotions that flashed on Burke's face at Cristina's words, the most prominent of which was hurt.

"Your boy-boyfriend?" Burke asked, trying to wrap his mind around the fact that Cristina _his_ Cristina was dating someone other than him.

"Yes, boyfriend. You know the person you used to be before you ditched me at the altar", Cristina said coldly. She knew she was being mean, hell she was being downright cruel, but at this point, she didn't care. In her eyes Burke deserved nothing but a cold shoulder from her after what he had done to her.

Noticing the extreme coldness in her voice, Burke snapped, "Why are you acting like this? Like you can't stand being 10 feet around me. I know that you probably don't like the fact that I am here, and that I really hurt you when I left you at the altar, but can you just please make eye contact with me for one second. If you do that, you might realize that I am just as hurt as you are."

"Did you seriously just ask me why I'm acting like this? I don't just dislike the fact that you're here, I hate it. I can't stand being around you for a second, the only reason I'm here is because I'm being forced to. You did more than just hurt me when you left me at the altar, you broke me, you broke my trust, and you made it impossible for me to trust anyone else. I gave my whole self to you and what do you do? You break it a million different pieces. My friends had to pick up the pieces of what you had broken. My friends were there when you weren't. You left without a word, without saying good bye. In less than 12 hours not only had you broken me, you completely switched your lifestyles. You moved all the way cross country, started a new job, and left all your past behind. Don't stand there telling me that you are just as hurt, because I had to suffer way more than you. While you started a new life in Boston, I was stuck here. I was stuck in this hospital with all the memories and my past haunting me everywhere I went. I had no name, no reputation. I was a first year resident trying to make an image of myself. Dr. Hahn hated me for the first couple of months; I had to fight tooth-and-nail to get into her good graces. I had to pretend I was over you at work but at night I wouldn't be able to sleep because you weren't there next to me. I hated the pitying look I got from my friends, Dr. Bailey and hell even the chief himself", Cristina said, halting for a second to gather her thoughts.

"I was finally healing, after 5 months, I found myself getting better, I found myself not missing you all the time. I realized that the fact that you weren't here was the best part because it made it a little easier for me to get over you and our relationship. And just when things start to look up for me, the chief post that stupid news clipping about you winning the Harper Avery award. Every progress I had made up until that point about moving on, came crashing around me when I saw your picture on that clipping. It felt as if I had gone back to the night of our non-wedding, but this time there was anger mingled with the hurt. You know why? Because not once in that article did my name appear. I helped you with all your research, I performed your surgeries when your hand had the tremors, I was your right hand man, but not once in that whole article did you put my name. I did all you asked of me without a word, I spent nights researching on your surgeries, and never claimed the credit, it was always you who got the credit, and the one chance you get to recognize my effort, you blow it off. Why does it always have to be about you?", Cristina asked blinking away the tears that had appeared in her eyes as she thought about the sleepless nights she had spent after that article had came out.

"I didn't know it would affect you so much", Burke mumbled, not knowing how to answer to her rant. He didn't know that not mentioning her in the article would have hurt her so much.

"Of course you didn't. You didn't know anything about me, how would you know what would affect me and what wouldn't", Cristina said sarcastically.

And for the first time since she came into the room, she turned her head and made eye-contact with Burke.

"Let me ask you a question Burke. Had I been in your place and you in mine, how would you have reacted? What if it had been me that left you at the altar on our wedding day, moved all the way across the country without a word, and then returned six months later. How would you have felt? Would you have wanted to see my face ever again? Would you have ever forgiven me?" Cristina asked gauging the reactions of Burke's face.

Burke listened in shock as Cristina laid the situation in front of him. How would be have felt if Cristina had done all that to him? As Burke mentally pictured the situation, he realized with a sinking feeling that he would never want to see Cristina ever again, had she done something like that and he sure as hell would have never forgiven her.

When Burke didn't speak, Cristina's expression turned into a satisfied one as she said, "Your silence spoke volumes Burke. Now do you realize where I am coming from? Now you know why I can't accept you back in my life, you would have done the same thing had our situation been reversed. You have no right to complain about the way I am treating you, because in my eyes that's the only way you should be treated. And don't stand there pretending that you have any idea what I went through in the past six months, because you don't have a clue. So while you might be sorry for what you did, sorry just isn't good enough, not now, not ever", Cristina finished with an awful finality in her tone.

But before Burke could say anything, the door was opened revealing Dr. Hahn.

"Was I interrupting something?" Dr. Hahn asked looking at the tense look on Burke's and Cristina's face.

Regaining her cool, Cristina quickly turned to Dr. Hahn and said, "No, nothing at all Dr. Hahn, I was just reviewing the case's summary."

"Alright then, we shall proceed from here. Dr. Burke would you like to stay?" Dr. Hahn asked Burke.

"No, I don't think that would be a wise decision. I am going to leave you two to continue your meeting", Burke said, his eyes fixed on Cristina while she did everything she could to ignore his intense glare.

"As you wish", Dr. Hahn said trying to ignore the increasingly awkward atmosphere in the room.

Once Burke had left, Dr. Hahn turned to Cristina and said, "I don't believe that nothing transpired in this room while I wasn't here. Your personal problems are none of my business, but if you would like to take a couple of minutes to compose yourself, I can leave for five minutes, I don't want you to be distracted during while we are discussing the case."

"No, that won't be necessary Dr. Hahn. I am fine, I've been fine, and I am not stopping now," Cristina said determinedly.

Knowing that Cristina won't change her mind, Dr. Hahn took the seat Burke had vacated a minute ago and began the meeting.

**A/N: **First let me say how incredibly sorry I am for the late update. Like I mentioned in the last chapter, my school life has been completely crazy, which is why you had to wait such a long time for another chapter! However, my last project is due of Wednesday so hopefully updates will be much faster after that. Once again, I am really sorry. This chapter isn't as long as my other ones, but I wanted to keep the conversation real instead of stretching it with repeated stuff. For those of you who saw 4.14, you know where I got the Harper Avery award stuff. I loved Cristina's role in the episode it was so real and I really wanted to strangle Burke for doing that to her. Also, I would like to thank all my wonderful reviewers for your wonderful reviews! As always, for the next chapter, **at least 10 reviews**. If I get 10 by tomorrow, I'll do my best to post the next chapter. With that said, enjoy the chapter and please, please, **REVIEW!**

**Important- Please read:** I want to know if you want a chapter with MerDer. I can have a MerDer scene in the conference room. I had the scene planned out for this chapter, but it would have been incredibly long, so I decided that if you want it I can make the next chapter full of MerDer angst! Otherwise, next chapter we see some sense being knocked in Cristina from a very surprising source. So tell me what you want!!


	14. Exes and Arguments Part II

Chapter 14: Exes and Arguments (Part II)

_Last Chapter_

"_Good luck", Meredith whispered, and taking a deep breath, she quickly turned the door knob and made her way inside the room._

_--_

Derek looked up from where he was sitting on the table when he heard the door open. He saw Meredith enter the room and quietly close the door behind her. She turned around and made her way to the table her face void of any emotion.

Derek stared at her as she made her way to the chair across from where he was sitting. She pulled out the chair and took a seat still not acknowledging Derek's presence.

"Dr. Grey", he greeted after a couple of minutes realizing that Meredith wasn't making any attempts to start a conversation.

"Dr. Shepherd", Meredith replied in an empty tone not bothering to make any eye contact.

When she didn't say anything after a couple of minutes, Derek tried again, "Well you know why you're here of course…"

"Yea because everything is against me, and you had to choose me to be your resident on that stupid case", Meredith snapped, interrupting Derek.

Derek was completely taken aback by the snappiness in her tone. Not trying to sound affected by her tone, Derek continued, "Well, here's the case file. You can look through it so that you are briefed about the case and then we'll discuss about where our part comes in".

Meredith took the file from his hand and without another word immersed herself in the details of the case.

While she was going through the case, Derek busied himself by staring at the woman in front of him. The love of his life. The woman he had left his wife for. The woman who he had broken so brutally. He couldn't believe how cold she was acting towards him. She really had changed. She was no longer the weak and vulnerable Meredith he was used to.

He had thought that once things were over with Rose, she would come back to him just like she did after he had finally divorced Addison. Never in a million years did he think that she would not only be over him, she would also be dating someone who wasn't him.

To say that he was crushed when he found out that Meredith was dating someone else would be the understatement of the century. He was stunned, angry, betrayed and most of all hurt to find out that she had found someone other than him to make her happy.

While Derek was lost in his thoughts, Meredith was getting incredibly annoyed by the way Derek was staring at her.

"Would you seriously stop that?" She snapped after a couple of minutes bringing Derek out of his reverie.

"What?" he questioned stupidly apparently having no idea what she was getting upset about.

"Stop staring at me", Meredith answered coldly, turning her attention back to the file.

"Why?" Derek questioned playfully, knowing that he was pushing his luck.

Sure enough a second later he was met with a pair of extremely angry eyes.

"Because like any sane person, it bother me when I'm being stared at", Meredith replied in a fierce tone.

"Oh so it's not just me that do that to you", Derek questioned lightly.

"You do know that you're being completely unprofessional right now", Meredith retaliated ignoring his real question.

"This is me Meredith, since when have we ever been professional?" Derek asked desperately.

"First of all there is no 'we'. There hasn't been a 'we' for the past three months so really you should be used to it. Second, we are nothing but colleagues. You are my boss and the only reason I'm here is because I have no choice but to. Trust me had it been my choice, I would have not been here", Meredith said.

"Why does it have to be this way Meredith?" Derek questioned.

"What way Dr. Shepherd? The way in which we ignore each other unless we absolutely have to talk to each other. This 'way' didn't bother you while you were still dating your nurse. Why all of a sudden does this bother you so much, when just a week ago you were perfectly fine in ignoring me and my existence unless for work-related reasons. Now that your girlfriend is out of the picture you suddenly find the urge to talk to me?" Meredith questioned incredulously.

"I didn't ignore you when I was dating Rose…"

"Oh really? Can you tell me about one time in the past three months when you have made an attempt to talk to me unless for professional reasons", Meredith challenged.

When Derek didn't answer, Meredith smiled triumphantly, "That's what I thought".

"Oh so once again it's all my fault", Derek said angrily.

"It's certainly not my fault that you were so preoccupied with your girlfriend that you didn't notice anyone around you", Meredith said bitterly.

"Oh so you're saying that you were jealous that I was spending more time with Rose than with you?" Derek questioned heatedly, both of them forgetting the real purpose for the meeting. This had been the first time they had been alone in a room (excluding surgeries) since their break up and all the pent up feelings were surfacing, the feelings the two of them had ignored for so long.

"Jealous of that nurse? You've got to be kidding me. Why would I be jealous of her?" Meredith asked in what she hoped was an incredulous tone.

"Because she had the guy you wanted", Derek snapped and the second the words left his mouth, he knew it was the wrong thing to say.

Meredith eyes flashed with hurt and fury at Derek's words.

"Wait, did you just say that I was jealous because she had what I didn't. I believe in the contrary Dr. Shepherd. I owe Rose a huge thank for taking you away from my life. I needed to have my own life, my own personality, without trying to please someone else with my decisions and by you gone from my life, I managed to become me. Its surprising how fast a person can heal without having to live up to mommy's expectations or trying to salvage a failed relationship. I am different person now, much more stronger, more determined. I don't need a man, specifically you, in my life to be my knight in shining whatever. I can take care of myself. And for the first time in an incredibly long time, I'm truly happy. And the only person I can thank for all these improvements is Rose, because she took you away from my life giving me a chance to heal", Meredith said, not breaking eye contact with Derek, wanting him to feel the pain that she had felt for so long.

Derek stood in stunned belief at Meredith's words. This wasn't how this was supposed to go. Meredith was supposed to see things his way, not thank his ex-girlfriend for taking him away from her life.

"What happened to me being the love of your life? I didn't know you could fall out of love that easily", Derek questioned.

"Correction, you were the love of my life. As much as I hate to admit it, at one point you were my everything, and I loved you in this huge scary way. But that was in the past, you've hurt me way to many time for me to still consider you as the love of my life. Love shouldn't hurt this bad Derek, and ninety percent of our relationship caused nothing but hurt and pain for the both of us. This isn't the way relationships are supposed to work. I am already so damaged with my mommy issues, and my daddy issues and abandonment issues, I don't want any more failed relationship issues on my head. I have tried to fix my issues and try to be a little 'normal', but like everything else that have failed in my life, I failed in that too. You probably believe that I'm way too messed up to have a stable relationship with you, and maybe you're right. But I was trying, I was actually trying to overcome my issues and ready myself for a stable relationship with you, but if you weren't able to notice that, then I think it was good that we broke up. If you aren't able to tell that I was actually trying to be the person you wanted me to be, then all my efforts went to waste. There isn't much we could have done to save our relationship. It was already way under the water or whatever", Meredith said trying to convince both her and Derek.

"Things surely weren't that bad. Everyone knows that you have issues and no one blames considering your childhood and parents and all, but I have had issues in my life too. From my wife cheating on me with my best friend, me moving cross country all the way to Seattle, going through divorce. All this in one year is a lot to go through. But there I was, still ready for a future with you, ready to have a house and marriage and kids with you. I didn't let my failed relationships get in the way of our relationship," Derek said trying to make her understand that it wasn't exactly all his fault that their relationship ended.

"Don't you think I know all that? I commend you for your bravery in going ahead with our relationship despite everything that went wrong in your life over the past year. But Derek your arrival to Seattle was nothing but a huge rollercoaster for mer. You came here, I fell in love with you, then your wife showed up and you pick her over me, crushing every good thing that had ever happened to me. Good things don't happen to me, and when you came into my life, for the first time I thought that maybe things will turn out be alright in the end. I beg you to pick me over your wife, but you ended up picking her anyways because you had responsibility. It took me a while to accept that, and when I finally get ready to move on and show some interest in another guy, you ruin another of my potential relationship. I end up picking you over Finn when he was clearly the better guy. Why? Because I was heads over heels in love with you. Then after your divorce with Addison you ask for some space and I gave it to you realizing that you needed some time to get over your relationship. Then you come back, tell me that you want to start all over again. You don't bother apologizing for all the pain that you put me through while you were with Addison. And I was stupid enough to fall back right in your arms without demanding an apology or even stopping to think if getting back with you was the best thing to do. You broke me time after time, and when you were ready to take me back in your life, I just fell in your arms just to be crushed again. So don't tell me that you were going through more crap to me, because I don't think anyone can catch up to me in the number of problems I have", Meredith said heatedly swallowing a growing lump in her throat.

"Everyone believes that their problems are bigger than the rest of the world", Derek mumbled incoherently.

By now Meredith had had enough of Derek and his crap. She was sick and tired of always being the wrong one, being the one who was the reason their relationship never worked out when usually he was the reason for their failed relationship.

"I am in therapy. Yea, you heard it right. Meredith Grey in therapy with a psychiatrist to help come to term with her issues. I was so screwed up that I had to go asking for help. I had to broadcast my issues to a stranger in hopes to finally overcome my problems. So don't stand there telling me that I am exaggerating my issues, because I am not. My life is so messed up that the only chance I have to ever becoming normal is to go into therapy. And you should be honored to know that along with my parents, you are also the person because of who I am in therapy. That should make you happy, even boost your ego, knowing that you had broken me in such a way that I couldn't fix myself with my own hands", Meredith said, tears threatening to fall from her eyes as she revealed her secret to Derek, a secret no one but Cristina knew.

"You are in therapy?" Derek stuttered, absolutely stunned at this new piece of information. Not in a million years could he have thought that Meredith would enroll herself in therapy. She was actually taking the steps to overcome her problems. At this moment, standing in front of her, Derek realized the true extent of the damage he had inflicted on the woman in front of him.

"Shows how much you know about me. But really Derek this shouldn't be that much of a surprise to you. Your first clue should be when I actually had the guts to ignore you and your advances, when I stood up to you in front of your ex-wife. I am no longer the same Meredith. I don't have to be the weak, submissive and vulnerable Meredith anymore. Three months have done wonders for me. For the first time in a while I am leading a good life. My career is flourishing, and I am in a stable and happy relationship. I have finally found a life away from all the crap I went through last year, and Derek I am begging you, don't ruin this for me. If I ever meant anything to you, then this is the time to show it. Don't barge into my life; I can't deal with that right now. For once in my life, let me be happy", Meredith finished with a pleading tone.

Knowing that this was his last chance to prove to Meredith what he is willing to do for her, Derek nodded his head, but couldn't resist but adding, "You say that your boyfriend makes you happy, but I know that he isn't good enough for you. He will never love you the way I did, and still do."

"He may not love me the same way you did, but he's a hell lot of a better person than you", Meredith snapped back.

Derek felt like he had been slapped by her words. How much hurt and pain could a guy go through in one night?

"Now if you don't mind, I would like to finish with this meeting. If we can't keep this completely professional between us, I can go up to the Chief and ask him to assign you another resident since we can't keep our professional and personal life separate from each other", Meredith said with an awful finality in her tone which left no doubt in Derek's mind that she would do like she said.

Knowing that it was a lost cause, Derek sighed sadly and turned his attention back to the case at hand.

--

When Meredith exited the conference room an hour later, she saw Cristina exiting the room to her right. Hurrying up to catch up with her person, Meredith quickened her pace till she was right next to her.

Cristina noticing her presence turned to her and said, "So how did it go?"

"An absolute nightmare. And yours?"

"It couldn't have gone any worse".

**A/N**: First let me start by saying that please don't kill me for the late update. My project was due on Friday and then my whole weekend was extremely busy, thus the reason for my extremely late update. On a happier note, but upcoming week is extremely light so updates will be much, much faster. I promise. From the reviews I got, most of the readers wanted a Mer/Der chapter, so here you go. I hope I did justice to it. For those of you who didn't want a Mer/Der chapter, I promise you that there are excellent Burktina chapters to come. I feel as if I have bashed on the guys long enough, now it's time for someone to knock some sense into Cristina. And that's exactly what next chapter is about. And so as soon as I get** 15 reviews** for this chapter, I'll post the new chapter up. With that said, enjoy the chapter, and please, please, **REVIEW!**


	15. Its just coffee

Chapter 15: Its just coffee

The next morning, Cristina was standing at the nurse's station flipping through some files when she was interrupted by the arrival of a very cheerful Jacob.

"Good morning", he greeted cheerfully leaning against the counter next to Cristina.

"Morning, how's your dad?" Cristina asked without looking up from her file, trying not to gag at the cheerfulness in Jacob's voice. Everyone knew she wasn't a morning person and she hadn't even had coffee yet.

"Oh he's doing really great. All thanks to you of course", Jacob answered in a pleasant tone.

"The credit all goes to Dr. Burke, I was nothing but a resident assisting him here and there", Cristina clarified.

"Yea, well I would like to think that my girlfriend is the one who saved my dad's life. And there was actually a reason I sought you out in the first place. I saw your schedule and saw that you and I are free tomorrow night, so I was wondering if you would like to go on another date", Jacob asked.

Cristina inwardly cringed at Jacob's question. From the minute he had stood next to her, she had felt a sinking feeling in her stomach knowing that this was coming. She knew that she had to end things with Jacob. She couldn't go on a date with him because that would be leading him on and that was the last thing she wanted to do. He was a great guy, he really was, but she didn't like him enough to begin a relationship with him and the argument with Burke had just been the icing on the cake. She had lain awake all night thinking over her argument with Burke and what she had realized from that sleepless night was that she still had feelings for Burke. No matter what she had been telling herself or anyone else around the hospital, she still had feelings for him, even after what he had done to her. When she had finally admitted that to herself, she couldn't help but feel that she had let herself down. Why wasn't she able to move on from him? It's been six months, seriously. But that didn't mean that Burke had to know about that. He would be gone in 5 days and she wouldn't have to deal with him. But she knew that she couldn't try to date someone when she was still hooked on to her ex.

Knowing that she had to get it over with right now while she had the courage, she slowly closed the file she was reading and raised her gaze to meet Jacob's questioning one.

"Um Jacob, I think we need to talk about this whole relationship thing", Cristina began unsure of how this would end. She had never broken up with a guy before and had no idea what to say, to do. In fact, she hadn't been in many serious relationships in her life. She had only been in two steady relationships in her life. With her and Colin Marlow, the break up was simultaneous, there was no future in that relationship, they both knew that. And then there was Burke. Well, she would rather not think about that right now.

"Oh ok, what do you want to talk about?" Jacob asked quirking his eyebrows, already knowing where this 'talk' would lead to.

"I don't think we should continue seeing each other", Cristina muttered in a rush, but Jacob caught every word.

"Is there any particular reason behind you breaking up with me?" Jacob asked knowing the real reason but wanting to hear it from her. He knew Cristina still had a thing for Burke. Hell, the whole hospital knew that. He saw the look Dr. Burke gave her when he found the two of them kissing in front of the OR, and he knew that it had affected Cristina.

"I don't think that's any of your business", Cristina snapped not wanting to elaborate any more.

"Oh I think it is. After all you're the one breaking up with me", Jacob retaliated.

"I don't think we'll work out", Cristina lied stubbornly.

"Liar", Jacob answered just as firmly not breaking eye contact with Cristina.

"You can't call me a li-"

"This is because of Dr. Burke isn't it? You still aren't as over him as you claim to be", Jacob interrupted bluntly getting right to the point.

"That's none of your- Wait how do you know about Burke and I?" Cristina asked incredulously.

"Please, who doesn't know about Burke and your relationship? Just because I didn't know you at that point, doesn't mean that I kept my ears closed to all the hospital gossip. Your relationship is legend, I am pretty sure everyone in the hospital knows about it", Jacob replied in a 'duh' tone.

"Oh well, whatever it is, it is none of your business," Cristina snapped and made to turn away but Jacob caught her arm before she could move.

"I am sorry about what happened between you and Dr. Burke. You didn't deserve that, and I can relate to how you would have felt-"

"Can you? Can you relate to how it feels to be left on your wedding day by the man you love? Can you really relate to that?" Cristina interrupted in a dangerously low voice.

"Well, I specifically can't relate to that, but-"

"Yeah I thought so, you have absolutely no idea how it feels to be deserted like that, you have no idea how it feels to see the love of your life just ditch you at your wedding because he feels its not the right thing to do. You have absolutely no idea, so don't stand there pretending that you do. I don't want others pitying or feeling sorry for me, I don't do those things, so just keep out of my personal business, okay?" Cristina said furiously, not caring if she was being rude of not.

"I may not have any idea how it feels to be left at the altar by the person I love, but I do know how it feels to loose a person you love", Jacob said calmly.

"Really? Who have you lost that was so dear to your heart?" Cristina asked sarcastically.

"My wife and my unborn baby", Jacob said, swallowing the lump that had suddenly formed in his throat.

Cristina gasped in horror as she took in the information Jacob had just revealed.

"Oh, I am so sorry. I had no idea", Cristina muttered, guilt eating her up from the inside.

"It's okay. It's not your fault. Not many people know about that", Jacob answered in a fake cheerful voice.

"Yeah, be that may, I have no right to say stuff like that when I have no idea about your life, your past or whatever," Cristina said.

"It's okay. She died in a car accident two years ago. She was five months pregnant. She died on the spot, she didn't go through much pain and for that I am thankful", Jacob said, closing his eyes trying to block out all the memories.

"I am really sorry", Cristina mumbled, feeling truly sorry for the man in front of her.

"It was hard, it was really, really hard in the beginning. Had it not been for my dad, I would have never made it through one of the hardest times of my life. That's why I freaked out yesterday, I couldn't lose him, not now. He had been my anchor when I was at my lowest point at life and I don't think I could have handled another loss so soon", Jacob said, saying out his fears for the first time since the death of his wife.

Cristina made to say something comforting, but Jacob continued to speak. He seemed to be in his own little world right now.

"We had been married for three years. She had just found out that she was pregnant 3 months ago. We were so happy because we have been trying for a baby for like a year before the result actually came out to be positive. The day she died, she had gone out to do some groceries, and I was in the hospital. It was around 1 p.m in the afternoon when I got a call from the paramedics. They told me that there had been a six car pile up on the freeway and that my wife was one of the victims. By the time they had brought her here, she was already brain dead. She was covered in blood and was deathly pale, but even then, she was the most beautiful woman in the world. Everything after that is just a haze to me. Everything seems so unclear, so rushed, I still can't believe that she's gone. She was everything I had, and in one minute, because of one drunk person my whole life was taken away from me", Jacob paused trying to regain his composure.

"Does it seem really stupid that I still can't move on with my life? After all it's been 2 years since the accident, but every night when I close my eyes I see her smiling face. It seems like I can't get away from her, and I don't know if I want to", Jacob stated.

"Well, while two years is a long time-"

"Is there a long time when it comes to love? I mean I don't think there is a time limit to how long you can love a person. When you're with the person you love, the person that's "the one" for you, even forever seems like a short time. I mean you and Dr. Burke were together for one year, and it's been six months since you guys broke up and you're still not over him. And no matter how much you convince yourself that you're over him, he'll always have this special place in your heart, because he was the first person you ever loved", Jacob speculated.

"The whole thing with me and Burke is very different-"

"How, how is it very different?" Jacob demanded.

"Well, for one he's still alive-"

"He's alive, he's alive Cristina, and if you can't seize this opportunity to try to make things work with him, then you are probably throwing away one of the most important thing in your life", Jacob exclaimed.

"Okay one, he's not the best thing that ever happened to me. Second, just because I am not as over him as I thought, doesn't mean that I still have feelings for him. Burke and I, we have been over for a while. There's no way in hell that I am going to make things work with him after the way things ended between us", Cristina ranted furiously, not believing that Jacob actually had the audacity to ask her to make things work with Burke.

"Oh, so you don't have any feelings for Burke?" Jacob asked, a plan forming in his head.

"Nope, no feelings at all", Cristina said determinedly.

"Okay, well I think I can tell you this now. You see that doctor there?" Jacob asked pointing to a very pretty doctor across the hall.

"Yeah, what about her?" Cristina asked eyeing the doctor with distaste, wondering where this conversation was going.

"Well, when I was coming to meet you, I saw Dr. Burke and her kissing in an empty on call room", Jacob said in a very somber tone.

Cristina felt herself gasp, as her insides clenched with fury at the words she had just heard. Her emotional side had completely taken over her mind, repressing her rational side.

"What?! You saw him kiss her? That skank? Oh that filthy little hypocrite, yesterday he was telling me how I shouldn't go around kissing random men and that he still had feelings for me and today he's making out—" Cristina's voice faded when she saw the triumphant smirk on Jacob's face. He had made the whole story up, and she had fallen for it.

Furious, she turned towards Jacob whose smirk grew even more at her facial expression.

"You tricked me didn't you? There was no kiss. I cant believe I actually fell for that. I of all people know that Burke won't go kissing random people in empty on call room just for the hell of it", Cristina ranted angrily, not believing her stupidity.

"Well, any other, normal person would have taken your reaction for jealousy. How did you feel when you heard that Burke had kissed someone who wasn't you? I am pretty sure it wasn't a pretty feeling", Jacob said, trying to make the stubborn woman admit to something that was so obvious to everyone but her.

"I didn't feel anything, okay? I don't care about him anymore and I would really like it if you would just let go of the topic and go break some bones", Cristina said, still not letting go of her denial.

"You know the day before my wife died, we got into a stupid fight. We didn't speak to each other the whole night, and neither of us were able to sleep. The next morning, I realized how ridiculous our fight was and I apologized. I kissed her goodbye and told her that I loved her. And that was the last thing I said to her. Now, had I not swallowed my pride and apologized, and had she died knowing that I was mad at her, I would have never forgiven myself. When she died, she knew that I loved her, and I think it was that knowledge more than anything that helped me get back to my feet after her death. Everyone makes mistakes in relationships, some are big and some are insignificant, but if the person is worth it, you will not hold a grudge against them forever-"

"Oh you're so wrong in this. What Burke did was not a mistake. He left me at the altar on our wedding day without a legitimate reason. I am pretty sure that wasn't a mistake. He never came to say good bye, I didn't know where he was for the past six months, and had it not been for this stupid case, I would have never seen him again. He never tried to contact me or explain why he did what he did. I don't think he considers a mistake. All I believe is that he never loved me, because you don't do something like that to the person you love", Cristina said.

"Well, I believe different. I saw the way he was looking at you when we he saw us kissing yesterday. He was looking at you with a defeated look that clearly portrayed his hurt, jealously and most of all love, the love he felt for you. It was the way I used to look at my wife, I would know that look anywhere. So, don't stand there thinking that Burke never loved you, because he did and he still does", Jacob stated.

"Yeah sure, whatever. I don't want to discuss this with you. Maybe Burke still loves me, but he's only here for a week. After that, he'll be gone, again. I don't see any hope for us, okay? I believed that there was a future for us, but my hopes were brutally crushed when he left without a word six months ago. I am not a very hopeful person, and I am not going to even give myself hope this time, because well, everything's over. I am done, I can't let myself in and then get hurt again when he leaves in a week without looking back", Cristina said, opening up just a bit.

"You're afraid of losing him all over again. That's why you're being so cold and distant towards him. You don't want to get close and end up hurt again", Jacob rationalized, finally seeing Cristina's predicament.

"What are you? My psychiatrist?" Cristina asked annoyed as Jacob repeated everything she just said.

"Well I did minor is psychology, but that's not the point-"

"Well than what is the point? What is the point of this ridiculous conversation Jacob?"

Cristina asked impatiently.

"The point is that I want you to get your happy ending-"

"There is no such thing as a happy ending", Cristina muttered bitterly.

"There's a happy ending out there for each of us. Right now Burke believes that you hate him, and while to some extent that might be true, that's what's stopping him from approaching you. If you would just swallow your pride and make the first move-"

"You want me to swallow my pride? Please, I don't have any pride left, but if you think I am just going to fall into his arms, you are seriously mistaken. I can't believe that after knowing everything that happened between me and Burke, you are still taking his side", Cristina said indigently.

"I am not taking his side, and I am not asking you to fall into his arms. That's not something you do, and you shouldn't do that either. But what you should try to to do is to let him in just a little bit. If you are sure that you want to get over him, then let go of all the bitterness you have towards him, trust me it will make you get over him quickly. I don't mean that you should go around being his friend or anything, but just try to be a little nicer towards him. Acknowledge his presence, clear the air between you guys. Trust me, once the bitterness is gone, the road to recovery will be much easier. What he did was wrong, but I think now is the best time to settle everything one way or another. But Cristina, true love don't knock on your door everyday, keep that it mind when you make any decision regarding your relationship with Burke", Jacob said seriously.

"And what if it all backfires on me?" Cristina asked, not believing that she was actually contemplating this idea.

"It won't. You have to take my word on this. And if you love Burke just as much as he loves you, then you know better than anyone how important the next few days are for you. Swallow your pride just this one Cristina and make the first move, trust me in the end you'll be glad that you did", Jacob finished knowing that he had gotten his point across.

"Forget about breaking bones for the rest of your life, you should become a psychiatrist", Cristina muttered jokingly trying to process the sudden turn of events.

"I should, shouldn't I? Anyways, I have to go check on some patients and break some bones. I'll see you around. And Cristina, good luck, and I really mean it. You might not believe in happy endings, but you definitely deserve one nonetheless", Jacob said, and with that, he turned around and started to walk away.

He had walked only a couple of feet away, when Cristina called out to him,

"Hey Jacob?"

"What?"

"Thanks, I really mean it", Cristina said uncomfortably, not used to saying stuff like that.

"No problem. Just send me a chocolate ice cream cake as a sign of thank you when you and Burke get together", Jacob joked as he continued on his way.

Once Jacob had left, Cristina turned back to the file she was reading.

A minute later, she was once again interrupted by a coffee cup being slid her way. Looking up, she was surprised to see Burke standing next to her, pretending to be immersed in a case file. She was just about to snap at him, when she remembered her conversation with Jacob.

"What's this?" she asked trying not to sound too hostile.

"Coffee", Burke answered not looking up from his file, surprised at the calmness in Cristina's tone.

"I can see that it's coffee, but what is it doing here?" Cristina asked not in the mood for jokes.

"It's yours", Burke replied simply, finally looking up from his file.

"Mine? Oh, you are trying to pull that whole déjà vu thing aren't you", Cristina asked, remembering their first ever conversation more than a year ago over a cup of coffee and what it had led to.

"What are you talking about? I saw you come in without a coffee cup and I thought you might need one, that's all", Burke answered in an innocent tone.

"Don't pull that shit on me Burke, I know what you are trying to do", Cristina snapped her patience wavering.

"What am I trying to do?" Burke asked, clearly enjoying himself.

"You're just trying to get into my pants like last time. Well let me tell you, things are very different from last time. I know better this time to fall for your gentlemanly gestures", Cristina said through gritted teeth.

"I don't know what you're talking about Cristina. Its just coffee without any hidden motives. I am appalled you'd think I would offer you coffee just to get into your pants like you so eloquently put it. And if I remember it correctly, it was you who couldn't resist me the first time", Burke said smirking as Cristina flushed.

"Well, like I said I was stupid back then. I know better now. I can promise you that I won't seek you out in an empty on-call room tonight", Cristina remarked.

"A man can hope can't he? And if I were you I wouldn't make promises like that. And by the way you're welcome", Burke said pointing to the coffee cup as he picked up his file and made his way to the elevators leaving a stunned Cristina behind. Did he just hit on her?

**A/N: **And this my awesome readers was chapter 15! Wow, this chapter took me ages to write. I wrote it three times before I was satisfied with the results. I really hope you like it. I personally liked this chapter because it is the turning point of the story. I love Jacob's part in it, and I hope you did too. I only got 8 reviews last chapter, but since it was all Mer/Der, I didn't mind that much, but please I need your feedback on this one. So enjoy the chapter, and don't forget to leave a **REVIEW! **


	16. Advice from an old friend

Chapter 16: Advice from an old friend

Burke was sitting in one of the empty conference rooms with his head in his hand. He couldn't believe what he had done just an hour ago. He had blatantly flirted with Cristina, and if that wasn't surprising enough, Cristina didn't seem to mind it much.

Approaching her with the coffee had been a very impulsive move. He just saw her standing there reading a file, and before he knew what was happening, he felt his legs moving in her direction. His body seemed to be moving on its accord.

He couldn't believe how smoothly he had talked and even flirted with her. He had always been on the down side when it had come to flirting but well when it came to Cristina, he had a habit of doing pretty impulsive things. She had a way of getting the worst, more rebellious side of him.

He was shook out of his thoughts by a light knock on the door.

"Come in", he called out in a tired voice.

The woman slowly opened the door, and walked in smirking at his disheveled state.

"Preston Burke, it's about time I found you alone", Addison Montgomery said as she made to sit on the chair across from Burke.

"Addison", Burke greeted wondering why she was looking to speak to him alone.

"We've been here 3 days and this is the first time I have gotten a chance to talk to you. Where've you been?" Addison asked making herself comfortable.

"I've been busy Addison, the hospital's been swamped with cardio cases all of a sudden, and the chief asked me to take over some of the cases from Dr. Hahn", Burke explained.

"Well Seattle's best cardio surgeon is back in town, of course there will be many cardio cases all of a sudden. I heard that the chief's been accepting many transfer patients specifically for you. Apparently he has a soft corner when it comes to you and your skills", Addison said conversationally.

"I think I can say the same thing for you Addison. It's no surprise that Richard wants you back at Seattle Grace", Burke replied.

"Yea, he's trying very hard for me to transfer back here", Addison said laughing, "And it's not like I don't miss Seattle, because I really do. This hospital and all the people here had played a big part in my life, but it's time for a new start, a new beginning. I went to LA for the same reason you transferred to Boston, for a fresh start, to get away from all the crap going around here. Moving to LA and starting my own practice has done wonders for me, and honestly for the first time in a long time I feel myself to be really happy".

"I am happy for you Addison, I really am. I can't think of any other person who deserves happiness more than you do, especially after all the crap you've gone through in the last year or so. Now if only it was the same for me…." Burke trailed off.

"Boston isn't really suiting you is it?" Addison questioned shrewdly, "I saw it in your face the moment I saw you. The relief and happiness of being back at Seattle was so apparent on your face. It was quite obvious where you would rather be. Why did you do this Preston? And I am not just talking about the move to Boston, I am talking about why you left Cristina. I am not judging you or anything, I am sure you had your reason, but what came in the way of you getting your happy ending?"

"If only I could give you a legitimate reason for my rash decision. To tell you the truth, I don't have a good enough reason for doing what I did. And then moving to Boston seems to be a worse mistake. It's been six months and I still haven't been able to settle there", Burke said dejectedly.

"I guess it was harder for you to settle there because you had left so many loose ends here. For me it was easy, because I had completely closed all loose ends, finished all uncompleted business and wasn't leaving anything behind. For me it was a clean slate for a new beginning. But I guess it was different for you, I mean how are you supposed to start a new chapter in life when the previous one isn't completed yet. You left here without saying good bye, without giving any reasons, you just left, and with that you left many loose ends, ends that deserved a proper closure", Addison remarked thoughtfully.

"Since when did you get so philosophical?", Burke asked teasingly.

"It's not so much as philosophy than it is common sense", Addison replied simply.

"My life is so screwed up right now, you have no idea. Everything just seems to be slipping out of my grasp, and I can do nothing but stand and watch everything just fall apart", Burke muttered bitterly.

"Well then don't just stand there, do something about it. You may not know it, but your life is still in your hands at the moment. You still have the power to make things right once again. It won't be easy, because the person who you are dealing with is extremely stubborn and hard to get through, but if you think she's worth it—"

"Worth it? Of course she's worth it. Why do you think I've been so miserable for the past six months? Cristina is more than worth it. In fact, now I am starting to think that she deserves better than me. Throughout our relationship, she did everything she could to please me and make me happy, and looking back, I am stunned at how ungrateful I was. I used to always complain about Cristina's shortcomings in our relationship, but never for one second did I stop to think how much she had given to our relationship. Never once was I thankful for the changes she made in her life to accommodate me. When she moved in with me, I never stopped to think about how big of a step that was for her, and instead got angry at her when I found out that she still haven't given up her old apartment. She was always the good one in our relationship, but everyone including me believed different. Now looking back, I realize that I was the one with the shortcomings, and she was the one who was always trying to make things work between us, and despite that she loved me, she wanted to be with me. How much of an ass does that make me?" Burke ranted.

"I am pretty sure she didn't think of this way. She wanted to make you happy because she loved you. She wanted to make things work with you because she couldn't see her life without you. She probably never gave a second thought to all that she had done for you because in the end it meant getting what she wanted and that was you", Addison said gently, trying to get through her depressed friend.

"Yea and what a slap in the face would it have been for her when she realized that after all she had given to our relationship, it was all for nothing, because her loser of a fiancé chickened out at the last moment and left her on their wedding day", Burke said, still not believing how much of an idiot he had been.

"While I understand that what you did on your wedding way was the stupidest thing I've seen anyone do, can you please stop self pitying yourself so we can get to the main point?", Addison asked wanting him to stop pitying himself and try to make things right with Cristina like he wanted. Nothing would be accomplished if he just sat there feeling sorry for himself.

"Main point?" Burke asked confused, "Isn't the main point of this whole situation the fact that I royally screwed things up?"

"No that's the 'I don't think before I act' point", Addison said dismissively, "The main point is, what are you planning to do to make things right between you and Cristina?"

"To make things right between me and Cristina?" Burke echoed disbelievingly, "I don't think that can be accomplished. In case you haven't noticed, she hates my guts. She doesn't want to talk to me, and when she does, it's forced. I don't think that things between me and Cristina will ever be right again. I am leaving here in 4 days and that's not enough time to make anything right. I can't make her love me again in 4 days, because according to her, she knows better this time".

"I don't think making her fall in love with you will be a problem, because she's still in love with you, so that's the least of our problems", looking at the stunned expression on Burke's face, Addison continued, "Don't give me that look Preston, and don't you dare contradict my statement with some pathetic excuse about how you screwed things us, and there's no way she's in love with you. We all know how royally you messed your relationship with her, and I don't want to listen to that miserable tale once again. I know you think that she hates your guts, because after what you did that's all you deserve from her. But I think I know people much better than you, and I am certainly better at gauging reactions of others. And from what I've seen of Cristina ever since I came here, there are some things I can say with absolute certainty. One of them is that Cristina doesn't hate you. She hates what you did to her, but she doesn't hate you as a whole. I think she hates herself more than she hates you at the moment. She hates herself for letting you in so far, for actually falling in love with you, and especially about how even six months later, she's still in love with you."

"I don't believe this Addison. She can't possibly be still in love with me. I mean you should see her every time I'm around. She either acts as if I am invisible or if she's forced to talk to me, she'll hardly say a couple of words and those too will be completely cold and devoid of any emotions", Burke said dazedly after a minute.

"I think you've forgotten what hell of an actress Cristina is. She's set up a wall all around her as a form of self-protection. She can't let herself open up to you, because from past experience all she knows is that she'll end up getting hurt and that's the last thing she wants at the moment. You hurt her badly last time Burke, and she's still not over that. She can't let herself open up and feel and then end up getting hurt again. But if you think about it, she'll end up getting hurt anyways", Addison contemplated.

"What do you mean she'll end up getting hurt?" Burke asked sharply.

"Think about it Preston, no matter what she tells herself or the rest of the world, deep down she knows that she loves you, and that doesn't go away just because she has cut herself from all emotional blow outs. When you leave once again in 4 days, she's in for another dose of heartbreak. Because no matter how much it hurts for her to see you here everyday, I am pretty sure that it hurts her ten times worse when you're not here", Addison explained, as she watched Burke digest what she had just said.

"I don't want to hurt her anymore. I don't want to cause her anymore heartbreak. Haven't I done that enough? I have hurt her more than she's ever been hurt before. I don't want to keep putting her through this all over again", Burke said his voice hoarse with emotion.

"Well then do something about it", Addison all but yelled in his face, "You say that you don't want to hurt her anymore, but you will end up hurting her if you don't get your act together, and try to stop the pain and heartbreak you've been causing her for the past six months. You don't have a lot of time Preston, and you don't want to spend the rest of your life wondering what would have happened if you had actually done something to make amends with the woman you love when you had the chance".

"What am I supposed to do then Addison? How do I make amends like you put it? You believe that she still loves me, but you and I both know that love is the last thing that will help me out in order to get Cristina back", Burke said, finally getting where Addison was coming from.

"You have to gain her trust Preston. You have to make her trust you again, trust you to not break her again, trust you to keep your promises. That's the most important and the hardest thing you have to accomplish if there's any hope for a future for the two of you. Like I said, Cristina is extremely stubborn, she will be incredibly hard to get through, but you also have an advantage, and that is that you know Cristina better than anyone, well maybe not Meredith, but that's not the point. The point is that you know her. You know her weaknesses, her strengths, her likes, dislikes and what not, and you can use this to your advantage", Addison stated.

"Well, the thing Cristina loves more than anything is surgery, but how am I going to use that to my advantage? I mean there's only a limited amount of things I can do that are related to surgery", Burke contemplated.

"Are you forgetting the position you hold in this hospital and in the hearts of the people working in this hospital. You may not be the head of cardio anymore, but you are still the most loved and respected surgeon around. All you need is to use that in your favor. I am pretty sure that you're going to be doing a lot of surgeries in the 4 days you're here. Let her scrub in your surgeries, let her do more than just stand around helping out here and there, because from what I hear, that's all she's been doing for the last couple of months ever since Dr. Hahn joined SGH. She isn't getting many chances to prove herself, and this is your chance to make her shine once again like you used to all those months ago. What I am trying to say is to be her friend. Get to know her all over again, respect her and most importantly show her how sorry you are for what you did. Like they say, actions speak louder than words. What you're going to do is show her how much you love her, how much you miss and how incredibly sorry you are for what you put her through. And you're not going to say these things to her either, she should get these messages through your actions. It's a hard job, but then again you're Preston Burke and from what I know, you don't run away from challenges. And this might be your hardest challenge so far, because this time two hearts are at stake. So, what do you say? You up for getting you happy ending?" Addison asked, knowing that she's gotten her point across.

"You know ever since I came here, I have been getting nothing but criticisms about the way I ended things with Cristina, and I fully deserved each and everyone of them. But Addison, you're the first one to actually come over and give me advice on how to get her back. And for the first time in six months I am going to let myself feel any hope that I might actually be able to amend my mistakes. You are my Mahatma Gandhi, the peace maker, and for that I am forever grateful to you", Burke said gratefully.

"Well as long as I get the full credit of getting you and Cristina together, I am not complaining", Addison laughed jokingly.

Before Burke could reply though, they were interrupted by the shrill beeping to Addison's pager.

"It's the chief, I gotta go. I'll see you later", Addison said grabbing her lab coat and getting up from her seat.

"Of course you will. You're my advisor now so you won't get rid of me that easily", Burke joked.

"Well glad to know I could be of some use", Addison laughed as she made her way out of the conference room.

Once Addison had left, Burke sat up with a new kind of determination shining in his eyes. He was going to get Cristina back, or at least give it one hell of a shot. He was not one to back down from a challenge, especially not a kind which was so closely related to him. He had only 4 days to get Cristina's trust back, he better get moving and fast. He knew it would be hard to get through to Cristina, she was probably the most stubborn woman he had ever met, but he loved her, and he was going to win her back. He had done it once and he would do it again.

**A/N: **A conversation between our two most missed characters! I hope you liked it….this will sort of be the turning point of the story, as Burke heads to win Cristina back like Addison has advised. I know you all are extremely mad at me, and you have the whole right to be. I think this was the longest gap between two updates, but last weeks of schools are just crazy, with final projects, assignments and exams….I haven't gotten time to breathe for the last three weeks or so. So, I am really extremely sorry for the lengthy delay. Good news is that yesterday was my last day of school, so from today to July 1, my whole attention would be on my stories. I leave on vacation on July 2nd so updates will be slow and in the 15 days I have before then, I am planning to update 8- 10 chapters (I am working on 2 stories, so I have to accommodate both of them). So as usual my updates depend on the number of reviews I get. So please keep reviewing and as soon as I get **10** reviews, I am going to post up the new chapter! Thank you so much for bearing with me, and thanks to all my awesome reviewers for last chapter! I love you guys!! So, I hope you like the chapter, and please **REVIEW!**


	17. Operation GCB

Chapter 17: Operation GCB

"You paged Chief?" Burke asked as he entered the chief's office 30 minutes after his conversation with Addison in the conference room.

"Yes I did, Burke. Have a seat, I have good news for you", Dr. Webber said pointing to the chair across from him.

"Good news, this should be good", Burke laughed lightly.

"Yeah I believe it is. A Humpty Dumpty case arrived at Mercy West this morning, and after some gentle persuasion, I have managed to scrape the patient from right under their nose", Richard said looking very proud of himself, "It wasn't that hard to tell you the truth. Once I told the patient and his family that Preston Burke was at SGH, well let's just say that they didn't need any more convincing."

Burke smiled as Richard retold the event in a heroic type of way, as if he had accomplished something very little people can do.

"So you called me here to tell me that you've assigned me on a Humpty Dumpty case that you snatched from Mercy West?" Burke asked humor evident in his voice.

"That sums it pretty well, but I like my elongated version much better", Richard replied smirking, "I haven't seen you perform surgery in this hospital for six months, and I want you to feel as if you're at home here, not just some random doctor at a visit. Even though I know that you're leaving here in 4 days, I want to feel as if just for a little while you're back for good and seeing you perform such an intense surgery will definitely lift the mood of the other surgeons in the hospital."

Burke silently sighed at the sadness in Richard's voice. He knew how much he wanted him to stay here and reclaim his old position. He himself didn't want to go back to Boston, but with the way things were going right now, he didn't see any chance that he might just stay in Seattle for good.

"I understand where you're coming from, and you have no idea how much it means to me that you are assigning just a major case to me, but won't Dr. Hahn be upset that you've assigned me such a high magnitude case when she is the head of cardio in this hospital?" Burke asked.

"She's doing a heart transplant tomorrow around the same time you'll be performing the Humpty Dumpty surgery. And while I know the news won't stay quiet from her, I just want to delay the confrontation as long as possible. And if Dr. Hahn has a problem, I'll deal with her, you don't have to worry about it", Richard said airily and it was obvious to Burke that he hadn't even thought about this before he brought it up.

"Alright as long as I am not clobbered by her, I don't have a problem", Burke relented.

"Excellent", Richard said happily, "You can choose your own surgical team because I am pretty sure that you'll want to first hand pick the resident you want to scrub in with you tomorrow…" Richard trailed off smiling lightly.

"Thanks chief, it really means a lot", Burke said gratefully wondering how many others are aware of his plan to win Cristina back. It seemed like everyone knew his intentions other than Cristina herself, and he wasn't sure if it was a good or a bad thing.

"No problem. And just as a heads up, if everything goes according to the schedule, the surgery is planned to tomorrow at noon, and patient will arrive here tonight", Richard informed Burke.

Burke nodded and turned to leave. He was at the door when Richard called out,

"And Preston, if you're trying to win her back like I think you are, then I wish you the best of luck because you are dealing with a very hurt and stubborn woman here and you will need all the luck you can get."

Without turning around, Burke nodded his head one more time and walked out of Richard's office a plan forming in his head.

--

10 minutes later Burke found Addison at the nurse's station on the 3rd floor. Leaning next to her he said, "I've got a great idea for Operation G-C-B."

Startled at his sudden appearance, Addison quickly turned around and asked, "Operation what?"

"Operation G-C-B", Burke repeated slowly as if trying to teach a young child the alphabets.

"Operation G-C-B", Addison echoed, "May I ask what that stands for?"

"Operation Get Christina Back or in short Operation G-C-B", Burke explained as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

To say that Addison was surprised would be the understatement of the century, she stared at Burke as if seeing him for the first time and finally choked out, "Operation get Cristina back?! You actually named it as an operation?"

"Yeah so what? " Burke asked defensively, "It gives this whole thing a sense of purpose and strengthens my resolve at the same time".

"Alright, so let's say that this whole thing made some sense in a weird twisted way, but G-C-B aka get Cristina back? Come on, that's like the least original name I've ever heard", Addison said trying to hold back laughter.

"Hey, it's not nice to make fun of people's ideas. And if that's not bad enough, I am guy", Burke said pretending to be hurt.

"What does being a guy has to do with anything?" Addison asked confused.

"Guys are not supposed to be creative and original. You should be proud of me that I came up with a name in the first place. It took me hours to think of G-C-B and now you're making fun of it", Burke said dramatically.

"Okay that was lame yet effective save right there. Maybe there is some hope for you out there", Addison said smirking.

"I am going to pretend that I didn't hear that", Burke said smiling, "And before you say anything, let me tell you the good news. Plan A of Operation G-C-B has been put into progress", Burke finished proudly.

"I am going to look past the absurdity of the name and ask what your ingenious plan A is", Addison said.

"Okay, so the chief has stolen a Humpty Dumpty case from Mercy West and has asked me to perform it. He also told me that I can pick my own surgical team since I might want to choose my own resident, which is obviously Cristina. I think everyone in this hospital except for Cristina knows that I am trying to win her back. Is that a good thing of bad?" Burke asked sighing.

"I think that at this moment it would be wise to keep Cristina in the dark about your intentions, because if she hears a word of your plan, she will blow out of proportion and that's not something that you want to happen just now", Addison cautioned.

"Yea, I think you're right", Burke sighed.

"When am I not", Addison commented teasingly, "For what it's worth I think it's the perfect start. But what did you mean when you said that the chief stole the case from Mercy West? I mean if he took the case without the permission of the chief of Mercy West, he won't just get in trouble with the board but with the law."

"Oh he didn't really steal the case, he just made it seem like he stole it to look all macho and heroic", Burke answered smirking, "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a resident to find".

--

It took Burke 15 minutes to hunt down Cristina. It seemed like she had paid everyone in the hospital to not tell him about her whereabouts.

It had finally been Derek who had told her to check Room 2100 where she was supposed to be doing post-ops for one of the surgeries she scrubbed in with him today.

So here he was standing outside of Room 2100 waiting for her to come outside so he could talk to her. He however had to wait only for a couple of minutes before the door opened and Cristina stepped out, closing the door lightly behind her.

"Hey", Burke whispered softly trying not to scare her. Too late. Cristina jumped a feet in the air at his voice before turning around to glare at Burke furiously.

"What the hell was that for Burke? You scared the crap out of me. You know better than to sneak up on me like that", Cristina ranted glaring at the man in front of her, forgetting for a moment who exactly she was talking to.

"Um sorry", Burke said lightly, not sounding sorry at all. Instead, there was a small smile playing on his lips. He couldn't help it. His girl looked so sexy when she was mad at him.

"Why are you standing there smiling like a goofball?" A very irritated Cristina brought him out of his reverie. "Is there something that you needed?"

"Yea actually I was wondering if you would like to scrub in one of my surgeries tomorrow. The chief has gotten this special case for me, and I was wondering if you wanted in, I've heard Dr. Hahn has been giving you a hard time when it comes to surgery so what do you say?" Burke asked getting straight to the point, knowing that there was no beating around the bush where Cristina was involved.

Now it was Cristina's turn to go into a daze. As appealing as it sounded to scrub in one of Burke's surgeries, she didn't think she was emotionally stable to handle that just yet. She hated the fact that she was so vulnerable around him so much to the point that it was affecting her professional life. When she had joined SGH, she had vowed to herself to not letting anything come between her professional life, and well then Burke came along, and things changed. Her life changed. So no matter how much she wanted a chance to scrub in some hard core surgery, she knew she wasn't ready to spend hours in the OR with Burke again, yesterday had been bad enough, and she didn't want to reencounter that experience and a sleepless night once again.

"I don't think so Dr. Burke. I am assigned to some other case, and I don't think I can get out of it. So as appealing that offer might sound, I will have to refuse", Cristina said calmly trying to ignore his intense stare.

Burke however was not deterred. He knew that it would take more convincing than this for her to agree to spend multiple hours in his company. He knew that yesterday was unpleasant and awkward for her and she wasn't in a hurry to repeat that situation. He however couldn't let her go this easy. It was time to bring out the big guns.

"It's a humpty dumpty surgery", Burke said casually as Cristina turned to walk away, knowing that it would definitely get a reaction from her. And he was right.

"What?" Cristina whispered spinning around. Surely fate was playing tricks on her. Of all the times to get a humpty dumpty case it had to be when Burke was here. On another thought, there probably was a case as big as this one because Burke was here. Ugh, life was absolutely unbelievable. She knew as well as Burke did that there was no way she could give away a surgery like this one, there was no way at all, even though it meant multiple hours in close capacity with Burke.

Taking advantage of her stunned silence, Burke continued on, "The chief assigned me a humpty dumpty case for tomorrow afternoon and I was hoping you would want to scrub in with me considering how you shined in that surgery the last time we did it. But if that other case is more important, I guess I could ask Mer—"

"No, no", Cristina gasped horrified at the thought of such glory going to Meredith, "I'm available, the other case can wait. I'll be glad to work with you tomorrow", she finished in a hurry. She didn't know what she was getting herself into at that very moment, all she knew was that there was no way she could let Meredith or any another resident on a case that was meant for her. She wouldn't be able to live up to the humiliation if that ever happened. Damn Burke for knowing her so well.

"Great, I was hoping you would say that. The surgery's scheduled for tomorrow at noon. I'll ask Bailey to assign you to me tomorrow", Burke said casually, but on the inside he was jumping with joy. His first step was successful, something to definitely celebrate about. But showing too much happiness around Cristina is never a good idea, and given the circumstances at the moment it was big no-no.

"Sounds great", Cristina muttered, but to her there was nothing great in this situation. Oh dear god, what had she gotten herself into?

Snapping her head as if she had a sudden idea, she turned towards Burke and with an extremely fierce look in her eye and said, "One more thing, tomorrow in the OR the interaction between us will be completely professional. You try to bring one personal topic or our past and trust me you'll wish you were never born."

There was so much ferocity in her tone, that it made Burke cower, and he was a good 4 inches taller than her.

Giving Burke one last glare Cristina turned on her heels and walked away leaving a dazed Burke behind. While there was no doubt in his mind that Cristina would carry out her threat if he steps out of line, the fact remained that she was going to be spending about 6-7 hours in his company tomorrow. It was a first step, it had to count for something.

Right?

**A/N:** Once again sorry for the late update! I am truly, truly sorry. Here's a new chapter for you to enjoy. I am really, really grateful for all the AWESOME reviews I got last chapter! Thank you so much, each and everyone who took the time to review! Don't hate Cristina in this chapter, she isn't ready for spending so much time with Burke and I know she scrubbed in with him when they were operating on Jacob's dad, but that wasn't planned and like I mentioned, it was really hard for Cristina! A piece of good news is that I am completely done with the next chapter! This is the first time ever since I started writing that my next chapter is done, so as soon as I get at least 10 reviews, I'll have the next chapter up. Till then, I hope you like the chapter and please, please, REVIEW and let me know what you guys think!


	18. Accomplice from the other side

Chapter 18: Accomplice from the other side

"Why do you look as if you have accomplished your biggest dream?" a tired Derek Shepherd asked as he approached a smiling Burke from behind.

"Oh no reason", Burke replied calmly, but the growing smile of his face told Derek that he was clearly lying.

"Oh there is a reason. There's definitely a reason behind that sickeningly blinding smile of yours. I haven't seen you smile like this ever since you came here. This has only got to mean one thing: You got lucky with Cristina", Derek said with a know-it-all smile on his face.

The smile slipped slightly off Burke's face.

"That would depend on what your definition of lucky is, because if you think in that perverted little mind of yours that I slept with her, then the only thing I can say is 'I wish', so no I didn't sleep with her. But on a positive note, it does have something to do with Cristina, just on a much lighter scale", Burke finished.

"Really, well this sound interesting. Share the details with your good friend Derek and then maybe we'll get a drink after work to celebrate whatever you accomplished with Cristina. In case you haven't noticed, I am pretty much a loner these days", Derek finished pathetically that Burke _almost_ felt sorry for him.

"Wow that does sound pretty pathetic. But Derek I have to say, you're sounding more like a nurse everyday. Never in my life would I have thought to see the day that Derek Shepherd would be interested in my love life, or the lack of love life. What's with the sudden interest in gossip?" Burke asked smirking as Derek flushed.

"Haha very funny", Derek said with a dry laugh, "Glad to see that you could find humor in my desperate situation. I've got to tell you though, there is so much drama going in my personal life that I really don't need to live off the drama in other people's lives. And what you're going to tell me isn't really gossip since I'm getting it from the first hand source, and I promise I won't spread it around. I really don't want Cristina hunting me down and tearing me to shred, because I have no doubt that she would do just that. Plus, I want to know exactly how much progress you've made with Cristina to determine if I should be jealous or not", Derek said matter-of-factly.

"Well considering that I have been here only 3 days, whatever success I have made with Cristina has to be better than whatever attempts you've tried to make with Meredith over the past month or so. So yea, you should definitely be jealous", Burke said lightheartedly.

"Yea, yea, rub it in won't you. The only reason I am really standing here is because I can see that you're bursting with excitement and if you don't share the news with someone, you're going to explode. So you see it's only from the goodness of my heart that I am here and you're making fun of me. That's not a very nice thing don't you think", Derek shot back, trying to make a cover up to not look so desperate.

"You keep telling yourself that. But I guess it wouldn't hurt to let you in considering you're just as miserable as I am", Burke started, "So, let's start from the beginning shall we. Today, Addison came to visit me. It was actually the first time we actually got to talk one-on-one ever since we came here. While talking the topic of our past and Cristina came up, and we had this long talk about how I left so many loose ends here in Seattle, loose ends that deserved a proper closure. She made me realize that the only constant in my life for the past six months were my thoughts of Cristina. No matter where I was, whether it be at the Harper Avery Award ceremony or in the middle of an intense surgery, there wasn't a moment when I didn't think about Cristina. The whole time, my heart was right here in Seattle with her. It was then I realized that I have been living a lie for the past six months, I can't be happy without Cristina no matter what I told myself and the rest of the world. I know I screwed things up, and up till this morning, I had given up all hope that maybe one day Cristina would be mine again. But today was like this whole new day for me. For the first time in six months I felt hope that maybe things could be different and that's when I knew what I needed to do to get Cristina back. I really just can't sit around expecting her to come to me, because seriously I would be delusional to think that, so Addison gave me some ad—"

"Wait, Addison gave you advice. Addison as in my ex-wife, gave you advice on how to get back with your ex fiancée?" Derek asked incredulously, internally berating himself on why he hadn't thought of recruiting Addison himself to help him get Meredith back. Addison had always been a match maker, and a very successful one at that. She had gotten together a couple of their friends, and each of the relationships had turned out to be a great success.

"Yup, the very same", Burke confirmed bringing Derek out of his trip down the memory lane.

"Wow, I totally didn't see that coming. I can't believe this. With Addison at your side, the chances of you getting Cristina back are really good. She's one hell of a match maker. I just can't believe I didn't think of this before. Oh I really am jealous of you now", Derek muttered.

"Well I was always smarter than you, so I'm not really surprised", Burke replied smirking, "But back to the real topic. So Addison and I came up with Operation G-C-B—"

"What's operation G-C-B?" Derek interrupted

"Operation Get Cristina Back or Operation G-C-B for short", Burke explained as Derek burst out laughing.

"And you call me stupid?!" Derek gasped as he tried to hold back laughter, "Dude that was the stupidest name I've ever heard".

"I would like to see you come up with a better name. At least I have some sort of a plan to get Cristina back and sort my life out once and for all. You on the other hand, don't even know where to start from, so I wouldn't be laughing if I were you", Burke shot back, looking satisfied as the smile slid off Derek's face.

"Touché", Derek muttered darkly.

"Sorry, I guess that was a little—"

"A little harsh, out of line?" Derek finished for him, bitterness laced in his voice, making Burke feel a little more than guilty.

"Yea, that was a little out of line. I am sorry", Burke tried apologizing.

"Nah, you're right. At least you're tying to do something, unlike me who's just sitting around watching the love of my life be happy with another man. But after what I did, I guess I deserve everything I am getting. I just didn't think the truth would sting so badly", Derek said as he returned into his depressed mode.

"That's not exactly true. It's never too late—"

"You know what Burke, I think this time it is too late. I've blown way too many chances, so for me, this is too late", Derek said sadly, "Anyways, I have to go check on a patient and I've surgery in an hour. I'll see you later, and Burke good luck, I mean it". And with that, Derek turned around and walked away, leaving a guilty Burke behind.

--

10 minutes later, Addison found Burke brooding in the same conference room they had talked earlier that morning.

"Hey why the long face? What happened?" Addison asked concerned as she walked inside.

"Mission accomplished, she agreed to scrub in with me tomorrow", Burke answered dully.

"And that's a good thing right?" Addison asked, wondering why he wasn't jumping up and down with happiness.

"Yeah, of course it is", Burke confirmed, yet his voice remained dull.

"Okay, what the hell happened? Cristina agreed to scrub in with you tomorrow; your Plan A or whatever that was is successful. The Preston Burke I talked to about an hour ago would be jumping up and down with excitement at that news. So who are you and what have you done with my friend?" Addison asked.

"It's the same me Addie. I am happy, I really am. It's just that something happened afterwards that put me in a pretty crappy mood", Burke admitted.

"Oh, you wanna talk about it? Anything I can help you with?" Addison probed gently.

"I think I put your ex-husband back into the depths of depression", Burke said honestly.

"Ouch. How did you manage to do that?" Addison asked sympathetically.

"I pointed out the fact that he was just sitting around doing nothing in order to win Meredith back. He got really upset and said that it was far too late to get Meredith now that she was happy with another man. He said that he screwed up way too many times and now there's no hope that he will ever get Meredith back", Burke explained dejectedly.

"Yikes, that was a little harsh considering how sensitive Derek is these days", Addison admitted, remembering how he had blown up at her yesterday for asking how things were coming with Meredith.

"I know that now. I didn't know Meredith was such a sore topic to Derek", Burke confessed.

"Yea, he's been really touchy on that for a while. Seems like things between Meredith and her lawyer boyfriend are going pretty good and Derek sees the situation as a lost cause", Addison explained.

"And if that wasn't bad enough, I also rubbed in the fact that you were helping me win back Cristina which obviously increases my chances of getting back with her again. And the most confusing part is that I don't even know why I am feeling so bad. I have definitely said worst things in the past and have not had a single regret about it. Feeling guilty about something like this really isn't like me", Burke mused.

"You've changed in the past six months Preston. You know how it feels to lose someone you love and you know how much it hurts. You might not realize it, but on the inside, you don't wish that hurt, pain and desperation on anyone. To top it all, Derek and your situations are very similar. Both of you lost your girls based on your stupidity and now both of you are fighting tooth and nail to get them back. So I guess you feel bad because you feel responsible for making Derek hurt like you've been hurting for the past six months", Addison explained.

"Maybe", Burke said uncertainly, "But Addison, I think you should talk to him. He needs your advice right now. From what I heard, you're one hell of a match maker and at this point a match maker is exactly what we need in SGH".

"Wow I am honored Preston Burke", Addison said laughing, "And if it makes you feel better, I will definitely be paying Derek a visit and try to pull him out of his depths of depression".

"Thanks. From now on, I officially dub thee the 'Match Maker'", Burke said dramatically.

"Jeez that makes me feel so special", Addison said a small smile playing on her lips, "Anyways, there was actually a reason why I sought you out in the first place. I came here to discuss with you something I thought of a while ago and I think it's important", Addison stated seriously.

"What is it?" Burke asked interestedly.

"I think we need an accomplice from the other side", Addison said simply.

"An accomplice from the other side? What are you talking about? What are we in the FBI or something?" Burke asked, looking at Addison as if she had lost her mind.

"Of course we're not in the FBI Preston", Addison explained patiently as if talking to a child, "What I mean is that we need one of Cristina's friends on our side."

"Why would we do that? Unless we have a death wish, that's the last thing we would want to do. You know as well as I do that none of them would be willing to help us, or worse, if they rat us out to Cristina, let's just say that whatever hope I had with Cristina would disappear on the spot and the only thing left would be a million pieces of my body after she gets through with me", Burke said shuddering.

"I understand where you're coming from Preston, but just think about it. I am pretty sure all of Cristina's friends want her to be happy and they all know that she's not over you as she claims to be. I am pretty sure that after some gentle persuasion and maybe a death threat or two, they would be willing to help us", Addison said calmly.

"Women the only person getting a death threat would be me if I even try to approach any of her friends. And the better question is why? Why do we need an accomplice from the other side as you so eloquently put it?" Burke asked frustrated.

"Think about it this way Preston. Here you are trying to prove your worth to Cristina, that would definitely put her mind into turmoil. But from what we know about Cristina, she would definitely try to shove down those feelings and try to pretend like nothing's different. Now that certainly won't do for us and if we have one of her friends on our side, then they would nag her until she admits what's really bothering her, and that's what we use to our advantage. Just when Cristina would be at her most vulnerable point, our accomplice could persuade her into our favor by telling her how you've changed and if we're really lucky, they could even persuade her to change her feelings towards you. Trust me, we will need one of her friends' on our side because only one of them can knock some sense into that stubborn woman", Addison explained patiently.

"Alright for the sake of argument, let's say that I understand where you're coming from. But you and I both know that there's only one person who can actually get through to Cristina, in fact, I think she's the only one who can mention my name around Cristina and not get clobbered. So in that case, we are not just talking about any of her friends, but her person. She's the only one who can have the slightest effect on Cristina and can actually make Cristina listen to her. Now all that would be very good for us I admit, but we both also know that recruiting her on our side would be one hell of a job if not impossible", Burke said trying to rationalize.

"Oh I know, I know that it would be extremely hard to persuade her in our favor, but just think, if you succeed in persuading her to help us out, then you chances of winning your women can be just within your reach", Addison coaxed.

"So you want me to talk to her and by some miracle persuade her to join forces with us?' Burke asked incredulously.

"Yes, I want you to talk to Meredith Grey", Addison confirmed.

**A/N: **Like I promised a new chapter in just 3 days! This was sort of a filler chapter, but I hope you liked it anyways. I have the next chapter completely handwritten and in my opinion it's pretty interesting. Burke and Meredith talk…what would Meredith's reaction be? So, what do you guys think, you want Meredith to help Burke, or do you want Burke to suffer more from Meredith's reaction? While I have written the chapter, I would certainly like to know what you guys want! For my reviewers for last chapter, thank you so much for those absolutely awesome reviews! I love you all!

And now for the first time ever, a sneak peak for the next chapter:

"_Okay, me doing a favor for my best friend's ex-fiancée is a big no-no! You know if Cristina comes in here and sees me so much as talking to you, let's just say that she will never speak to me again. I am not willing to risk my friendship with her for a man who hurt her so bad last time and who might just break her again. Nope, not happening", Meredith said stubbornly as she turned to walk away._

So that's it for now. Don't forget to **REVIEW!**


	19. Convincing a reluctant person

Chapter 19: Convincing a reluctant person

It took 10 more minutes of convincing for Burke to agree to talk to Meredith. He didn't know why he was so reluctant in approaching Meredith. No scratch that. He knew why he was so reluctant in approaching her and that was why he was so hesitant in the first place. While he could totally understand where Addison was coming from, Burke also knew that it would be one hell of a job to convince Meredith to help him win Cristina back. She was just as stubborn if not more that Cristina; no wonder they were so close.

But if there was anything that he knew about Meredith was that she was extremely loyal to her friends. She would never go behind her friends' back and do something that might hurt them in any way. He knew that Meredith had a perfectly rational reason to hate him. After all, he had left her best friend in the worst way possible and had left her to pick up the pieces he broke. If there was anyone responsible for holding Cristina steadfast through the darkest times in her life, that was Meredith.

Burke found it slightly funny that he was more nervous in talking to Meredith than he was before approaching Cristina. A logical explanation to that would be that when he was approaching Cristina he was offering her a proposal that she couldn't possibly refuse, but with Meredith he was treading dangerous waters because with Meredith his plan could be over as soon as it started. The fact remained that Meredith was Cristina's best friend, and there was a ninety nine percent chance that the second he approached her, she would go babbling to Cristina and that would ruin everything before it even started. However on the other hand if by some miracle he could convince Meredith to join sides with him, she would definitely be a great asset to his cause. In his case, approaching Meredith would either be a lose-lose situation or a win-win situation-nothing in between.

But Addison was not to be deterred by his pessimistic attitude and thoughts. Voicing encouraging advice and comments, she almost made him believe that he might be able to win Meredith's confidence.

So it was with a tiny ray of hope in his heart that he made his way out of the conference room and in search for Meredith.

A couple of minutes later, Burke found himself in front of the resident's lounge, where Nurse Debbie had told him that Meredith most probably was.

Stopping for a couple of seconds in front of the door, he took a deep breath to calm his nerves and slowly opened the door. He was met with immediate darkness, the only light coming from a partially opened window in the corner.

Adjusting his eyes to the darkness in the room, he closed the door behind him with a light 'thud'. Apparently the noise alerted the person inside the room because immediately the voice belonging to Meredith Grey called out into the darkness, "Who's there?"

Sitting up, she turned on the lamp beside the couch she was sitting on so as to look at the person intruding her privacy.

"Hey", Burke said nervously as Meredith turned around to face him.

"Dr. Burke, what are you doing here?" Meredith asked surprise laced in her voice.

"I was wondering if I could speak to you", Burke started, approaching the couch Meredith was sitting on.

"Aren't you doing that already?" Meredith said, her snappy side coming out of her as she realized who exactly she was talking to.

"Uh, I actually wanted to talk about something other than the usual pleasantries," Burke said.

"The answer is no," Meredith replied bluntly.

"What? You don't even know what I want to talk to you about. And what makes you think I want a favor from you?" Burke asked confused.

"Okay, the only thing you could possibly want to talk to me is about Cristina and it is not anything professional either, because from what I've heard you've already managed to get her to scrub in your humpty dumpty tomorrow. To be completely honest, I was extremely surprised that you actually got the guts to ask her and than to top it off, she said yes. You really know how to pull her buttons. So, Preston Burke the only reason you would go through the trouble to search me out and initiate a conversation is because you need to talk to me about Christina and need a favor from me," Meredith finished with a superior tone.

"Wow, you're good Grey. I am impressed," Burke said, surprised at how Meredith caught on so quickly and more surprised at how fast news traveled around SGH. I mean, he had only talked to Cristina about 20 minutes ago, and Meredith seemed to have all the details. Wow, Addison wasn't kidding when she said that Meredith would be a important gadget.

"The answer is still no," Meredith said ignoring his attempts to sugarcoat her.

"But you haven't even heard what I wanted to ask you," Burke whined.

"Okay, me doing a favor for you, my best friend's ex-fiancée is a big no-no! You know if Cristina comes in and see me so much as talking to you, let's just say she will never speak to me and I am not willing to risk my friendship with her for a man who hurt her so bad last time. Nope, not happening," Meredith said stubbornly as she made to walk away.

"Don't you want her to be happy?" Burke called out desperately, in a last attempt to slop her and make her listen.

"Happy? What's happy? Cristina hasn't been happy in the last six months. And do you why? Let's think! Oh, I know why! Her loser of an ex-fiancée who she loved very much left her on her wedding day without giving her one decent explanation as to why he was so brutally breaking her heart! Don't you think that seems to be a good reason to why she isn't happy? Meredith said, sarcasm leaking out of every word she said.

"Look Grey, I know that I am the bad person in her story. Don't you think I know that? One look at her face makes me fell like the biggest jerk on Earth because I know I am the reason for the sadness in her eyes! It's my fault and I ma not denying that and I hate myself for it. And while that's the truth, another truth is that I love her, and I have never loved any women or will love any women like I love her. In the past six months I have learned many things and one of them is that no matter how much I try, I will never be able to forget Cristina. Please Meredith give me one more chance to prove myself, and I promise you that you will never regret it," Burke pleaded, leaving Meredith in a conflicting situation.

On, one hand talking to Burke could seriously jeopardize her friendship with Christina, but on the other hand she was positive that no matter how much of an ass Burke had been in the past he was being completely sincere right now. Knowing a thing or two about heart break from her rollercoaster relationship with Derek, Meredith decided to give Burke a chance. Just to hear whatever he wanted to say, it didn't mean that she would have to help him. No, she would just listen to him for a couple of minutes and Christina would never know. It was a win-win situation for both ways. Right?

After a couple of minutes, Meredith finally spoke, "Fine, I am going to give you a chance to talk. I am not making any promises to you, but I am willing to listen. But, if Cristina hears a word that I had a civil conversation with you, I will hunt you down and tear you apart," Meredith said threateningly.

"I promise that Christina won't hear a word about this," Burke assured quickly after seeing the fierce look in Meredith's eyes. "Okay, as you know I am here because of the conjoined twin surgery. I only have four more days in Seattle Grace, and in these four days, I want to win Cristina back…"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow down there buddy. You say that you want to win Christina back? Let me tell you something that you would do well to remember. You can't win Christina back in a lifetime after what you've done, much less in 4 days. There's no way…not a chance in hell," Meredith interrupted bluntly.

However, Burke wasn't deterred, "I know it sounds impossible ad maybe it is, but I need to give it a shot. A full hearted attempt to win her back, so at least I know that I tried. I know that the odds aren't in my favor by a long shot, but I don't want to spend the rest of my life wondering what would have happened if I hadn't backed away at the last chance I got. I love Cristina, more than anything in the world, and these past six months without her have been hell for me. I need to give this a shot; if this doesn't work, then I'll see it as my closure. It would be something that might help me move on with life, but if by some miracle I end up succeeding, then you know the rest".

"No, actually I don't know the rest. Let's say that by some miracle you win Cristina back, but then what? In case you're forgetting, you both live across the country. You have a job in Boston and Cristina is never leaving Seattle. So the way I see it, your success will just bring more heartbreak to the both of you, because once these 4 days will be over you'll be on your way to Boston and Cristina will be left heartbroken once again", Meredith rationalized, not seeing how Burke will make things work out.

But to her surprise, Burke was ready was this question as if he was expecting it all along. He had been thinking things over the whole day and had come to the decision that if he ever managed to get Cristina back, he will move back to Seattle.

"I'll transfer back", he replied simply, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Meredith blinked at his confident confession. It was then that she realized just how serious he was in getting Cristina back in his life.

"You'll transfer back", Meredith echoed, watching him nod his head. "But Hahn's not leaving. You'll never get your position back."

"You don't get it do you? I don't care about my position, or being head of cardio any more. This place is my home and no matter how hard I try, I can't settle in Boston. Not even if they make me the chief of surgery. Cristina means more to me than any position in this hospital. These past few months have been a series of realizations for me, and the one thing that I have realized from all this is that without Cristina nothing have much meaning in my life", Burke finished passionately, looking at Meredith imploringly, hoping that she would see his struggle and sincerity.

Meredith felt her resolve crumbling at she looked into Burke's eyes to see hope, love, sincerity and fear of rejection shining there.

Giving in slightly, she decided to voice another concern weighing on her mind, "Let's say that I agree to help you, but what happens if Cristina finds out? She'll kill me if she found out that I've been so much as talking to you, let alone help you. It would be the end of our friendship, and my friendship with Cristina means more than anything in the world to me. I can't lose it just to help you in a plan that might not even work."

"I can give you my word that if you agree to help me. Cristina won't hear a word about it. I'll be extremely discreet and will never approach you in the hospital. If there's anything I need to tell you, I'll send Addison. She'll the messenger or something, I am sure she won't mind", Burke answered, choosing his words carefully. He knew Meredith's relationship with Cristina meant a lot to her, and now all he could do was cross his fingers and hope that his promise would be enough to make Meredith join forces with him.

"You promise", Meredith asked, her resolve strengthening.

"I promise", Burke confirmed firmly.

"Well then Preston Burke, I think we have a deal", Meredith replied after a couple of seconds as she internally weighed her options.

Burke blinked his eyes a couple of times as he heard Meredith agree to help him. To say he was happy would be the understatement of the century. But he decided to keep his emotions in check so as to not scare Meredith away just when she had agreed to help him.

"Thank you so much Meredith. You have no idea how much this means to me. I promise that I will not let you down or ever make you regret this decision", Burke said barely containing a smile as the gratitude he felt shone through his eyes.

"You better not Dr. Burke, or I'll personally make sure that you will never be able to have kids again", Meredith joked lightly, as she saw the pure delight and gratitude shining in his eyes.

Giving her a nod to assure her that he understood her, he quickly turned around and made his way to the door.

He turned the handle to open the door, but just before he walked out, he turned around and locked eyes with Meredith.

"You have no idea how much this means to me. So once again, thank you so, so much". And with that he opened the door and was gone, leaving Meredith in the empty, dimly lit resident's lounge.

Taking a deep breath, she flopped back on the couch praying with all her might that she had made the right decision.

**A/N: **Ok…let me start with how extremely sorry I am for this extremely late update. I haven't updated in months and you have the full right to be extremely pissed at me. But life happened and I was completely side tracked. Once again I am really really sorry! On a positive note however, I am back and ready to resume my story! So please don't give up hope! I really hope you like this chapter. It was extremely hard to write because both Meredith and Burke are hard characters to write! So please review and tell me what you thought about it. I seriously hope I didn't disappoint you guys.

Next Chapter: Cristina and Dr. Bailey have a heart to heart, which have a great effect on Cristina! I love Dr. Bailey's character and it would be great to see how her words will affect Cristina. So stay tuned!

And please, please, please **REVIEW!!**


	20. The first step towards healing

Chapter 20: The first step towards healing

_Last chapter:_

"_You have no idea how much this means to me. So once again, thank you so, so much". And with that he opened the door and was gone, leaving Meredith in the empty, dimly lit resident's lounge._

_Taking a deep breath, she flopped back on the couch praying with all her might that she had made the right decision._

_

* * *

_Dr. Bailey purposely stalked through the halls of Seattle Grace with only one mission in mind- to find her missing resident.

She hadn't seen Christina since last night. She hadn't even showed up for rounds this morning, something she had never done before. Something was seriously amiss and Dr. Bailey was going to get to the bottom of it.

"Grey have you seen Yang?" She called out as she saw Meredith walk out of a patient's room.

"No, I haven't seen her since last night. She wasn't there when I woke up this morning. I have been looking for her all day," Meredith said looking worried.

"Alright, get back to work," Bailey said shaking her head as she walked away from Meredith, wondering where Cristina could have disappeared off to.

"Dr. Bailey," Burke greeted as she walked past him so lost in her own thoughts that she didn't even acknowledge his presence.

Bailey stopped short at his voice, and quickly turned around to face him with a glare on her face.

"You," Bailey snarled poking a finger in his chest.

"Me?" Burke asked confused and a little scared. It didn't matter that she was almost a foot shorter than him, an angry Bailey always meant bad news.

"Yes, you. What did you do with my resident?" Bailey asked glaring.

"Your resident?" Burke asked surprised, "I am afraid I don't know what you're talking about Dr. Bailey."

"Like hell you don't," Bailey said angrily, "I haven't seen Yang since last night, she didn't even show up for rounds this morning, something she has never done by the way, so come on where is she? Don't make me force it out of you."

"Dr. Bailey I really have no idea where Cristina might be," Burke said honestly, "But I know she's here, because I did see her earlier when I asked her to scrub in on my humpty dumpty surgery."

"You asked her to what?" Bailey asked surprised.

"To scrub in on my humpty dumpty surgery," Burke repeated, not liking the way Bailey's eyes had narrowed at his words.

"And why did you do that?" Bailey asked in a menacingly low voice.

"Well because it's Cristina and—"

"See this, this is the reason I was so against you coming back here in the first place," Bailey interrupted sharply, "My residents have enough problem on their own without their exes showing up out of the blue and making things 10 times harder than they already are."

"Dr. Bailey I—"

"No, I am talking right now. You don't talk until I am finished talking. Seriously Burke what the hell do you think you're playing at?" Bailey spat out angrily.

"I am not playing at anything. I don't see why me asking Cristina to scrub in on a surgery with me is such a big deal," Burke said.

"It is a big deal you fool. It is a big deal, because you're messing with her head. You're giving her offers that she can't refuse just so you can spend more time with her, and I won't have it! You screwed her enough the first time, we don't need a repeat performance of that," Bailey said seriously.

"I am just trying to make things right with her Dr. Bailey," Burke said weakly.

"Yeah well it's a little too late for that don't you think?" Bailey said irately, "One week is not going to erase the pain you've caused her for the past 8 months."

"But—"

"But nothing Dr. Burke," Bailey said sternly, "You had your shot with her and you ruined it, that's no one's fault but your own so deal with it. Now you're my senior that's why I can't overrule your decision to let Yang scrub in with you, but let me get one thing extremely clear, after this surgery, I don't want to see you approaching her or talking to her unless its about the twin surgery! I don't want you to go assault her if she doesn't want to talk to you."

"And what if she wants to talk to me?" Burke asked desperately.

"If she wants to talk to you, something I doubt she will, she will come to you herself. I don't want you to give her any false hope only to leave a couple of days later. She can't go through that again. You get what I am saying Dr. Burke?" Bailey asked severely.

"Yes, Dr. Bailey," Burke said quietly knowing he had no other choice than to agree with the angry doctor.

"Good," Bailey said nodding, "And don't take this as an empty threat either, because I am going to have my eyes on you, don't doubt that."

And with that, Bailey gave him one last look before turning around and walking away leaving a gaping Burke behind.

--

"Debbie have you seen Dr. Yang?" Bailey asked as she approached the nurse' station.

"Not for a while. Last time I saw her, she was heading towards the back stairwell. She didn't look too happy," Debbie answered.

"Thank you," Bailey said nodding as she made her way to the deserted stairwell, hoping that would be her last stop.

And sure enough as she stopped in front of the door leading to the back stairwell, she could clearly see Cristina's silhouette inside.

"Yang what the hell are you doing here?" Bailey demanded as she made her way inside.

"Dr. Bailey, you scared the crap out of me," Cristina gasped jumping 5 feet in the air as the stairwell door slammed shut behind Dr. Bailey.

"Well what did you expect?" Bailey said sharply, "Where the hell have you been? Your friends have been worried sick about you. And what in the world were you thinking- missing rounds."

"Sorry Dr. Bailey," Cristina said tiredly, "I guess I lost track of time."

"Lost track of time?" Bailey repeated incredulously, "Lost track of time? Yang _you_ do not lose track of time!"

"Well I did alright." Cristina snapped, "I am not perfect for god's sake! I can lose track of time too."

"No you can't! Not when I am your resident," Bailey said angrily, "You know that I do not tolerate such childishness, so I am giving you one minute to tell what the hell is going on with you."

"Nothing is going on with me Dr. Bailey," Cristina said in a forced calm voice, "Seriously, I am okay. I am just having an off day."

"You seem to be having a lot of off days ever since Dr. Burke came back haven't you Yang?" Dr. Bailey said sarcastically.

"Dr. Burke has nothing to do with anything," Cristina replied in a clipped voice.

"Oh so you're not hiding out over here because you agreed to scrub in his humpty dumpty surgery and now you're regretting it?" Bailey asked shrewdly.

"I am- what- wait how do you know that I agreed to scrub in in his humpty dumpty surgery?" Cristina spluttered.

"I am Dr. Bailey, I know everything," Bailey said simply, "So you're going to start talking or what? Because I really don't have all day."

"I am just confused D. Bailey. Burke coming back here took me by surprise, that's all. It's no big deal," Cristina said bravely, really not wanting to discuss her personal life with Bailey.

"If it's affecting your work like this, then it is a big deal Yang. Now you either start speaking or I am going to suspend you for 3 days. Your choice—"

"What? You can't suspend me," Cristina said angrily.

"Watch me," Bailey said threateningly, "You've got 5 seconds. 5, 4…"

"Alright, alright fine. You win. What do you want me to tell you?" Cristina asked irritated.

"I don't know. I don't do all this feeling, emotional crap, but I am making an exception for you, so you better make it good Yang," Bailey said shrugging.

"Alright but you asked for it," Cristina said warningly.

"Yeah I know, now get on with it," Bailey snapped as she stood in front of her with her hands on her hips.

"Alright, well Burke is back—"

"Really? I hadn't noticed," Bailey interrupted sarcastically.

"Look Dr. Bailey you can't do that okay?" Cristina snapped, "You're the one who's standing here forcing me to talk to you about my miserable life, something that's already impossibly hard for me to do without you interrupting me."

"Yang—"

"If you want me to talk you can't say anything until I am done, and preferably not even then," Cristina said sharply.

"Fine, fine get on with the damn story," Bailey said rolling her eyes, slightly regretting ever seeking out Cristina in the first place.

"It's just too hard," Cristina started again, "Seeing him here again. I mean I was doing fine when he wasn't here, when I couldn't see him everyday, but then out of the blue he shows up without so much as a warming, and he expects me to pretend as if the past six months never happened. As if he didn't leave me on the altar on our wedding day and never looked back. He acts as if he didn't break my hearts into a million pieces, he somehow makes it look like it was my fault that he left. I can't stand being around him and pretend that everything is okay, that we don't have such a screwed up history. He keeps trying to talk to me, to intrude in my life when he has no idea, absolutely no idea how different everything is. And despite my best attempts to ignore him, to not think about him, to pretend he is not here, I can't, he won't let me. He knows me too well, he knows exactly what buttons to push to get me to react to him. He knows my weaknesses because I being a moron let him too in, and he uses them to his advantage. He's driving me crazy and now to top it all I am working under him and Dr. Hahn for the twin surgery, it's like I just can't escape him. And the harder I try, the more I get sucked into him," Cristina ranted, her face heating up and her voice getting louder with every word so that by the time she was done she was almost shouting.

Dr. Bailey however, didn't even flinch. She had been expecting this outburst, so once Cristina had finished she gave her a couple of seconds to compose herself before starting calmly.

"I know this is hard for you, and I don't blame you. I was so mad at the chief when I saw Burke in the hospital again. You, if not anyone else, deserved a warning that he would be coming back in town. So yeah he showed up out of the blue, and totally threw your world off balance, I get that. But what can you do about it? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Burke is going to stay her for at least another week, so you have 2 choices. You either stay hidden in this stairwell and have me suspend your or you actually hold up your head high and go throughout the day as usual. Will it be easy? Hell no. Burke will try to talk to you, he will try to get you to scrub in his surgeries, but you're Cristina Yang. You are not going to let a man put you down. You're not going to let him see how much he's hurt you. You're going to make him be the weak and vulnerable one. The guy broke your heart, but your pride is still here. You can't let him take that away from you. So what you're going to do now is take a couple minutes to calm yourself and then you're going to meet me in the pit and we'll go from there. Sound like a plan to you?" Bailey asked.

"Alright," Cristina said shakily running a hand through her face. She was tired, and mentally exhausted but she knew Dr. Bailey was right. She couldn't let Burke see how affected she was by his arrival. She needed to act calm and nonchalant as if nothing had happened. She had to give him a dose of his own medicine. Like Bailey said, she was Cristina Yang and she was not going to let a man turn her into an emotional mess no matter how much history was involved. So yes, she was going to scrub in on the humpty dumpty surgery with him tomorrow, but she would not let him affect her. His presence, his words, she needed to create a wall around herself to protect herself from those. Because her pride and self was the only thing she had left, and she wasn't going to let Burke take that away from her, no matter how hard it was for her.

"I'll see you in the pit in 5 minutes," Dr. Bailey said turning to walk out the door.

"Yeah, you will," Cristina replied in a voice that was stronger than she felt. This was her first step to recovery, to heal the emotional wounds she had kept buried for so long. She needed to face her fears in order to overcome them, and she was going to do it.

But like always, these things are always much easier said than done.

* * *

**A/N:** Wow, its been almost an year since I updated, I am pretty sure most of you have probably given up on ever getting an update again. But here I am again, ready to continue my stories once again, so I really hope there are still some of you guys interested in this.

I hope you guys liked this chapter, it was incredibly hard for me to write because Dr. Bailey is such a complex character that I never feel as if I have done enough justice to her. But I think she was the best one to get Cristina out of her funk because she's blunt, she's honest and she says exactly what you need to hear to get better. So we're at a conflict here, Cristina had just took her first step to really getting over Burke when Burke took his first step in getting Cristina back. So I am excited to see how it all unveils, and hopefully you guys are too.

**Next Chapter:** Humpty Dumpty surgery and a drunken encounter between Burke/Cristina.

**P.S:** Since I haven't updated in so long, I need to know how many of you guys are still reading this because the more readers I have the faster I am going to pace myself to update now that I am officially back to writing. My stories that take first priority are those that have the most people waiting for the next update! So please **REVIEW** and let me know if you're still here because it will really make me happy and give me the motivation to get the next chapter done faster! I am working of 4 stories so I really have to organize my writing time!

Also to you readers, I have a very important question for you guys that will pace the rest of the story: **Should I have Cristina/Burke sleep together?** (Drunken sex of course, but do you want to see it, or do you think it will be too complicated) Or if you don't want them to have sex, do you want a kiss at least, I am open to suggestions at this point so let me know what you guys think and I will try to incorporate as many ideas as possible in the next coming chapters that will really decide the direction of this story!

I know there are many Owen/Cristina fans out there now (me included) but I am going to stay true to this pairing so there will be no Owen (even though I do love him), sorry!

So, with all that out of the way, I hope you liked this chapter, and please, please, please, **REVIEW **because if you can read it you can review it! _(Goal: At least __**10 reviews**__ before next chapter!)_


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